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I feel like everyone at school hates me

Firstly let me say that my extra curricular outside school are FANTASTIC at the moment, really no complaints there. I've met so many great people so far that I'm feeling confident about my dream career again.

 

But school is slowly sinking for me more and more as time goes on.

 

I feel like everyone hates me. I feel like no enjoys talking to me, enjoys my company and only suffer through talking to me. I really have no close friends

 

Is it because my eccentricity comes across annoying? Am I just too quiet at times and therefore look disinterested?  I don't know

 

I'm just so lonely at school that it's starting to make me teary eyed at times, I hope the psychologist next month helps

Re: I feel like everyone at school hates me

I feel you Smiley Tongue

 

But im quiet the opposite, I'm very loud and people tend to say that i'm annoying. And i swear everyone hates me as well! Honestly, me and one girl would not get along and i feel like she tells shit about me to everyone. 

 

But honestly don't worry about it, like me, you are just a bit paroniod of the people around you. You think they hate you but they don't and some people are just too afraid to get close to you. They are scared that you might not what to talk to them and sometimes just sitting next to someone quiet and saying 'hi' is a good idea. you might get a new friend Smiley Happy AND if you are positive no one likes you, well then you have us <3 keep your head up Heart

Re: I feel like everyone at school hates me

Hi@MemphisBelle 

 

Glad to hear your extra curricular activities are going well Smiley Happy

 

The fact that those activities are going well, but your school activities are not,  makes me wonder if its a contextual thing.

 

Perhaps you feel comfortable and in your element in your out of school activities but feel a bit uncomfortable in your school environment. 

 

Maybe this is causing you to judge yourself, and perhaps even reject yourself before others have the chance.

 

I want to encourage to give yourself a bit of self-love, and people are likely to feel a more positive vibe from you....and everyone is drawn to genuine positivity.

 

By the way, how long have you been havin these feelings for? as I assume you have been at this school for some years now?

 

p.s Goodjob booking a psychologist! I think it will be helpful

 

 

Re: I feel like everyone at school hates me

@Troy I've been at this school since 2010, I was always the odd one out but never minded it. I was the kid who loved collecting old VHS tapes and made mixed cassette tapes.

2011 was a bad year, I had a horrible attitude and got bullied because of it.

2012, I stayed quiet and out of any spotlight realising I had been jerk.

2013, okay.

2014 my meltdowns started leading me to where I am now.

 

I just at times look like the guy who's Waaaayy to happy about stuff. Even little things that people wouldn't normally get exicted about. I kinda get laughed at for being weird and eccentric and the "party animal" (Though I refuse to drink alochol and have never been to party, but I thinks thats meant to be a ironic joke)

I don't want to go to formal as I know I will be made fun of or the graduation assembly.

 

I have no real social life or friends, a few volutneer acting shows here and there but nothing else

 

Getting accepted to do a clowning gig at an elderly home is the most exicting news in the world for me.

Re: I feel like everyone at school hates me

A clowning gig, that's awesome! Glad to hear your world outside of school is going well @MemphisBelle  - you've done some great work on growing that area of your life and you should be proud of your accomplishments. Also, well done on reaching out for extra support and making an appointment with your psychologist. What sort of things are you hoping they can help you with? Don't forget to tell them if there is a particular area you need help with, like coping techniques for social situations.

Re: I feel like everyone at school hates me

@ElleBelle 

With the psychologist,

Firstly I just want someone to understand how I feel. I'm lonely and hate myself for not having friends.

Secondly, maybe offer some advice on ways I can supress my eccentric behaviour

and Thirdly, just general advice

 

The clowning gigs should be fun, I'll be acting and modeling as well

Re: I feel like everyone at school hates me

hey @MemphisBelle 

Im sorry to hear you have been feeling lonely at school

It is however good to hear that outside of school activities are going well Smiley Happy Are these after school with school people activities or independent from school all together activities?

 

You say you have met great people at your extra curricular activies, do they go to your school? Maybe you can try and hang out with them more, in or out of school if they arent at your school. You have met great people and had a great time - see! Its proof that you are likable and able to have friends!

 

At school I had a small handful of friends who understood me or was cool with me being an arty weirdo. I had loads of friends outside of school who were different ages  but had a lot of similar interests as i did - i met them mostly going to local all ages gigs. I was pretty content at school with just my one good friend because I realised that just because the people at school didnt get me didnt mean I wasnt cool - i had all these people outside of school being my friend!

 

Sometimes when you are different or like different things to the mainstream kids it can be hard because the amount of people who are into the same stuff as you is smaller and then the amount of people who are into the same stuff as you annnddddd happen to go to your school is smaller still! This doesnt mean you arent awesome though Smiley Happy it just means that in your school of however many hundred kids and in your class of however many dozen kids there arent many that are into many things you are into..but out there in the big wide world there are heaaaaaaaps of people who have similar interests to you and are likeminded cool people that you can get to know one day!

 

I found that school got easier for me when  I stopped caring what people thought about me. Im not sure if thinking that my attitude changed but it felt like once I stopped caring people didnt bother to give me a hard time about anything anymore...

 

Re: I feel like everyone at school hates me

Hey memphis, some good replies here - just wanted to jump in and say hang in there. You've come so far and done a lot of great work on your mental health and well being.

Just an idea I had after I was thinking about the how way that we talk about things influences they way we think about them, as well as vice versa. So maybe think about the way that you frame things - like for example the heading of this thread - that 'everyone' at your school "hates" you. That is a LOT of people with some very strong emotions.

I often talk in absolutes like that too, so I get it - and maybe your feelings are strong so it feels big.

But make sure you challenge your negative thinking! I can see that you are trying and it's wonderful to see you include some of the things that are going well in your life, as well as some ideas for what you can do about it.

Keep up the good work

Online Community Manager

ReachOut.com

Re: I feel like everyone at school hates me

@Sophie-RO 

I do see the new psychologist in a month. Just really lonely at the moment, I think that's really my problem at the moment. Whilst you are more than likely right that not EVERYONE hates me, I don't have any really close friends either.

 

In response to @hartley_ None of the people are from school. They are new faces who don't know me at all. I feel like I'm doing okay with them. I got a random message from one of them saying "Thank you for volunteering" without me even writing anything, so I hope that it goes well.

 

 P.S I might pop by that "inner bully" chat tonight as that is something I do A LOT

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Re: I feel like everyone at school hates me

@MemphisBelle  I dont necessarily think you should express your 'eccentric' self. whats more important is that you are being the person you want to be, rather then sacrifising who you really are to please others. This doesnt mean you can't work on self-improvement.

 

But I reckon its really important to value and care for yourself. When you like yourself, people will sense this innate value about you and be attracked to it.

 

If your speak negative and don't like yourself, I feel that people will sense this as well. 

 

Your mind thinks in pictures, and negations dont mean anything. So if you think I dont want to be lonely, all you are visualising and communicating to your mind is the concept of lonelyness, and thats probably going to make you feel unhappy.

 

If you make it a habit of focusing on positive things and trying to not let negative self-talk take over as @Sophie-RO  mentioned you will be in a good place to start.

 

If you have spare time take up some hobbies! I remember in high school if I met someone the first thing I wanted to know was, what kind of music they like,  and did they play basketball, guitar or skateboard. Oh something that people always loved in later high school is that I did kickboxing. Take up some of these activities people will ask you about them!