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Going through a hard time currently

At 22 years of age, isn’t this meant to be the time when I’m enjoying life most? For someone who suffers from depression, life can have its high and low points, which can be pretty close together.

Currently, my life is going through a lot of changes- changing homes for the first time in my life in the coming weeks among many other things. The ‘depression’ levels have increased quite a lot over the past couple of months, not due to changing homes by any stretch, but other circumstances have led to this. I can’t say a lot about what’s gone on though in this type of medium. Unfortunately, nothing much I can do about those circumstances to change anything.

Due to these massive changes, I’m always thinking about what’s happening, why it’s happening and so on. Smiles have become the facade that’s nothing’s wrong, although that’s definitely not the case. At work, I’ve experienced a few times where I’m surrounded by people but feel so lonely and isolated. That’s one of the hardest bits of everything. Feeling as though no one is there to help and that I have to keep things bottled up.

For those that know me, I try, and would hope that most people agree, to be the best human being I can be. Over the past few years, I’ve raised in excess of $40,000 for mental health charities and been nominated and won awards for this charity work. I started because I wanted to help others with depression but the real reason is because I wanted to help myself. I wanted that feeling as though I was doing something to help.

Two quotes sum it up best for me regarding depression and those are:

– “No it doesn’t work that way. I can’t wake up one day and say oh, I want to be happy and be happy. It doesn’t work that way.”
– “People say you can’t be sad or depressed because people have it worse than you. People also have it better than you. Does that mean you can’t ever be happy?”

Thanks to those who have read through this. It’s only a glimpse into my thoughts currently but at least you’ve taken the time out to care, so thanks. I don’t normally publicise my thoughts but I wanted to this time.

Re: Going through a hard time currently

@arsenal_fan_92 you probably have heard this many times but I think you are a hero and amazing. The good deeds you have done to help others will come back and reward you. It doesnt matter if you did it to help yourself also. I can learn a great deal from you and have been contemplating exactly how do I start a charity drive. Though this isnt the forum to do so Id love to learn from you.

 

The thing with depression and other chronic illness is that there will always be ups and downs. You have come to the right place, the people here are amazing and we will be here to listen to you whenever. Its good to develop what I call "tools" to help you cope with difficult times but always remember you will come back up again. I promise you that. 

 

In the mean time talk to your GP and friends. I find a counsellor really helpful because they "have to" listen to you. Maybe seek one out or go back again. 

 

At 22 you have done more for the world than I have at 33. Gosh I cant express how proud of you I am. 

 

Take care and let us know how you are going.

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Re: Going through a hard time currently

  Hi @arsenal_fan_92 . Firstly, well done with all the work you've done for charity - really awesome stuff! Regardless of whether you did it for yourself or not, you still did it and I'm sure it was very beneficial for both you and those you were helping.

 

I'm sorry to hear you are having a hard time right now.  Well done on being so brave and trying to cope! However, sometimes it can be really helpful to talk to someone about what you're feeling.  Is there anyone you can talk to about the things that are bothering you?  If you are feeling alone you could always check out eheadspaceBeyondBlue and Black Dog Institute are also some really great places to look for help.  Also, here is a fact sheet about some self help strategies

 

Going through a lot of changes at once can sometimes be really difficult.  Is there an activity you could use for a bit of mental rejuvenation and stability? Perhaps going for a run, keeping a journal or spending some time listening to your favourite music?

 

Life can get us all down sometimes (regardless of your age) but don't feel like you have to struggle through your problems alone.  Stay strong and let us know how you are going. 

 

Re: Going through a hard time currently

Hey @arsenal_fan_92 - I like the quotes you put at the end. That's the things about depression isn't it - it's an illness. So regardless of the circumstances around you (moving etc) - you still feel the symptoms of depression. It's just that with your illness, changes etc can just antagonise the situation as you've got less energy up your sleeve to deal with change than the person without depression.

I thought this info might be good for you?
http://au.reachout.com/building-better-coping-skills

 

Hope to keep seeing you around the forums.

Online Community Manager

ReachOut.com

Re: Going through a hard time currently

Hey @arsenal_fan_92 

Holy moly- you have raised so much money for mental health!! 

Its people like you that keep sites like this and mental health services afloat!!!! 

 

So now its our turn to thank you for everything you have done and show you how much it means to everyone,

This fact sheet will be good for the moving process - dealing with life changes 

This fact sheet will be good general coping skills- Coping skills 

 

Is there anything else we can help you with?

 

E

 

Re: Going through a hard time currently

Thank you to those who've said such nice things. It means a lot to have people there who know what I'm going through and are so supportive!!

Re: Going through a hard time currently

Hey @arsenal_fan_92 

Those quotes you gave at the end are so insightful Smiley Happy

It's amazing that through your charity work, you found a way to help yourself while helping others - that's really inspirational.

 

There isn't really a set age at which you have to enjoy life most from my perspective. At any age, we will experience joys and also face challenges so there isn't pressure on you to be the happiest you can be at 22. The best is yet to come Smiley Happy

Re: Going through a hard time currently

I'm glad you liked the quotes. I felt they were relevant.

I agree there's no age where you are meant to be happiest but when you're young, you're meant to be free, somewhat reckless in making mistakes and stuff. I feel so limited in what I can do. By that I mean, I'm very introverted and not like many other kids my age who go out partying on weekends and doing things many kids my age do.

Re: Going through a hard time currently

Is it possible that maybe your 'best years' wil come a biit later @arsenal_fan_92 ?

 

I hear you when you say that we're told all the time that our twenties are supposed to be the best time of our lives but as someone that has had their twenties I totally preferred my thirties.

 

Maybe your ppersonality is better suited to slightly more mature years?

Re: Going through a hard time currently

Yes I think you're right that maybe my personality is suited to slightly older/more mature people.

And yes I hope you're right that my best years are still to come. It's a hard one in that no age period is necessary your best but you hope that each day/year/decade has the massive highs.