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Re: I feel terrible about my own identity.

Hi @BunnyWalks!

I was wondering what some of your hobbies are? Smiley Happy 

I've met some of my great friends through doing activities that I am really interested in like dancing and anime! Universities have tons of clubs which tend to foster welcoming and friendly environments. 

Please keep us updated on how you go! 


Re: I feel terrible about my own identity.

Right now im into sports like marathons , cycling and surfing.

However these have impaired my communication and social development. Smiley Sad

i thought of taking part in Art again like acting and writing which have insightful thoughts when sophisticated methods are used to mirror issues in the modern world but the world has always been on fire and im afraid of being class into a faction and baited into unnecessary and hurtful arguments.

Bojack horseman for example.

and fear for my lively hood if anyone from home found out my cultural background . it is silly but authorities (JAKIM) at home have such high influence over personal expression . while i can handle disagreements over what is funny and what isnt , its the threats i can't stand.

i wouldn't be okay if anyone i cared about was abused the way i was.

eg if i somewhat say i enjoy masturbating as a joke . if it hurts someones political interest whom i did not attached it to i could be in deep trouble for promoting poor conduct.

I'm just unsure of the consequences and who could assist me if i were to be public about it.

University is bountiful for company but id like to think i'd want something with more quality down the road.
large quantity can leave me being thoughtless at times.

would you show me a thread that has similar concerns @missep fear and putting quality in friendships ?

Re: I feel terrible about my own identity.


Thank you for sharing your hobbies! Are there any cycling groups near you?

If you decided to take part in art again, do you think you would be open to trying it even though you have some hesitations? 

For me quality of a friendship is so much more important that quantity! There's a saying: 'I would rather a deep pond than a shallow ocean' 


In terms of threads I think I might need some help finding some for you @BunnyWalks

 @letitgo @May_ do you guys happen to know of any threads for fear and putting quality in friendships for @BunnyWalks? I had a quick look but I'm not sure if I found anything relevant Smiley Sad 

Re: I feel terrible about my own identity.

Hey @BunnyWalks @missep I don't know of any threads with that focus in particular, but you could certainly start one?


would you be able to clarify how sports like marathons, cycling, surfing etc has impaired your communication? I'm just a bit confused by that and would love to talk more about it Smiley Happy


you say you'd fear for your livelihood - are you safe where you are?

// Spiral outward, keep going. //

Re: I feel terrible about my own identity.


Well being born a political and religious crime there's pressure is on me to conform to my culture. Part of my art is spilling my worries to a live crowd. i don't know how be proud and modest when it comes to performing comedy which is an exaggerated art form.

I'm open to trying it.

Also missep, im curious on your thoughts over what is a quality friend. I meet people frequently at Uni but everyone's sailing their own course.

Re: I feel terrible about my own identity.


Hi letitgo, sports like marathons,cycling and surfing.

Certainly I've made a few friends from surfing. However being an international im unsure how to lead a conversation in this country. in context I'm a guest hence unsure how "Loose " or "respectful" i should be in this country it kills me to tell them i don't share the same liberties they do and i develop an inferior complex.

Marathons, cycling were very repetitive sports that i did on my own initiative. However i noticed without balances i came off as arrogant and a some what self absorbed when it came to conversation.

In my home country we live a sedentary life style and sports were very encouraged. However our conversations werent all that cultured.

Re: I feel terrible about my own identity.

hey @letitgo

I'm safe in australia but with the publicity you get from claiming an islamic origin/influence i dont think i cant handle harsh rejection and/or rapid questioning from members of the public.

wouldnt want to be exploited by the media for their story and get patronizing sympathy.

Apostasy is not acceptable in Malay-muslim culture they recommend you'd repent with help from the state.
Today i realized and accepted that i am culturally oppressed and being around euro-australians or "white" i have been known to be too intense or those matters dont apply in our conversation . i denied it all this time because i wanted to look strong and adaptable.

what do you think ?

Re: I feel terrible about my own identity.

Ah, I see. Thank you for explaining that @BunnyWalks, and I'm glad you've made a few friends through surfing! Smiley Happy

// Spiral outward, keep going. //

Re: I feel terrible about my own identity.

Do you mean you're culturally oppressed by other people in Australia @BunnyWalks?


Also, thank you for teaching me a new word! I had to Google "apostasy" and now I know what it means Smiley Happy

// Spiral outward, keep going. //

Re: I feel terrible about my own identity.

i needed this encouraging thought.

Smiley Happy