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I feel lonely-I don't know who to talk to

So I recently moved into university, its technically my second year, but I was off campus the first year. I'm making friends and all, but sometimes I just want someone to talk to, to a more personal level. The people I trust the most are overseas. I'm scared of driving people away too. If someone asks me how I am, I can tell them I'm sleepy, my sleepiness and tiredness is apparent. 


I have my first appointment with clinical psych on Tusday.  

Re: I feel lonely-I don't know who to talk to

Hey Creativegirl12


Getting into Uni can be tricky at first, moving into anything new has its challenges. I totally understand, when I first started at Uni I felt pretty lonely as well. It was hard for the first couple of weeks, new atmosphere and didn't really know anyone.


You will get to know your peers better as time moves on. Just show an interest in the people you meet, ask simple questions about them and you will build friendships. 


I wouldn't worry about driving people away, most people are probably in the same boat as you. Don't really know that many people, but are curious and keen to get to know people.


Hang in there, because it wont take that long to get settled in and making friends will be simple Smiley Happy

Re: I feel lonely-I don't know who to talk to

Also, would it be possible for you to be able to Skype with your overseas friends/family?


It might be not be the best, but it might offer you some comfort and support while things are still coming together at Uni.

Re: I feel lonely-I don't know who to talk to

Hey @Creativegirl12 

Sorry that you are feeling lonely! It would be hard moving somewhere new and meeting new people

But it could turn out to be excitingSmiley Very Happy Who knows who you will meet!

As Nath has said, chat to people and ask questions, get to know them, arrange to have lunch together or study sometime

Im sure a lot of people who have also just moved have the same problem, they could be waiting for someone else to make the first move

I found that when I first started uni I didnt know anyone and was too scared to say hi or sit with someone and I really kept to myself. After a few classes, people started to relax a bit and were talking to people and I even made a few friends and I thought to myself, if I had only just said a simple hi to someone in my class or someone id seen round a bit, I could of made even more friends and sooner too!
You could also join a club or sport team at uni, get to know people that way, it can be easier because you already have a common interest to start talking about


Is there an art club or writing group ? Is there other things you are interested in that there might be a club/team/activity for at uni?



Re: I feel lonely-I don't know who to talk to

I've made friends, and I can continue expanding my social network. Sometimes I feel lonely, because sometimes you just need that friend who can help you through the days you feel terrible. I don't know if it's too much to ask for. I don't if it is selfish, but I feel as though that's what I'm missing.

I know it takes time to strengthen friendship. But if I were to be open about my mood disorder, what are the chances they will leave?

I'm keep in touch with my family and friends through the net. It's not the same, but it's better than nothing.

Re: I feel lonely-I don't know who to talk to

What you're asking for isn't selfish, it is nice to have a person in our lives that we can talk personally with. 


Well you won't know what might happen, it's not possible to control another persons actions or how they will react if you do something. 


What I would like to suggest is to approach one of these people that you have met, and simply say "hey I've been feeling a bit lonely recently coming to Uni, it's a new thing for me and I'm not used to it yet. Do you ever get the same feeling?"


Just try talk about the way you're feeling, and who knows maybe they are experiencing the same thing or at least have at some point. I really doubt people are going to leave simply because you told them about your feelings towards Uni. That might be a better starting point.


Alternatively, there might be a councillor that you can talk to at the Uni. You could go and talk to them about your issue as well, and you might be able to get more personal and feel comfortable as you can be sure they're not going to turn you away. That might be something you can consider while you're still building up your friendship network. 

Re: I feel lonely-I don't know who to talk to

I'm feeling pretty insecure at the moment. I already self-stigmitise myself enough. I don't need additional pressure. I'm a little sensitive at the moment. I prefer the other me over this me. My identity feels broken. Maybe because I swing up and down, it becomes a part of me.

I'm seeing the clinical psych for the first time on Tuesday too.

Re: I feel lonely-I don't know who to talk to

I relapsed after almost a year. Even though my [self harm was minimal] its still something.


Re: I feel lonely-I don't know who to talk to

Hi Creativegirl12,

I'm sorry to hear you're having a rough time at the moment and you feel like you're not doing so well.

Really glad to hear you have the clinical psych appt later in the week. Will you be okay until then??

Please if you need to call Kids Helpline on 1800 55 1800.

Try not to be too hard on yourself, none of us a perfect. Be kind to yourself Smiley Happy

Take care,

Re: I feel lonely-I don't know who to talk to

Hey @Creativegirl12 , how are you today?