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My First Thoughts - once I see my enemies!

Alright, I know hatred is horrible but I just dislike these three people so much. They were my 'friends' but now I know its only for the name. I ditched em and feel cool about it but they act as if they did nothing wrong and try to be 'goody two shoes' and i was like "You dodgey sauceages!" (LOL random)

So yeah, here's my first thoughts when I see them.

 

1) Man, she should stop straighting her hair. It will make her hair thin as a paintbrush.

2) They all are cakefaces, man when will they figure out it's no point wearing make up. Because it does not work on them. Or anyone else who try to fit in society!

3) (They pretended to not see me) "Be that way, jerk!"

4) They give me a dirty look "Eat my guts!"

5) They look at me as if i look inhumane "Come at me bro!!!!!!"

 

So yeah, tell me yours when u see your enemy! Smiley Tongue

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Re: My First Thoughts - once I see my enemies!

Hey Doni99 

 

It's a shame that you dont like them anymore but fresh wounds are always hard to get over especially when they were your friends.

 

I dont think I have enemies but one thing I realised is that thoughts become words and words become actions. So I try not to think bad about people even if I may not really like them. If I do have a bad thought I kind of try to back it up with something good about them so when we do encounter each other it wont be hateful. 

 

Do you ever have a good thought about your enemies? 

_________________________________________________
**Believe in the power of you because you are your own hero**

Re: My First Thoughts - once I see my enemies!

Hi Doni99,

 

Interesting thread you have started, because I guess in reality we will naturally have falling outs with people throughout our lives. I have definitely lost friends overtime, and looking back in some instances it was sad and completely avoidable. A blow up caused over something trivial, a disagreement or anything that causes you to grow apart.

 

However, whenever I see these people whether it be at the gym, down the street or whereever it may be I do not think of them as my enemies. I certainly dont agree with what happened, what they did, what they said etc etc BUT I try to avoid thinking negatively about them. Because there is a chance I hurt them, I said things I shouldn't of said, and maybe I did something they don't agree with.  It doesn't really make me feel any better to think negatively about them, or think about what happened too much. Instead I focus on the people I have in my life now- redirecting my energy, thoughts and emotions in a positive way.

 

People come in and out of our lives all the time so I think focusing on what is good about life, your current friends, or a nice memory you had with an old friend (even if you can only think of one little thing) is helpful.

Re: My First Thoughts - once I see my enemies!

I've been trying really, really hard not to think or say anything derogatory about people's appearance, even if I don't like them. I know how self-conscious I am about my own looks and how paranoid I am about people judging me based on it, so I don't want to do it to anyone else. I can't do anything about the way my face and body looks other than the most basic cosmetic care, and I know others can't either. Their behaviour is a different story though.

Re: My First Thoughts - once I see my enemies!

My top five reactions when I see my (well I don't really have enemies, but I do admit that I don't get along with everyone, so I'll call them...) people who I probably wouldn't become friends with in the future:

 

1. When they make a comment behind my back that you can see my underwear through my skirt (true story): "Oh, man I can totally work this bright pink undies showing through my black skirt look. Thanks for pointing out my new fashion statement, obviously you're embarrassed that you can't pull this look off".

 

2. They look at me like I've got smeared poo on my face: Me to friend: "Do I have smeared poo on my face?", friend: "No!", me: "oh well perhaps a bad smell crept up their nose right while they were looking at my face, a face which is looking damn fine today if I say so myself!".

 

3. Women with fashion looks I probably wouldn't go with: "Hey that's really not my style, but I'm glad she wore it, because if no one ever straightened their hair, slathered on fake tan or wore skin tight clothing, then I wouldn't know that it isn't the look for me and I might have tried it out! Good on them for feeling that they can pull it off, but I'll just stick to my pale skinned, wavy haired, baggy clothes style!"

 

4. Someone is really rude to me for whatever reason: "I wonder what awful stuff happened in their life that has caused them to react the way that they do? Although this is a bit upsetting, I'm sure I'm a lot better off than they are at this point in time. I'm just going to let this go, because if I hold onto the way I'm feeling about this then I might turn into a rude person and engage in the kind of behaviour they're exhibiting."

 

5. People cut in front of me while I'm driving: "Oh man, come on now you could have caused an accident, you may have no regard for my safety, but I do! Obviously you're in your own little universe and I can congratulate myself because I have a lot more respect on the road and they're probably more likely to cause an accident than me".

 

Doni99, I used to have similar thought to what you've written above. I used to get really angry or annoyed that people would be rude to me or do things that I wouldn't choose to do. Then when I hit my early 20s I realised that holding onto these feelings was really getting me down and causing a lot more harm that what was initially caused by the person who's actions I didn't appreciated. Now I know that whatever happens to me I can react calmly and know that I won't have to carry it around for a long time worrying over what they've done. We all have different experiences in life that shape the person we become and not all our experiences are good ones, so I always keep in mind that whatever is happening to me by that 'enemy' probably means they're having a really hard time.

 

Has anyone else got any positive things they say to themselves when something happens that gets you down?

 

Re: My First Thoughts - once I see my enemies!

LOL you legend! You are the person of the day! Smiley Very Happy LOLOLOLOL

Epic post! Worth high-fiving! Smiley Tongue

+ Thanks Atma, for the advice! Smiley Very Happy lol it's pretty hard to stop negative thoughts from approching my mind, lol but i try not to think that kinda stuff + yeah you are a mature person, me i'm 16 and is a jerk and i guess i have to hit 20 to be as mature and smart as u are Smiley Very Happy

Thanks homey for de advice, u;re awesome! Smiley Very Happy

Re: My First Thoughts - once I see my enemies!

Hey Doni,

 

No worries brosef, it's taken me ages to change the way I think about others behaviour, I guess it was a bit of a life affirming moment where I just suddenly didn't care as much anymore. That being said I still get a bit PO'ed sometimes and it can be hard when you're angry not to direct that anger at someone.

 

Keep practising and work out some sayings that'll work for you. The more you give it a whack the easier it'll become!