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Re: I’m not ok, I’m really struggling and upset/need help

Oh dear @Cheeseburger . That's hard. Would you like to talk about it? I haven't been following through the whole thread so I am a little lost and not sure if you mentioned something prior about what is going on. I have been heart broken before. I imagine you are in a lot of pain Smiley Sad 

Re: I’m not ok, I’m really struggling and upset/need help

I do know that it is okay to let it all out with a cry @Cheeseburger . I'm here for you <3 

Re: I’m not ok, I’m really struggling and upset/need help

@mspaceK  I have mentioned that I’m going thru some friends who don’t talk to me anymore, I have 2 ppl who check up on me, and that’s my boyfriend and my best friend, I’m ok now my boyfriend msged me, but it still hurts that I’m hurting bcuz I don’t really know why I’m crying so much I cry myself to bed and listen to my sad depressing songs

Re: I’m not ok, I’m really struggling and upset/need help

Thank you for bringing me up to date @Cheeseburger . And I feel like I can absolutely relate to what you are going through in a way. When I left high school I lost my whole friendship group, at the same time I also broke up with my boyfriend and literally felt like I had absolutely no one. I kind of spiralled after that and went down hill. It took a long time to get motivated and eventually I made new friends and now I have a lovely boyfriend. I am really happy that you have your boyfriend for support. Does he know what you are going through? About how you are feeling with crying and stuff?

 

I know it doesn't necessarily help the situation, but it is normal to feel this way when you're being rejected by friends. There is nothing wrong with you. It sounds like listening to the songs and crying is a way to cope and deal with the pain you're experiencing. 

Re: I’m not ok, I’m really struggling and upset/need help

hey @Cheeseburger , so sorry to hear that. It's hard to be heartbroken, I've been there before, somewhat I still am. Crying is often a way to let it out, but there are several other things you can do to distract yourself. See if some of these may help Smiley Happy

1. try sewing. It's fiddly and complicated, but it ends with a great result. I'm personally a big fan of cross stitching. 

2. redecorate or declutter your room. I've done this recently to all my clothes, so now I have like no clothes lol

3. plan a party - birthday party, christmas party, pretty much anything for everything party! i'm currently planning my sixteenth (even though its 5 months away lol), but I want it to be big! I'm using pinterest (may have a little bit of an addiction, but pinterest is great for everything!) It doesn't even have to be for an upcoming occasion, it passes the time!

4. organise a relaxing bedtime ritual - it doesn't have to be anything fancy, even just a bath bomb and a candle with some tunes. It's so relaxing!

5. ASMR is absolutely fantastic for (I believe) everything. ASMR is like a tingly sensation you get from sounds that you normally wouldn't notice, these sounds are called triggers. It's very quiet and relaxed, and it will only take me 5 minutes to get off to sleep most nights. Here are a few lovely ladies I would try first (even though you'll probably discover many of your own!) - ASMR Darling, ASMR Glow, Olivia Kissper ASMR and Goodnight Moon ASMR.

Hope some of this helps!

I have some more if you're up for it!

love and hugs, 

blobby Smiley Happy

Re: I’m not ok, I’m really struggling and upset/need help

@mspaceK  my boyfriend sort of knows but my best friend knows me too well, and can see when I’m faking a smile and he asked me today if I was ok I said no not really and broke down, and I felt weak crying at him bcuz he’s never seen me like this before

 

 

MY boyfriend is amazing he’s the best thing that’s ever happened to me and I can’t lose him without him I wouldn’t still be fighting and the same goes with me with him, he’s got mental health as well and it kills me to hear him talking about how hard his life was before he met me, we both need each other and I’m never leaving him.

 

 

I had the same thing happen when I left high school I lost my boyfriend then and then lost most of friends bcuz he spread lies about me, but now I’m trying to stay strong but I’m falling apart, and can’t do anything about it as I’ll just sound like I’m making it about myself

Re: I’m not ok, I’m really struggling and upset/need help

@blobby  thx, I’m actually excited for my 17th birthday even tho it’s 8 months away but there’s manly a bigger reason why I’m excited for my 17th bcuz the month after I get to go and be with my boyfriend☺️☺️☺️ I can’t wait, but I also want to plan something special for my mums birthday but it’s hard to when she’s always with me lol, I also wanna make a cake for her but I don’t know how to cook lol, but I’m feeling better thx to my boyfriend☺️☺️😍😍🥰🥰 I’m lucky to have my boyfriend

Re: I’m not ok, I’m really struggling and upset/need help

You know - it's actually pretty brave to allow yourself to cry in front of people @Cheeseburger . It shows your courage to actually be vulnerable. Sometimes things get a bit too much and having someone there to lean on can really make a difference. I feel the same with my boyfriend - he is my main support and without him I think I would be so lost. It is different for me in the way that he doesn't really get mental health issues, we're kinda like a ying and yang in that regards. But in relation to you, it sounds like a really good thing that you two can be there for each other. And yeah - similar to me when I broke up with my boyfriend at the end of high school no one wanted to be friends with me because they were friends with him and "sided" with him. I was going through mental health issues and was sorta off the rails which did not help. I wasn't a very nice person at times because I was dealing with so much and didn't know how to communicate with people. 

 

What was their reaction to you crying? I freaked my boyfriend out a couple weeks ago when he got a call saying I was going to hospital for mental health reasons. He was quite supportive though. 

 

It sounds like your relationship with your boyfriend is so important right now. Can you perhaps spend more time with him? Would that help? I have been surrounding myself with my boyfriend a lot lately which is helping. 

Re: I’m not ok, I’m really struggling and upset/need help

@mspaceK  I can’t surround myself with my boyfriend, as he lives far from me but we’re planning on breaking the distance soon, and I can’t wait, but he tells me whenever I need him he’ll be there for me, no matter what happens we’ll have each other for the rest of our life’s (first guy to say that to me).

 

The guy I was with before I dropped out of high school, was actually a bad person, he took my phone pretending to be me, he lied about his age, and his name, and he also got me to start stealing things and smoking (both biggest mistakes of my life) all my friends I had were he’s friends and only put up with me bcuz I was I was together with him 💔😞 but now I have one real friend and and my truly amazing boyfriend

Re: I’m not ok, I’m really struggling and upset/need help

That sounds like a difficult situation you were in before so I am glad you have your supportive boyfriend now @Cheeseburger . I'm just sorry you can't see him as much as you would like right now, but breaking the distance is a good goal to have. 

 

It's kind of interesting reflecting on the past and the decisions we made - though not always helpful as it can bring up distressing things and I don't want to do that. I just wanted to say though, that there were things that a friend I used to have got me into some bad stuff which to this day I truly wish I never did. But I guess I was able to learn from those experiences. And I'm definitely more mature now (at least I think I am.....lol). 

 

How are you feeling at the moment? What are you doing right now?