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Re: [SPECIAL GUEST] Consent

@FootyFan26 I really like your answer about asking, people should definitely lean to the side of asking more often than not to make sure things are clear Smiley Happy

Re: [SPECIAL GUEST] Consent

There are many ways to ask for consent, the trick is to not ask it the same way all the time. But you should definitely ask all the time. So there is a
• Do you want to ........
• I want to do ..... if that is okay with you.
• Would you like to ......
• are you enjoying ......
• can I ...

There are many more ways to ask, but that is all I can think of at the moment. Get creative! But just remembered the main goal is to establish whether they give consent or not.

My entire life can be described in one sentence: It didn't go as planned and that's okay. ツ

Re: [SPECIAL GUEST] Consent

What are some ways you can ask someone for consent? How often should you check? When don’t you need to ask?

 

I don't really have much more to offer, everyone has answered this question pretty well and I agree with all your answers. 

 

It might seem annoying, but its also sort of good to ask often than not all  but they are being clear then obviously you don't need to ask as often.

//You can stay afraid, or slit the throat of fear and be brave//
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Re: [SPECIAL GUEST] Consent

Yeah RE when don't you ask?

I think it comes down to how clear the person's body language is, what is your history with them (i.e., do you know them really well and can understand if they are comfortable with having sex with you), and have they expressed interest in that moment. But again, if you have some doubt about this you should ask rather than make an assumption.

Re: [SPECIAL GUEST] Consent

Here's a pretty great video by Planned Parenthood about asking for consent Smiley Happy

 

Re: [SPECIAL GUEST] Consent

You guys have got some great ideas about how to ask for consent in creative ways that don't make it a total down-er. It can be sexy, it can tell you about what the other person wants/likes, and it helps you make sure everyone is feeling safe & comfortable.

 

It seems like consent can be tricky to navigate, but it's also super important, so worth the effort!

 

So, the next anonymous question, which really relates to what we have been chatting about so far! 

 

How often should you check someone is okay with something? I was hooking up with a girl for the first time and i asked her if it was okay every time we did something new if you know what i mean. She thought it was weird and i felt a bit stupid for checking so much.

 

That’s awesome that you were checking in with her! Often it can take people by surprise when you’re super pro-active about consent, but I would encourage you to keep going. You’re being really respectful, and ensuring that both of you are safe and happy with what’s happening. Maybe think about different ways you could ask her about what you’re doing, by saying things like “does that feel good?”, “would you like me to keep doing ____”, or “do you want to ______”. By opening up those lines of communication, you’re going to make things tonnes better for both of you.

Re: [SPECIAL GUEST] Consent

I think body language can be tricky. I mean someones hormones might be saying something but their mind is saying something else. So just be careful with that one.

My entire life can be described in one sentence: It didn't go as planned and that's okay. ツ

Re: [SPECIAL GUEST] Consent

Annnnnd here's another great one by Laci Green, all the youtubes!

 

Re: [SPECIAL GUEST] Consent

Gah I love Laci Green!

My entire life can be described in one sentence: It didn't go as planned and that's okay. ツ

Re: [SPECIAL GUEST] Consent

Our next question for us all to discuss is...

 

What are some of the ways to let someone know if you’re not feeling comfortable?