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I keep dreaming about my ex

its been 8 years since my boyfriend and i broke up , it might sound crazy or unrealistic but since i broke up with him i have never dated or even touch any other guy So yess i have been single for past 8 years i dont know why i keep dreaming about him every 2-3 days he keeps popping in my dream in a way that i cant ignore it and keep crying when i wake up ! I had a good relationship and when we were dating i got pregnant and things turned bad to worse i was dealing with all the crap while i was pregnant but at the end i end up losing my baby and after that it went down heel we broke up too . Do you think this is normal


Re: I keep dreaming about my ex

Hi @paynecaitlyn, that sounds so difficult.


That doesn't sound crazy at all.


I noticed that the link you put in for dreaming goes to a website about symbolism, is that how he's coming up in your dreams?


And I don't know what "normal" is if I'm honest..

I still sometimes dream about my ex a year on, but our relationship wasn't as involved, I guess, as yours, and it only lasted about a year, so there's probably not much comparison there...


Do you have any professional supports at all? They may be able to help you process and understand all of this. 

If dream analysis is something you find useful, maybe a psycho-dynamic therapist is worth looking into, as I think that a lot of their work involves dreams. 

Re: I keep dreaming about my ex

Hi @paynecaitlyn,


Welcome to the ReachOut Forums and thank you for courageously sharing your experiences with us Heart It sounds like your ex was a really important person in your life and has left a lasting impact Heart


When someone goes through something so heartbreaking like losing a pregnancy and a partner, it can have such a long lasting impact on wellbeing, thoughts and more generally life. It is completely understandable that you are still dreaming about him- dreaming/sleep is one of the ways our brains process memory, feelings and grief. Sometimes when dreams keep recurring, it can indicate that there is something your mind is still trying to process and seeing a professional can really help with this Heart Are you seeking professional support at the moment?


I just wanted to let you know that I have edited out the hyperlinks in your post as it looks like they were linking to a personal blog. We hear from new members that it can take a little while to get used to posting here, so I would really encourage you to have a look at our community guidelines- they can help to familiarize yourself with the forums Smiley Happy


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Re: I keep dreaming about my ex

Hi @paynecaitlyn! Welcome to the forums!

I'm really sorry to hear that you've been through so much. Smiley Sad It must have been really hard dealing with the breakup on top of losing your baby. I'm sorry for your loss. It must be tough being reminded of your experience through your dreams.

I think it's normal to still dream about your ex. I still dream about people I haven't seen in years! But if the dreams worry or upset you, seeing a psychologist could be a good option. There are many kinds of therapies to deal with intrusive dreams or nightmares, such as imagery rehearsal. This involves writing down the dream in as much detail as possible, then changing details of it to make it happier and reading out the new dream before you sleep. This is just one example of course. You could also practice relaxation techniques, such as meditation and breathing exercises, to help you go back to sleep more easily after you have the dreams. You can find plenty of these exercises online.

I don't think it sounds weird that you haven't dated anyone else since your breakup. Everyone moves into new relationships at their own pace and there are no right or wrong answers about how long to wait before entering into a new relationship. The most important thing is for you to do what you think is right for yourself and your own wellbeing.