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I need help, PLEASE!

I don't know what to do anymore. I'm alone. I don't have anyone to talk to anymore, anyone to trust.

My dad recently met someone after being divorced for about 11 to 12 years. She has four children, three boys and one girl. They never stop fighting. They always fight amongst each other and with their mom. They each have to have the last word. Eventually my patience started to run thin. But I always had someone to talk to. He was my dog and best friend. We had to put him down recently. With no one to talk to anymore, I was forced to just hold everything in. I can't do it anymore. All I've felt has just been sadness and anger. I can't even remember what it feels like to be happy. My dad has abandoned me. He told me the only way he and his fiancee could be happy is if I was gone. He told me he doesn't want me anymore. My soon to be step mom hates me. I overheard her say it to my dad. I can't even say how I actually feel. The moment I do it's just going to come around in a circle of hate and anger towards me. I feel like I'm going crazy. It's been six months since I've even heard the words 'I love you'.

Please help me. I can't handle it anymore.

Hydra542
Hydra542Posted 22-12-2017 06:12 PM

Comments

 
Bree-RO
Bree-ROPosted 22-12-2017 08:09 PM

@Hydra542 I am so sorry to hear about the emotional abuse from your Dad and your stepmom. Are you close with your biological mother? I am so very sorry about your beautiful dog too. You're up against a lot of grief and emotional neglect so it is completely normal to feel this way. You need to know, their behaviour has absolutely nothing to do with you. All of this is a reflection of themselves. You write so eloquently, clearly a very intelligent & interesting person.

 

I want to link you into some resources, before I do that can I check you're in Australia? We are an Australian site, I noted the "mom" and am wondering if you're in the States? If so you can still use the forum for peer support but we may not be able to link you into local services/resources to help you get qualified support. Hope to hear from you soon.

 
 
Hydra542
Hydra542Posted 23-12-2017 01:49 AM

Thank you very much. I am in the states. Honestly I really just needed someone to hear me and to be able to actually say it. Just knowing that someone out there cares just a little is a big help.

 
 
 
missep
missepPosted 23-12-2017 06:51 PM

Hi @Hydra542,
I'm so sorry to hear you're going through a tough time Smiley Sad
Also about your  beautiful dog Smiley Sad.  Dogs are like our best friends. My heart goes out to you.
I'm glad talking about it has made you feel a little bit better.
How are you feeling now?

 
 
 
 
Hydra542
Hydra542Posted 23-12-2017 07:03 PM

@missep I'm feeling a little better now. I'm going to be going to the other side of the country to visit my biological mom in a few days.

 
 
 
 
 
CookieDough
CookieDoughPosted 23-12-2017 09:45 PM

I'm in a very similar situation - step mum that hates me, don't really speak to my dad and my best friends are my dogs. I have terrible anxiety so I don't like to talk to new people or even my own family. When I bottle up my anger and sadness it usually ends with me drinking, smoking or taking whatever I can get my hands on, which often makes things worse.

All I can say is you're not alone.

Thanks for sharing your story.

 
 
 
 
 
missep
missepPosted 23-12-2017 07:12 PM
that's good to hear @Hydra542! I think that's a really good idea. Are there things you can do to self-care in the meantime? Doing things that make you happy? Smiley Happy
 
 
 
 
 
Hydra542
Hydra542Posted 24-12-2017 05:02 AM

@missep there are some things I've been doing that help. Playing online with my friends, doing homework, and studying all help keep my mind off of things. And honestly just being able to talk to someone without any repercussions really helps. So thank you so much. You have no idea how much this has helped.

 
 
 
 
 
missep
missepPosted 29-12-2017 11:15 AM

@Hydra542 Sounds like you know how to take care of yourself really well Smiley Happy
That's what we're here for! It's no problem at all! I'm so glad it's helped Smiley Happy

 
 
 
 
 
Viridae
ViridaePosted 24-12-2017 05:20 PM

Hi there @Hydra542 and you too @CookieDough!

 

I'm very sorry that you two are going through this situation, as it is very tough--and honestly, it is not fair at all. You both deserve to be valued by both your parents, and I know how hard it can be when step-parents are determined to drive a wedge between your parents. Hydra542 I'm glad that you have found ways to cope with this, and you're doing a really good job and I'm pleased that they're all really constructive and/or fun activities! What sort of games do you like to play?

 

I'm also super glad that just being free to talk about it helps, and the ReachOut community is always here for you! If you find there is a time that it all seems to be "a bit much," and perhaps it's not an ideal time for responses because of time zone differences or you just really need someone to listen in that instant, I would really encourage you to do a thorough Google search and find out American help lines (for example, in Australia we have Kids Helpline for crisis support) that apply to you (as it's hard for an Australian to know what may or may not be accessible for you). I did a quick Google search and found a few National numbers that may be useful such as National Suicide Prevention Lifeline (which covers a lot of things besides suicide prevention from what I can gather) and IMAlive. Being Australian I can't recommend anything, only tell you there are hotlines out there should you ever be in a pinch and need support immediately.

 

I hope you @Hydra542 and you too @CookieDough are having a nice holiday, and the ReachOut community will be here if you need!

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