Hi @Level01... it sounds like you're really going through a rough time right now. The lack of motivation, isolation, sadness and feeling stretched sounds a lot like some depression. How long have you been feeling this way? Do you think you could talk to a professional about it? Even Kids Helpline (1800 55 1800)?
A lot of people think we are being selfish when we are putting ourselves first but the truth is we are self soothing and filling our cup before we can look after other people. I really urge you to keep going with this self care. Sooner or later people will realise what you are doing and they will see it is for the best. Perhaps you are feeling so bad because you haven't been able to engage in proper self care? It is really worth putting your time into it.
It would be really good to change one small thing in your day so you're not feeling too pressured. Something like eating a piece of fruit or going outside for some stretches and sun first thing in the morning? Do you think you could add some small self care goals to your day?
Keeping a journal is also a good way of keeping track of how you are feeling and seeing if the positive changes are helping. Also, it usually helps getting all of the horrible feelings out of us and onto paper!