Hello
Hi,
I feel alone and I feel like nobody wants to hear me.
I know I am very overweight and extremely ugly, I have to put up with it myself every day of my life. I hate the way I walk, talk and I am dumb in everything I do.
I feel weak, alone, misunderstood, ugly, sad, confused and a burden on everyone. I feel confused as I got no idea where I want to work. I feel stupid and sad because my grandma has cancer and I haven’t seen her, all I have done is make her miserable, I want to talk to her which I can’t do it through a phone call, because at that moment I don’t want to say and I don't know if she wants to talk to me.
My parents never show me affection, they never hug me, or give me a proper response to my special moments or properly spend time with me or they are never satisfied with whatever I do. They avoid me. I don't have a strong relationship with anyone. I have no close friends either.
I know how it feels when you have an ugly face and everyone treats you differently, when you aren’t good enough, when you want to spend more time with your family. When each day feels like a struggle when you have to put on this mask showing that you are alright and hideaway that vulnerable and bottled up inner self and emotions.
Maybe I am overreacting because so many other people go through worse things than me, but this is how I feel.
I am glad that you have cool lecturers and tutors. I understand what you mean about attachment. Sometimes you have teachers where you can just be your complete self and don't have to change. Your right about High school teachers being open and having a rapport. with their class. With high school teachers, I guess there is more communication. I am sorry you feel detached to your uni teachers.
Haha, you are so right about my English teacher. 🙂
Hope you are doing well and I am really sorry for late replies.
Noo that's okay, feel free to take your time replying to posts (AND you don't even have to reply if a post makes you uncomfortable, etc.!). There's no pressure on the forums, and we want you to feel like this is a safe place! 🙂
How have you been traveling lately Hey-Hello-Hi? 😛
You are right about high school teachers. Haha, 'I don't want to be attached to my uni professors' that made me laugh 🙂
Thank you for understanding. I use ReachOut on my laptop as I can't use it on my phone as my parents would see. So it takes me some time to reply on here. Sorry.
Its been the usual. Tired, have a headache and feeling low.
But how have you been travelling?
Lol Hey-Hello-Hi 🤣
I'm glad that you are doing okay. 🙂 How has today been for you?
I don't have a quiet place to work, atm I am behind in school. The past days haven't been great. There is so much work from school its overwhelming. I have been feeling a bit low lately and my mind feels really heavy and full, it's hard to concentrate and think. I don't know what is going on, but it feels suffocating.
I'm sorry you feel lonely at school 😞 What do you mean you're an extra? Do you feel invisible? 😞 Have your friends said they don't like you or indicated otherwise?
I'm doing okay today thanks for checking in 🙂
Sorry for taking so long to reply. I have been sick and came back from the hospital a week ago.
I haven't tried mindfulness before.
I feel like an extra, because my friends hardly talk to me, whenever I talk to them, they don't really care or ignore because I don't go to places with them nor we have much in common. They would only care or talk to me, if their other friends were absent.
I have one friend who doesn't do that, but she has other friends that are much better than me.
I haven't been able to reach out to any supports.
Thank you @Lost_Space_Explorer5 for being here. 🙂
Hey @HelloHi, it's really good to hear back from you. I'm sorry to hear you've been sick and in hospital, I hope you're feeling better now? Would you be willing to give mindfulness a try? That sounds really hard that your friends don't talk to you very much 😞 It sounds like there is one friend who is more supportive and it's more your own thoughts of comparing yourself to their other friends that are making you feel down? Perhaps you could talk to them about this?
I'm sorry to hear you haven't been able to reach out to any supports, that must be very isolating 😞
You're welcome, we're always here to listen 🙂
Hi @Lost_Space_Explorer5 , @Tiny_leaf
How have you been going?
Hope you and your families are doing well. 🙂
May every day be filled with wellness, smiles, laughter, happiness, love and kindness.
Hi @HelloHi
Oops it looks like that glitch has come up again, @Lost_Space_Explorer5 may not have got a notification for your last post...
Aww, thank you and I hope the same for you.
I'm getting a puppy soon!!
How are you going?
That's amazing that you are getting a puppy!!!!!!! 🙂
I am going ok, remote learning is hard though.
How are you going?
@HelloHi I'm going pretty good!
Yeah I heard remote learning can cause a lot of problems for some people...
I hope things settle down soon.
I am glad that you are doing pretty good! 🙂
How has today been for you?
I don't like going to school with other people because going to school is pretty lonely and my friends don't like me, I am an extra. At home, its hard because there is so much work, there is more work than it is in school, lol.
that's really tough @HelloHi, are there any activities or things that make you feel better when you are feeling the low that you mentioned?
Hey @HelloHi , I'm so sorry to hear you're feeling like that - often if we're a bit depressed, we can lose our enjoyment for the stuff we used to love, and it doesn't mean that you're boring. Is there anything that gives you joy at the moment? There's a lot of lovely, welcoming people here who are around for a chat 🙂
I don't think there is anything that will give me joy.
To be honest I am tired and I don't really want to try anymore.
But thank you for your compassion and kindness. 🙂
I will look at the activities calendar. 🙂
@HelloHi well you have the forums now.
It doesn't sound like you're boring. Just tired. And having people around you acting like that and thinking all those horrible things about yourself sounds pretty tiring.
I'm tired too, and it does mean that my life is pretty uneventful. But sometimes that's okay. Sometimes you need time to rest.
Because when people are too tired to do exciting stuff, often it means that there's a lot going on in the background.
Oh you used to play basketball?
I used to do netball, even though I was bad at catching, and throwing, and running. I have no idea how I managed 
Thank you for your kind words.
I guess you are right about life being uneventful and that being ok. 🙂
I really sorry that you are tired too.
Netball is fun. I bet you were amazing at netball!
I thought I might just pop in and add that it is okay to not feel ready. It is completely your choice around when you need to see a professional, and if you think you need a bit more time to make the next step, then feel free to give yourself more time. You will find that the support will be more helpful for you when you are feeling comfortable and ready to receive it. Hopefully you will feel a bit more comfortable and ready soon!@HelloHi Okay, I've tagged you. You should see it in your notifications. 
@HelloHi You don't need to apologize to me!
Good on you for taking the step and voicing how you felt on this platform. It's a big step expressing what's going on for you.
I am curious if you have considered speaking to a healthcare professional though? I know for myself when I was going through a really rough time and didn't have any close friends nor felt comfortable talking to my parents, being able to speak to someone really helped me with what I was going through.
