cancel
Showing results for 
Search instead for 
Did you mean: 

15 year old incapable of letting go

I'm actually crying in my bed right now because of how fragile I am. There's no way around it: I'm just a fake. No one cares, no one likes me. It's easy for me to stoop this low, but it's true. I can't trust anyone anymore. It's who I am. And if people don't like it, they don't need to lie and say they do. That only makes me worse, makes the burden on them greater. I'm sorry everyone has to live with me, okay? I'm sorry everyone has to carry me on their shoulders just to get anywhere. I'm smart, I'm clever, but what do others care about that? They only look that I'm obnoxious, clingy, annoying, overconfident. I'm 15, broke up with two people, and can't let it go for crap.  I need to stop. And yet I just can't.

Re: 15 year old incapable of letting go

Hi @Matt1251,

 

I am really glad that you have found us. It sounds like you have been struggling with a lot of conflicting thoughts and you have felt you have to do this all on your own. Is there something in particular that has made you feel fragile tonight?

 

From your post, you are clearly a very caring and compassionate person but I am concerned you think others feel very differently. No one should be made to feel like they are a burden, even in the most difficult circumstances we all deserve to feel supported and appreciated by our loved ones. Do you have anyone that you would normally talk to about this, such as a friend or family member?

 

Please let us know how you're doing.

Re: 15 year old incapable of letting go

I don't really have anyone I can normally talk to, but people usually view me for my negative traits rather than my positives. You see, my relationships weren't in the real world per se, but online. You know those, right? So I don't really know who to trust anymore, and the stupid part is that no one is going to meet me in real life and say 'this is a person I want to talk to for awhile."

Re: 15 year old incapable of letting go

Hey @Matt1251 - so glad you found us. It’s totally normal for people to feel down about themselves from time to time, but it sounds like you are being really hard on yourself and if these feelings start to hang around all the time then it's important that you are aware of them and take action.

We're got quite a bit of info about the things you can do to improve the way you see yourself and improve your self-esteem. Things like positive 'self-talk', not comparing yourself to others, celebrating the small things and doing the things you enjoy are just some of the things you can do to start to recognise your value in the world.

Have you ever heard of the concept of self-talk before? Check out this info
http://au.reachout.com/what-is-self-talk

Also, check out these steps to improve your self-esteem:
http://au.reachout.com/steps-to-improve-self-esteem

Is there anything in there that you think you could try?

Online Community Manager

ReachOut.com

Re: 15 year old incapable of letting go

How are you feeling this evening @Matt1251?

 

An additional page you might be interested in looking over is about friends online.

 

Take your time going through all of the information, it can be a bit overhwelming. We are here to help go through any of it if you want someone to talk it over with Smiley Happy

 

Like @Sophie-RO said, it would be great to know if there is anything you related to or would be interested in trying. What do you think?

|| Life runs in cycles, the wheel never stops turning, no matter how dark the night morning comes, no matter how cold the winter, spring comes. When you feel despair know that the wheel is turning, joy will come. ||

Re: 15 year old incapable of letting go

Hello again

 

i mean, I could just tough it out but that's hard on my part.  Considering that she already has someone else just like if not better than me and I hate watching them cause it's demoralizing, but at the same time I want to say that I'm happy for her when really I don't know if I am.

Re: 15 year old incapable of letting go

Hey @Matt1251 thanks for coming to chat to us on here.

 

It sounds like there are a few things going on at the moment that are building up to make you feel quite down. It's difficult when relationships end and people move on and it's okay to find that hard or not be okay with that. It's always hard to see the person you wanted to be with, with someone else and it's okay if you're not happy for them right now but you will be in the future. Try to forgive yourself for feeling this way.


You seem like a really smart, clever and caring person but it also seems like you are your harshest critic. What can we do to help you see what we all see, here on RO?

 

 

Re: 15 year old incapable of letting go

Yes, there is a lot of stuff going on, and you're already helping Smiley Happy

I am a straight-A student and a smart person in general, and I try to help people the best I can into doing what's right, but I always seem  to go 'too far' with it.  If that's even a thing.

Re: 15 year old incapable of letting go

A week later and I still haven't gotten over it. Her new guy is hilarious and has a lot more in common with her than I do. I just wish I could be that person. Sometimes I wish that I could be a different person than who I am. This is one of those times.

Re: 15 year old incapable of letting go

Hi @Matt1251, sorry I'm jumping in this thread a little late!  There has been some great advice already and it's awesome to hear that some of it has helped.

 

Your last post from a week ago sounded really positive! You had some nice things to say about yourself and implied that you were feeling a little better, but now it sounds like you're feeling frustrated, angry, and maybe a little bit jealous. What was different when you were feeling better compared to now?

 

Also, you identified that watching them is demoralizing for you, so perhaps getting on with other things could be really helpful.  What other things do you have in your life right now? 

 

Finally, break ups aren't always a sign that you are 'worse' person, and they happen for so many reasons.  If you had a friend in a similar situation, what would you tell them?

 

(p.s. here is another persons experience with a break up, and how it lead them to better things (might be worth checking out))

 

Let us know how you are going!