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Does the same dark cloud follow everywhere i go?

When i try to talk to new people or start a new job, does the same dark clould follow me.... No one wants to talk to me or i get a good conversation with me

Does this dark cloud follow me everywhere ??

Re: Does the same cloud follow?

Hey @Marcus29!

 

It isn't always easy to put yourself out there, whether it be in a conversation with someone new or with a job interview. It can even get to a point where it feels like an outside force, like the dark cloud you mentioned, is affecting every new thing you try and start, in any aspect of life.

 

How do you think this dark cloud affects you? Do you have an example of how it makes it hard for you to start up a conversation, for example?

 

If it helps, maybe have a look at these resources on problem-solving and socialising Smiley Happy

Re: Does the same cloud follow?

Hey @Marcus29,

 

I think @safari93 has given you some great questions to think about.

 

Has there been a specific instance that has made you feel this way?

 

Here to help,

 

Lahna

Re: Does the same cloud follow?

When i talk to someone i only get "short answers" but when they are talking to other people they have full and good tone conversations - is their something wrong?

When i start a new job or thing, all in get a welcome then turn into a brink wall - what am i meant to do? Start dancing like a crazy person to get some attention?

Re: Does the same cloud follow?

@Marcus29 did you look at the socialising resource @safari93 posted? Hopefully some of those tips can help. It can be really hard to have broad and genuine flowing conversations with people, especially new people. This can be a combination of things, perhaps the other person isn't a huge talker, perhaps they're having the same internal thoughts as you or perhaps you just don't click with them intellectually beyond a point? I find that using open questions and engaging their interests as well as explaining your own interests can really help in opening genuine and flowing conversation.

Re: Does the same cloud follow?

Hey @BazanFan

 

Yes, i did look at those socialising resources @safari93 posted.

 

Are you also saying, that i should share my problems? the people i am talking might have the same problems that i am thinking about?

 

 

Re: Does the same cloud follow?

@Marcus29 it can be really tough feeling like there's a wall between you and other people. I know I've certainly felt like that before. I find trying to have a smile on your face and actively saying hello (use their name) how are you/how was your weekend to people is a good way to try and establish yourself as a friendly person. Would that be something you could try at work?

And yes I think @BazanFan meant that other people might be having similar thoughts to you (Eg feeling like people don't want to talk to them)

Re: Does the same dark cloud follow everywhere i go?

Hi @Marcus29

I wanted to check in on you and see how things were going? 

Please keep us updated!

Re: Does the same dark cloud follow everywhere i go?

Hi missep

 

I am ok for the moment but i still feel that that dark cloud comes back ever few days.. ...... Has anyone else experience my bad luck or this dark and destructive cloud?

 

I want to get something new off my chest but i feel really embarrssed to talk to about - Stay tuned

Re: Does the same dark cloud follow everywhere i go?

@Marcus29, hey. I have a similar experience but I am such a crazy extrovert that even though I have the horrible dark cloud over me I act like I am fine and put on a happy mask. It is exhausting and that has led to my other problems such as sleeping badly, dealing with my anger badly and feeling awful which often leads to me having a bad temperment. I have being trying to stop acting like I'm okay all the time and talking about it, but it's hard. Everyone just doesn't quite inderstand and jsut says, oh you'll be okay. I find mindfullness helps. It's almost a meditation technique. Look it up, that is one way I stay calm and find it easier to be happy me.