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I want it..

I'm 103 days self harm free but I really want it. I want to x so badly. 

I can't do this. 

I'm not strong.

I don't deserve to be alive. 

I don't deserve support. 

I can't get better. 

I can't have a good day without breaking down. 

I let everyone down. 

I'm not good enough. 

I just need to die then everything will be OK... 

===========================
Trying to make my misery
just a piece of my history
A little less victim a little more victory
-Icon for Hire

Re: I want it..

Hi @redhead sounds like you're in a really bad head space with all of those negative thoughts. It's ok to feel this way. Let's have a chat on email.

Re: I want it..

Hey @redhead please call SCBS on 1300 659 467 if you need to chat to someone!

Re: I want it..

@TOM-RO I spoke to scbs...
===========================
Trying to make my misery
just a piece of my history
A little less victim a little more victory
-Icon for Hire

Re: I want it..

How'd it go? @redhead

Re: I want it..

@Asche well I didn't do anything.


Though my first thought this morning was why didn't I do anything, why am I alive Smiley Sad
===========================
Trying to make my misery
just a piece of my history
A little less victim a little more victory
-Icon for Hire

Re: I want it..

I should be looking forward to today, I'm going to the BBL but all I'm thinking about is how I want to die.
I'm not going to do anything, my friend is coming any minute to get stuff ready for new year's then I'm off to the cricket but fuck I want to be alone and hurt myself.
===========================
Trying to make my misery
just a piece of my history
A little less victim a little more victory
-Icon for Hire

Re: I want it..

Hey @redhead, well done on staying safe last night despite the strong urges you were experiencing.  I encourage you to see this as further evidence that you have the strength and strategies you need to cope with distress.  Perhaps be mindful of using 'should' statements as they are often self-critical.  It's okay that you're not feeling super excited as you've had a difficult 24 hours.  I do hope you enjoy the BBL today though.  Are you a huge cricket fan?  

Re: I want it..

@Lee-RO I love the cricket.
===========================
Trying to make my misery
just a piece of my history
A little less victim a little more victory
-Icon for Hire

Re: I want it..

@redhead hope you're enjoying the cricket and it's giving you a much-needed distraction! Heart

______________________________________________________
No human being, however great or powerful, was ever so free as a fish