I need a name for this

I'm sorry I haven't been around much. I go through periods where internet-ing is just so overwhelming and I don't know what to say. 

So the other week I asked my GP what I am *actually* diagnosed with. She told me that I am diagnosed with social anxiety disorder and a 'depressive episode.' When I specifically asked, she also told me that I have 'bpd traits' listed in my file, which I haven't ever been told before. Over the course of one GP, two psychologists, numerous counsellors, an independent psychiatrist, and four different hospital psychiatrists I've been told I have:

- Trouble adjusting aka nothing shut up

- Mild social anxiety disorder/social phobia 

- Panic disorder 

- Generalised anxiety disorder 

- Severe major depressive disorder 

- Generalised anxiety with depressive symptoms 

- Acute depressive episode

- Depression with anxiety symptoms 

And I've been asked by other neurodivergent people if I have:

- Autism

- Bulimia nervosa 

- C-PTSD

I also have intermittent eating disorder symptoms and although I've never actually been diagnosed with OCD I've had mild obsessions-compulsions since I was about 8. I mean, I say mild but I have definitely attempted suicide due to how distressing they were. And I cannot be religious due to how severe they get. 

I guess what I'm saying is...I really need to know what is wrong with me. I need some sort of definitive diagnosis so that I can move on. And I really feel like a lot of diagnoses that I get given don't take into account how severe things can get. It's not that I want to be sicker; I just want to be taken seriously. But then...they're the professionals. If they think that all that's wrong is a little social anxiety which led to some depression, maybe they're right. Maybe I just want attention, or maybe I just don't have a realistic self concept of myself as someone who is doing okay. 

And I really do think it's possible I could have borderline personality disorder. My counsellor, who I really really trust, says she doesn't think so because some things I say don't seem like things that someone borderline would say. But still...black and white thinking? Intrusive thoughts? Disordered eating? Impulsive spending? Feeling abandoned? Idealising certain people to the point of feeling suicidal if I don't hear from them for even one day? Overreacting to the prospect of abandonement? Mood swings? Changing perspective on life and changing decisions multiple times over the course of one day? Oversharing? Persistent suicidal ideation? Constant guilt, anger and shame? Self harm? Needing attention and even lying to get attention? Being easily persuaded or manipulated? Hyperempathy? They're all kinda big red lights flashing at me every day. 

Help? I don't know whether to pursue a diagnosis for bpd, or if I should just accept my social anxiety/depression diagnosis and get on with life.