Just need to get it out
So much is happening.
Leo (my new puppy) is home.
The cats are very unhappy with this, they've barely come out of my brother's room.
Leo is happy until he's left alone (somewhere safe with food and water, obviously) and then he cries.
I'm stressed. I have to raise this puppy into a fully qualified service dog. With no help because the NDIS decided not to fund anything to help me.
Dad's putting extra pressure on me as well. Between him and the puppy I barely get the chance to rest.
I'm still recovering from school camp too, that took so much energy from me.
And (tw for food/ eating) I'm getting this really weird thing where I can't even think about eating 90% of any food. I don't know why. I can deal with salty food that's certain textures. But anything else I don't think I could eat.
Vegetables are basically inedible for me right now, which is obviously a problem because I kinda need more in my diet than potato, pasta and salt.
I'm just exhausted.
Hey @Tiny_leaf ,
Firstly - congratulations on being a new dog parent!! That is so exciting - but from what I've heard, having a new puppy can be super stressful, let alone also having to train them up as a service dog. I know that both @Claire-RO and @Bre-RO have become new puppy parents this year and it sounds a bit like having a toddler! The first few weeks can be especially challenging, so don't be too hard on yourself - it's a big adjustment for everyone. Do you think an organisation like https://www.minddog.org.au/ might be able to give you some extra support at all?
The food stuff sounds really hard, does that usually get worse with stress for you? Thinking of you - if all you can manage at the moment is potato, pasta and salt, that's better than nothing- I know that I also find it really hard to eat sometimes when I'm exhausted, and it sounds like it's been a massive few weeks for you. Thinking of you- and feel free to share puppy spam any time!
@Janine-RO I don't think Mind Dog is a good fit for me honestly, most of their services are over Skype/video chat.
I don't know what's happening with the eating at all...
Here's Leo. He's a cute baby I love him, even when he tries to eat everything.
Awww @Tiny_leaf I'm so glad that Leo is finally home! 🙂 He looks adorable! I'm loving all the dog pics in this thread.
I hope the cats get used to Leo and realise that he's here to stay. It must be really exhausting having to raise him on your own. It's awful that the NDIS isn't willing to help you. It sounds like a huge task. 😞
I think the legs going numb is a pretty common thing, even in people without FND. I wonder if it's similar to how some people's knees buckle when they're under extreme stress or have heard bad news.
The eating thing sounds frustrating. 😞 I hope you can feel better soon. 
@WheresMySquishy I have an NDIS review soon. In an ideal world of would mean I would get more adequate help.
In the real world it means I have even more stress and not much chance of getting what I need.
Huh, that weird..
Maybe it is, yeah. All I know is that I didn't like it.
In regards to the knee buckling thing (tho not completely). When my Dad was younger, his brother called him out of the blue, told him to sit down, said he had bad news, made sure he was sitting down. Then told him his elderly dog had died. My dad being my dad, burst out laughing. Apparently he thought he was going to say that his Mum (my Grandma) had died or something. Make of that what you will.
@Tiny_leafIf u're referring to the dog my Dad heard about the death of from his brother. That dog wasn't a puppy, she was very elderly. I think she was blind and deaf when she died or something as well. Though I never actually met the dog, it was one of the one's my Dad had years ago.
@Tiny_leafOh ok, odd. Tho i have heard of odder. Dad must of really liked that dog tho, cause almost a decade ago he got another dog, which we still have. Who has the exact some colouring as the dog had from when he was younger. They are so similar (apparently), that I sometimes hear my Grandma calling our dog by the dead dog's name, espically when she's patting her. The dog doesn't seem to mind, or notice really, I guess she just likes pats.
I said something I maybe shouldn't have.
But I'm tired of everyone expecting me to be over it.
I'm tired of him being protected from what he did more than I ever was.
Hey @AnnoyingCockatiel, welcome to the forums 
Pets really do become a part of the family, I feel like hearing news like that could have any bodily response.
It is so wonderful to see a picture of Leo @Tiny_leaf ! He looks super cuddly, but it sounds like maybe your cat didn't see him that way? 
You also mentioned that you're experiencing leg numbness from FND when you're stressed, is this something new for you?
@Hannah-RO yes he's a cuddly monster. (I say monster because he's teething at the moment...)
Yeah the leg numbness is a new one, and after it went away it was replaced by pain.
Period's started. Getting a migraine and a sore neck. Very little energy.
My parents are looking after Leo right now which is good because I don't have the energy, but I'll be guilted about it later.
Also trying to find a new gp because my current one is... crap.
@Sophia-RO no nothing really helped.
I've found a couple of GPs who might help.
I was going to talk to dad about them now (I'm in the car with him) but my brother decided to come along.
I just had to do a day long course. I'm exhausted. There's a reason I don't do full days anymore.
It feels like everything's shutting down.
@Sophia-RO it was a first aid course.
Apparently you're not meant to put dislocated knees back in by yourself.
Oops.
@Sophia-RO yeah, it happens every now and again.
But my doctors still don't want to look into hypermobility as a diagnosis. Lucky me.
Like when I say it feels like everything's shutting down that includes my body but no one will listen.
@Sophia-RO I mean that's assuming that I'm even able to get a new gp.
It's a battle trying to get my parents to help me change anything.
You really deserve a GP who is understanding and non-judgemental, and I am sorry that it seems to be something you have to fight for. Also congratulations on getting your new puppy by the way!It can definitely help to know exactly why or what we are stressed about. Do you think it might help to include something you can do for each item on the list? It doesn't have to be a solution but just a first step kind of thing or general ideas that you might have.
