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Hello

Hi,

 

I feel alone and I feel like nobody wants to hear me. 

 

I know I am very overweight and extremely ugly, I have to put up with it myself every day of my life. I hate the way I walk, talk and I am dumb in everything I do. 

 

I feel weak, alone, misunderstood, ugly, sad, confused and a burden on everyone. I feel confused as I got no idea where I want to work. I feel stupid and sad because my grandma has cancer and I haven’t seen her, all I have done is make her miserable, I want to talk to her which I can’t do it through a phone call, because at that moment I don’t want to say and I don't know if she wants to talk to me.

 

My parents never show me affection, they never hug me, or give me a proper response to my special moments or properly spend time with me or they are never satisfied with whatever I do. They avoid me. I don't have a strong relationship with anyone. I have no close friends either.

 

I know how it feels when you have an ugly face and everyone treats you differently, when you aren’t good enough, when you want to spend more time with your family. When each day feels like a struggle when you have to put on this mask showing that you are alright and hideaway that vulnerable and bottled up inner self and emotions.

 

Maybe I am overreacting because so many other people go through worse things than me, but this is how I feel.

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Re: Hello

Hi @HelloHi 

 

There are people here who want to listen, myself included.

It sounds like there's a huge amount going on for you... it doesn't sound like you're overreacting at all.

 

I'm sorry that people treat you differently because of how you look, that's really not fair...

Do you think it would be more helpful for you to find ways of coping with other people's opinions, or changing how you see your own body?

 

Have you ever thought about seeing a professional to help you find ways to cope with or change these feelings?

 

 

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Re: Hello

aw @HelloHi - it sounds like you're experiencing some pretty heavy thoughts there Smiley Sad...I'm really glad that you've shared it with us. Expressing how you feel can be quite cathartic. Plus, as @Tiny_leaf mentioned, we're always here to listen.

 

How do you feel after writing some of that down?

 

It sounds like you're thinking some pretty difficult thoughts - I imagine it must be hard to think things such as "I'm ugly, I hate myself, I'm unattractive, I'm a burden, I'm weak, my grandma doesn't want to talk to me, my parents avoid me, I don't have a good relationship with anyone."

 

You mention that you may be overreacting, but from what you've described, what you're going through at the moment sounds tough and deserves attention. I'm glad you've reached out to us. I'm curious to know about your professional support network - whether you have one at all or whether you'd be open to getting professional support. 

 

Also, I noticed that you mentioned only negative things about yourself. Can you tell me some positives, or some things that you like about yourself?

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Re: Hello

Hi @HelloHi. Both @Maddy-RO and @Tiny_leaf mentioned some really good things. I definitely would also love to hear some positive things you have to say about yourself (as I'm sure there are many). 

I think its really important to know that you are extremely validated to feel the way you do. You're not overreacting at all, your emotions are valid! 

Have you tried speaking to people about this feeling? It could be beneficial to maybe open up to your parents or some friends about what you're going through, definitely helps when there are people around supporting you. If you don't feel comfortable with that, I hope you know that you can voice how you feel openly on this platform without any judgments. 

I really empathize with not feeling like anyone wants to hear you but please remember that I and so many other people want to hear you. <3

 

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Re: Hello

Hi @Tiny_leaf 

Thank you for your support. 

 

Sorry I don't really know what will be helpful

 

My school counsellor does talk to me sometimes. 

 

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Re: Hello

Hi @Maddy-RO 

Thank you for understanding

 

My school counsellor talks to me sometimes. I don't think I am ready to reach out to anyone else.

 

I don't like anything about myself. So I have no positives. Sorry

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Re: Hello

Hi @letsheal 

Thank you for your kindness. 

 

I am not ready to talk to my parents and I don't have any close friends, sorry.

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Re: Hello

@HelloHi You don't need to apologize to me!

Good on you for taking the step and voicing how you felt on this platform. It's a big step expressing what's going on for you. 

I am curious if you have considered speaking to a healthcare professional though? I know for myself when I was going through a really rough time and didn't have any close friends nor felt comfortable talking to my parents, being able to speak to someone really helped me with what I was going through. 

 

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Re: Hello

@HelloHi that's okay.

We have an activity thing going on about body positivity, would you like me to tag you into that so you can look around?

 

I'm sorry that you can't find anything positive...

I'm sure there are lots if things, but it can be hard to see them in yourself...

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Re: Hello

Hi @letsheal,
Thank you. Smiley Happy

I don't think I am ready to talk to a healthcare professional. I think I need more time.