Alcohol and personality changes

[Lilly_87]

Hi guys

just wanted to reach out and see if anyone else has this problem. Does it make you a more angry person and you find it hard to control your emotions? I sometimes struggle to contain how I’m feeling when intoxicated and can lash out unintentionally and it’s not who I am as a person. I end up extremely depressed and ashamed the following days. 
Ive started to give up alcohol as I get scared at who I become on it. I don’t know if alcohol is a trigger of anger or if alcohol is the problem itself. 

thanks for listening  

[WinterCalvino]

Hi @Lilly_87 im really proud of you for recognising how alcohol was affecting you early on and stepping back from it - that takes a lot of self awareness and strength and that’s super amazing!

How has it been for you giving up alcohol recently? Have you noticed a difference for the better? 

[Sophia-RO]

That sounds like a really tough situation @Lilly_87 . I think it is really great that you have been able to recognise how your behaviour changes and the impact that alcohol has. I am sorry to hear that you have been left feeling ashamed and extremely depressed. That must have been really hard. How did you cope with those feelings? Do you have anyone that you feel comfortable talking to about this?

If you were looking for further support around this, there are services like Directline that offer free confidential drug and alcohol counselling. You could call them up and talk to a trained counsellor about what you have been going through if you think that would be helpful

[celestialdreamer]

@Lilly_87 I'm sorry this is something that happens when you drink, it must be quite scary, but you honestly should be hella proud for acknowledging this is something that happens and taking some time away from alcohol. As @Sophia-RO said, it could be worthwhile to talk to a professional about this, to get down to the root of the situation and figure out some strategies to help, do you think this is something that could help you? I'm sorry that you feel depressed and ashamed after a night out, have you spoken to your friends or family about this? These feelings of anger, depression etc. with alcohol were experienced by a friend of mine who was on medication and just mixing alcohol with that did not go well for her. But she let me and my other friends know and we were there to help and support her with it and ensured no one peer pressured her or anything like that. I'm not sure whether this is a similar situation for you, but sometimes alcohol has some funky effects when mixed with other things or brings out feelings that have been suppressed. I hope you're going okay

[Milkninja222]

Hi @Lilly_87 

Hope you are doing alright. Thank you for sharing this with us. It must be a challenging time and situation for you. 

As everyone has highlighted so far, its good that you have noticed and acknowledged the changes you experience. Behaviour and feelings can change after consuming alcohol. Has anything happened recently?

[Anzelmo]

Hi @Lilly_87 

Alcohol tends to have different effects on different people, but being more expressive and emotional is a very common one. Overall people do have less control over themselves and tend to not think as much about the consequences of their actions whilst under the effects - So its not a "you" problem, that just alcohol in general. 

It's really good that you are aware of how you get when you are intoxicated and I'm proud of you for opening up about your experience. I know it can be hard to not drink when with friends and with the culture we have in Australia, but you definitely do not need it to have fun. It's also really important to note that it is very mature and responsible for choosing to stay away from alcohol, as others will try to just excuse themselves anyway and drink and potentially cause problems full knowing they aren't the best when drunk.

[Lilly_87]

Thanks so much for your response and support!!

It was difficult at first, especially in social settings as my friends are all big drinkers. I sometimes have 1-2 mixed drinks/glass of wine and find this is ok but can’t ever find myself in a situation where I am drunk and therefore lose control. I was realising I was always drinking to get drunk which was a really toxic situation for myself, and I was using alcohol as an outlet to escape problems but it was just creating bigger problems for myself. I’ve noticed a massive difference just from finally realising the problem and taking control of it. Hoping it continues in a positive direction

[Lilly_87]

@Sophia-RO thanks so much for the referral to this service, I will check it out as it sounds like it will be really helpful.

Coping with those feelings was difficult and for a long time I didn’t want to realise what the problem was but once I was able to acknowledge that I have complete control over the situation in that I can chose not to consume alcohol is such a bad way, it made me feel a lot better!

[Lilly_87]

@celestialdreamer thank you for your response and support! I actually have a psychiatrist appointment booked in next month upon referral from my doctor but it would be good to be able to have a more casual chat so I will definitely look into that service.

I have spoken to my boyfriend about it who it was impacting the most and also my best friend who are very supportive. It’s funny you mention that because I am actually on a fair bit of medication due to having an autoimmune disease, and mixing the medication with excessive amounts of alcohol I think was definitely not helping the situation. It’s really nice to hear that other people have also gone through this situation too. Sometimes I feel a bit isolated so thank you so much for sharing this.

[Lilly_87]

@Milkninja222 thanks so much for your support
6 months ago was when I really stepped up and said enough was enough and recognised the problem. Some comments were made in a social setting and i wasn’t ok with what was being said so I argued back with the person where if I was not drunk I’m the type of person that can recognise that it’s not worth it and walk away. In that situation, even though I was sticking up for something I ended up looking like the one in the wrong and it’s just not worth it. I wasn’t able to control my emotions and I usually am someone who is very forgiving and wouldn’t want to argue with anyone no matter what. Since then I’ve been driving everywhere when going out and things have been going good. It’s been tough over the holiday period though given all the social stuff but I’ve been getting through it