Mt cancer has gotten worse and things are not looking great..
Anyway this is a bit of a rant..
So I have been talking to one of my friends about what's going on and how I'm not coping and she has been really funny towards me lately.. Like hardly replying to me or if she does she has been short. She has told me she has a lot going on at the moment and that's fine but when I tell her that I will give her some space she gets angry at me and goes off in her messages..
I feel so lost I don't know what to say to her.
I get that I have been annoying her with my messages but I just feel like I'm so alone at the moment with my family all sticking to themselves and not worrying about what's going on with me. I can't sit down and have a conversation with my mum and brother about what's going on.
I'm sick of being sick and going into hospital.
Re: Feeling alone
Good to hear from you again! Don't stress about not getting back to us quickly. We're a pretty patient bunch on here and don't mind at all .
I have a few ideas about what might help with the feelings of loneliness right now and the biggest one that I can think of is to connect up with more people, especially people who are going through or have been through something like what you're going through. So! Have you heard of Livewire? They are an online comunity that are run by the amazing people at the Starlight Foundation. I reckon you should have a look at them and see if you can sign up you can check them out by Clicking here .
With this friend of yours, it sucks to hear that her answers have been so short, i am guessing that makes you feel pretty isolated and a bit rejected . I am a bit confused about why she gets angry at you when you say you're going to give her some space, is it possible that what you're saying to her is being interpreted in a way that you didn't mean? If you want to, maybe we can talk together and work out how to say what you want to say to her!
I also hear that there's a lot of very big feelings happening for you around being sick all the time and feeling very alone. Would you be comfortable with talking to someone about this? Because you are a patient being treated for an illness already, the easiest way to do this might be to ask your treating doctor for a referral to a counsellor or a psychologist. These people might be able to help you work through these big feelings, they might also be able to help you to get your friends and family to understand what you need from them a bit better! I understand that asking for that might be a bit scary, how do you feel about doing it?
Re: Feeling alone
Hi Ben, no I haven't heard of them but I'm sure I can check it out..
I don't know how she is interpreting it but Inever meant to make her angry. I care about how she is feeling to and all she keeps saying is "it's all good" but I know it's not!!
I want to say something to her about caring about how she feels and all that but I don't know how to word it. I really value her friends ship and I don't want it stuffed up on just this
She has told me to go and see a phycologist but I don't like talking to people about it especially them people. I know they can help me but it just scares me..
Re: Feeling alone
I think a lot of people are scared of talking to Psychologists, that's a pretty normal reaction actually. Nevertheless they really are pretty awesome, especially when you find one who really connects well with you (although sometimes that can take more than one try).
Would it help if you got a bit of a taste of how a Psychologist can help and what they can do? If you want to do that, you can start by having a chat to someone at Eheadspace, that way you can see what it's like without having to jump straight into talking to someone face to face! If you're curious about trying that click here
I am really excited to hear that you might look into talking to Livewire! I really think they are very awesome at helping out young people who are in hospital or living with chronic health issues who are feeling a bit disconnected. They just understand this problem and a lot of other things associated with chronic health so well and work hard to help.
I want to talk to you a bit more about your relationship with your friend too. But I am going to think about it a bit more first. For now I will say that i think they mean it when they say "it's all good" I think this is a friend who really cares about you. They might be acting a bit weird because they are worried you don't have enough support and feel bad that they can't provide it all themselves. What do you think?
Re: Feeling alone
I saw one a while ago and we just never corrected and I always said to myself I don't want to see one again. I just don't feel comfortable!
I know she is worried about me she has stated that but she has never acted like this before and I'm worried that sooner or later she will just walk away. And I just want to tell her how I feel but I don't know how to express it.
She has a lot going on in her life at the moment and I feel like I'm making things worse
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