cancel
Showing results for 
Search instead for 
Did you mean: 

Coming to terms with it all! It took me 4 years

Hi All,

 

I must start by saying that I am very new to all of this, so bare with me. I don't even know if this is the right forum to be posting in, but here I go.

 

Over the past 4 years my life has been a struggle. I have battled every day with obsessive compulsive disorder, depression and worst of all a drug addiction. It has only been in the past few months that I have recognized and come to terms with the fact I have an issue, and more than one. 

 

I wonder to myself, "What has happened in the past few months to finally motivate me to change?" I have struggled with an addictions to marijuana/legal highs for the past 4 years, I am smoking just as much now than I was then, so why now? 

 

For what ever reason, I am truly grateful. I must have come to the point in my life where enough was enough. I am only 22, but I felt like I had wasted my whole life,I had lost all sense of reality, I had become such a bad person. 

 

I tried to get help several times, but there just wasn't much out there. I think I had it in my mind that I could rock up to a doctor, share my problem and he would give me some sort of tablet and everything would be OK. This clearly wasn't the case, so I just kept on smoking. 

 

I had the attitude that talking to someone would be of no help. How is talking going to cure my issues? But what an amazing difference it has made. I am only at the beginning of my journey, but if I feel this positive now, I can only imagine how good I will feel in 6-12 months. 

 

The past 4 years of my life have been the darkest. I have become a totally different person. I have bottled everything up inside of me to the point where I just couldn't take it anymore; it was time for a change. 

 

This is the most honest I have ever been with anyone.I have always been to embarrassed and proud to tell anyone. Most of my friends probably think I live a normal, happy life. If only that was the case.

 

TODAY, my journey starts here. It's not going to be easy and no doubt there will be set backs, but at least I have taken the first step. I have finally acknowledged that things will get better and that I CAN DO IT.

 

It's strange, a few months ago I wouldn't tell anyone, not even my dad or mum know and now all I want to do it tell the whole world. 

 

Thanks ofr listening to me rant! Ifeel so much better and positive.

 

 

Re: Coming to terms with it all! It took me 4 years

Wow! Welcome benny… What a hugely inspiring first post! Smiley Happy Smiley Happy Smiley Happy

You've arrived here with a huge splash! Smiley Very Happy

 

This is really great news and I couldn't be happier for you.

 

Do you think a lot of people have that expectation that a quick doctor's visit and a prescription will sort it out? What do you think can be done to change people's attitudes about that?

 

Gosh. I'm so glad you're here. You've really made my day. Smiley Happy

Highlighted

Re: Coming to terms with it all! It took me 4 years

Hey Benny,

 

You're awesome.  You realised that you didn't want to keep on going the way you were.  That's the most important step in my books.

My past still haunts me and I'm working through it...but the most important thing to remember is that the drugs etc...are not who you are, they do not define you and they never did.  All that matters is right here and right now and what you choose to do with iti.

CHEERS...and seriously, best wishes for the rest of the road.

Re: Coming to terms with it all! It took me 4 years

Hi Benny,

It's always so wonderful to hear people having hope and wanting to work for a better life for themselves after going through such tough times. And I hope that from here, things only go up for you Smiley Happy

Re: Coming to terms with it all! It took me 4 years

Hi Benny,
Thanks so much for sharing your story!
I think you've just taken the first step on a wonderful journey Smiley Very Happy
I think there are a lot of people out there who expect a miracle pill to just cure things for them instead of putting in the hard yakka to change things themselves. I'm really happy for you that you've come to a point where you're ready to make things better for yourself.

JDx