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Everyday sayings

Why do we live in an society where it's acceptable to treat others like rubbish and to speak so negative. 


How do people put up with stuff like :

- your a wasted space 

- you only bring misery to this family

- you should listen to your family, open your eyes 

 - you should get rid of your Aussie partner, they are no good, you should get a nice European partner, they have money. 

- your a disgrace 

- make sure you keep your location turned on, so we know where you are

- wake up to yourself, your 25 and you've done nothing with your life 

- you say that I, your mother make you depressed, your not depressed your just seeking out attention and need to listen to us and the depression or so you say, will be better

- you think you know better than us, we know what's best for you.


How do people cope with these kind of remarks everyday? 




Re: Everyday sayings

@Tinkmatter  those sound like really horrible things to have to hear from your family on a dailly basis. Having loved ones be so critical and have them constantly try to change your behaviour sounds so hurtful and frustrating Smiley Sad I think you mentioned on a previous thread that they aren't really receptive to being told what they're doing is hurtful, but is there anyone else in your life that you can reach out to to talk about what's going on at home? Would you be able to get support from your partner? Heart 


As for hearing so many negatives things on such a frequent basis, maybe having positive affirmations you can fall back on might be helpful? To help challenge the awful things you're being told. For example, if someone says you're a waste of space, you can have that mantra in your head I am enough. I know it's a bit cheesy, but it can help to block out negative words or thoughts Heart I was also wondeirng if you've ever contact 1800 Respect ? They might have some advice too for what's been going on Heart


Sending a big virtual hug your way xx

We had a Live Getting Real chat to do with Friendship Drama on Monday the 17th of Feb! Smiley Very Happy Check it out here! Heart

Re: Everyday sayings

Hi @Tinkmatter, thanks for sharing all of that here with us. It must be so difficult to hear these kind of things daily. I think @ecla34 has covered everything quite well but I came to say that these statements must impact you so negatively. Some of these phrases may be classified as abuse as they are designed to damage your self-esteem, confidence and mood - it is very important that you have reached out. It is not an easy thing to reach out.. but we are so glad that you have because you are deserving of support. There is more information and resources on abuse here, if you were interested in finding out more. Abuse can manifest in many different ways and sometimes we are not even aware of it. It can be hard to admit that what we may be experiencing is actually abuse. One thing I do know, is that nobody should ever have to hear these kinds of statements.. let alone on a daily basis. Have you ever talked to a health professional about this situation? Just so you know, I have moved your thread to the tough times section. Some of what you mentioned might be quite distressing to others, so it belongs moreso in this section Heart We are here to listen.