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Feeling like I am sinking

Hi everyone,

I have not posted in here a while but have been meaning to do so. However, I feel like now is time I need to talk on here again. I guess the best way describe how I am feeling and going is feeling like I am sinking or standing in quicksand. The past year has been quite rough because I am receiving mixed results at university, my dad got assaulted by my neighbor's son in law and rejection from women and friends . It has caused me to lose confidence in myself and feel like I am being misunderstood by people. I will admit good things have happened to me, but they feel minor compared to the negative going ons in my life. The thing is making it hard for me find myself and connect others. I have noticed my trust issues in people are starting to arise again and my faith in people/myself. I use to want to be a police officer, but I am not too sure now! It just feels like I can only receive positive attention from women when I pay them because I go to strip clubs and have only had physical contact with sex workers. It feels like my friends do not have time for me or feel like I am bother to be around. It just hurts! It also hurts because I thought I was over this!      

Re: Feeling like I am sinking

Hey @GentleGiant, I don't think I've been around long enough to see you when you posted last, so hey there!

I noticed how you said that the past year in particular has been quite hard for you. I know how horrible it can feel when it's not just one bad thing happening - it feels like a chain of events that you'd be able to handle separately but not all together. I think when that pulls together it can really make whole periods of time feel really shitty. Is that how you're feeling about the past year at the moment?

Re: Feeling like I am sinking

Hi there,

I think that is best way to describe it! It feels like everything hit all at once. I am worried that I am going to fail at university and get kicked out. I am not happy with where I am living, but I will have to make it do! It just really frustrates me our next door neighbor's son in law is abusive because I can hear him yelling at his kids and no one is doing anything about it! I openly admit I have forced some issues on myself by seeing strippers and going to sex workers, but it feels like that will be the only way I will get that kind of interaction with women.   

Re: Feeling like I am sinking

Hey @GentleGiant, it seems like there's 3 main issues that are on your mind at the moment. To me (and I could be wrong - please tell me if I am!), I'm sensing a lot of concern about (a) your university grades, (b) your next door neighbor's son-in-law and (c) your interaction with strippers and sex workers and how that relates to how you feel about yourself. Am I on the right track here?

This is just something that's popped into my head, but with your neighbor's son in law and his violent tendencies/yelling at his kids - have you ever tried talking to the council about it, or is it something that you would be able to do where you live? I had a problem a few months ago with my neighbor's noise levels and we made a complaint and it was actually a very swift and helpful service. I could only imagine how distressing it would be to live next to somebody who you know is violent and noisy, but would that be an option that you think could ease the situation somewhat? I know that you can submit complaints anonymously, so that may help if you're not too keen on confronting someone that unpredictable directly.

Re: Feeling like I am sinking

You have pretty much hit the nail head! However, with my neighbor's son in law it is supposedly 'under control' by my neighbor (It isn't). We almost got him charged for assaulting my dad, but my neighbor stepped in and said he would keep them (his daughter as well) under control and they were supposed to move out! In other words, both have not happened!  I have spoken to my psychologist and he suggested calling child services, but if anything happened they would know who called. If I confronted him it would more than likely turn physical because he coward punched my dad and hit him on the ground! I wouldn't let that happen to me! It is tough with that particular issue.  

Re: Feeling like I am sinking

hi @GentleGiant, sounds like you're in a sticky situation with your neighbour. How are you feeling today?Heart


Re: Feeling like I am sinking

Hi honky,

I apologies for the late response. I am going okay. I think I just needed somewhere to talk and open up. I do see a psychologist but that is only once a month. I use to talk to my dad all the time but he we don't have much private spaces where we live and he is busy working. The situation with next door is tricky one, but that will only sort it self out if one of us moves sadly. 

Re: Feeling like I am sinking

Hey @GentleGiant, I totally understand how frustrating it must be to have that situation with your neighbour at the moment. It's really hard when there's little that you can do about a situation without causing drama, as I feel like it always boils down to thinking that it's not worth the fuss, even though it really concerns someone. Do you feel like his behavior is something that could get out of hand or escalate in the near future?

I also noticed how you feel that university (and mainly your university performance) is affecting your mental health in a pretty bad way. Do you mind telling me a bit more about what's involved in that? Such as what you're studying and if it's problems with assignment structure or timetabling/due dates, etc.

Re: Feeling like I am sinking

No need to apologise @GentleGiant. I'm glad to hear that you're feeling okay. Please feel free to talk and open up whenever you feel, we are all here to listen Heart


How are you finding your psychologist? 

Re: Feeling like I am sinking

Hey @GentleGiant, I'm glad you're back on the forums and I hope we're able to offer you some support. Is seeing your psychologist more regularly an option?

// Spiral outward, keep going. //