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Re: [Special guest] CanTeen - I've tried everything, now what?

I think another good trick to try is to pactice stuff when you don't need it, not just when you need it. So on the best day ever, go do some self-care, reach out to a friend and have a talk. Consciously do all the stuff that you know helps you through the tough overwhelming moments. It'll help you remember to reach out for them when things are tough. 

Re: [Special guest] CanTeen - I've tried everything, now what?

Thanks for that response @Ben-RO - there are definitely some gems there, "worry wiring" is actually a thing.

 

I think i know i should meditate and i would benefit from doing it but i still don't know why I dont do it. Anyway - given us a lot to think about here @MaddyCanTeen thanks for your really great responses! Definitely staying in the moment is something I think I'm constantly working on. 

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Re: [Special guest] CanTeen - I've tried everything, now what?

@Ben-RO that's a really good (and practical) point! It might feel totally overwhelming trying to remember what to do when you're not in a good place, but the more practice you have (especially during good days), the easier it will be, and these skills will become second-nature after a while. Persistence is also important.

Re: [Special guest] CanTeen - I've tried everything, now what?

Yes! Self care on a good day is the best thing because it makes you start a habit. I did this journalling thing for a while when things were really bad and I did it everyday for a few months with a set of questions and then eventually i could just ask myself the questions and rationalise without needing it at all! 40 days to create a habit right? @Ben-RO

Re: [Special guest] CanTeen - I've tried everything, now what?

Can you give an example of what being non-judgemental might look like for a person? 

 

@Ben-RO @Stealth_ninja I think this is kind of in answer to both of your questions! 

 

So I guess when I think about being non-judgemental I am thinking about it as a basic component of mindfulness which is the idea of observing our thoughs, feelings, behaviours, actions etc WITHOUT judging ourselves (crazy idea right haha??). As @Ben-RO said before our brains are naturally wired against this idea which is why it is something that can take a lot of time and practice and still even after years of practice we will sometimes slip up! 

 

By being non-judgemental this means that for example if we feel upset we are giving ourselves permission to respond to this feeling however feels right for us e.g. crying and not judging ourselves for this feeling. Another example is if we are experiencing thoughts of suicide we are not judging ourselves for having this thought but rather observing what has happened for us to reach this place and then seeking help as approperiate. 

 

By taking this non-judgemental and open approach to our lives and our environments it relieves ourselves of the pressure to compare ourselves to others and everything else that comes along with judgement! The way I find it easiest to start being more non-judgemental is to just observe nature e.g. trees, flowers, animals - see how it feels to just oberve the green of the trees, the way they move in the wind etc. This is a perfect example of being mindful, engaged in the moment and non-judgemental all at once =)

Re: [Special guest] CanTeen - I've tried everything, now what?

I did a similar thing a couple of years ago as part of managing some anger that was starting to take over @Stealth_ninja. Eventually I got to the point where before I absolute lost it, I could run through the steps or questions in my head and in the end was able to take a breather. Should probably look at the strategy again now, in case it becomes a big problem again

//You can stay afraid, or slit the throat of fear and be brave//

Re: [Special guest] CanTeen - I've tried everything, now what?

Okay guys next question!

 

IT's a tough one!

 

There’s lots of things that help people in their recovery, but when it’s been going on for a long time, that can be really hard to keep doing. Is it okay to take a break?

Re: [Special guest] CanTeen - I've tried everything, now what?

@j95 it sounds like that was a really effective strategy for you! It definitely sounds like a worthwhile thing to try out again Smiley Happy

Re: [Special guest] CanTeen - I've tried everything, now what?

There’s lots of things that help people in their recovery, but when it’s been going on for a long time, that can be really hard to keep doing. Is it okay to take a break?

 

@Stealth_ninja I think that is such a great question!! Yeah of course! It is normal that throughout the different stages of our lives we will have good time and more difficult times so it also makes sense that sometimes we just want to take everything slow and give ourselves a break!

 

It is all about trial and error! If you notice yourself while on your break starting to go through some symptoms relating back to you chronic illness then it might be time to start doing some of your preventative measures again e.g. breathing / grounding exercises, self care, gratitude diaries. If we go through times where we want to take a break it is probably because our body and mind need a break and I am all for listening to your body and what it is telling you it needs - I find it almost ALWAYS right =)

Re: [Special guest] CanTeen - I've tried everything, now what?

There’s lots of things that help people in their recovery, but when it’s been going on for a long time, that can be really hard to keep doing. Is it okay to take a break?

 

Definitely, I'm taking a break right now!

//You can stay afraid, or slit the throat of fear and be brave//