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Just wondering

So I've had a chat with a few people and they've decided that I should go to counselling. My first appointment is after school today and I'm abit worried about it. You see as I said before I find it hard to talk inperson to people and I feel like first impressions are everything. I guess I'm just abit scared of being judged that's all. So if anyone has been to counselling 1 on 1 can you please tell me how your first time went and what it's all about cheers - Shy 💞💞

Re: Just wondering

Hey @Shyzkitty! Everyone's first time will be different! It depends on the counsellors and you.

Usually a first session will be fairly relaxed and informal, with the counsellor asking about why you're there and what you're having trouble with. You can use it as an opportunity to explore your whole situation with them so that they know the big picture, not just one or two issues :-)

You say that you find it hard to talk in person. Could you perhaps write a letter with everything that you want to say, and give it to the counsellor to read? That way you don't have to try to get it all out at once.

Well done on deciding to see a counsellor! It's a big decision and I hope it goes well for you.

Re: Just wondering

Thank you so much <3

Re: Just wondering

I hope your appointment goes well.
It can take some time to gel with a new therapist so don't be disheartened if the first session is hard and awkward.
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Trying to make my misery
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Re: Just wondering

Thank you x
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Re: Just wondering

@Shyzkitty

well done for taking the first step and booking an appointment with your counsellor. It can a nerve-raking experience meeting someone new for the first time, let alone, a counsellor.

@Lioness has offered you some great advice, writing a letter, or taking notes with you can help you get your story across and make sure you don't miss anything due to nerves.

Good luck today
_________________________________
sometimes it rains, sometimes it shines, this is how flowers grow

Re: Just wondering

Thank you so much <3

Re: Just wondering

Hey there @Shyzkitty

 

Firstly, I think it's great that you are so open and honest about how you are feeling. It takes courage to actually be hoenst about your fears and worries so good on you (I know it's not easy)!

 

Secondly, do not worry Smiley Happy I know it might be easy for me just to say that, but truly it will not be nearly as bad as you feel it might be.

 

I have been to counselling many times. In fact, I saw more than 4 counsellors between 2007-2012 (mainly as I was living in different places). I found it helped me 'get off my chest' some of the things I was worried about, scared of, stressed about, ashamed of. 

 

I was nervous the first time I was going to see a counsellor. I thought 'what am I meant to talk about?' and 'what are they going to think of me?'. I was worried they would judge me. And I was worried that I had to talk for an hour!

 

But you know, I found it much easier to speak to the counsellor as they were a third party, someone who didnt know me or my background. I wouldnt be able to hurt their feelings but saying something about a family member (whereas I wouldnt be able to say the same thing to my dad, for example). And before I knew it, the hour was up and I still had so much to say. I was on a roll!!

 

I found I would say things I didnt even know I was feeling untilt he words were actually coming out my mouth.

 

I'm happier and more balanced physically, emotionally and mentally than I have been in years. You will be ok, dont worry. I hope you find a good rapport with your counsellor and if, after a few sessions, you feel you dont 'gel' well together dont give up!!  You can always find a new counsellor who you have a better fit with.

 

I hope all goes well for you today Smiley Happy Smiley Happy

 

Re: Just wondering

Hey @Shyzkitty

 

Hope your appointment with the school counsellor goes well! 

 

@Lioness has offered a great tip about writing a letter or some brief dot points about what you want to say. As for first impressions, a good mental health professional would be empathetic and understanding that you would be feeling nervous.

 

It's not easy opening up to a complete stranger so don't feel that you have to rush through and recount everything. Like @redhead has said, building rapport and trust and being able to 'gel' with a pro is important.  Confidentiality is also a big deal too - your counsellor should tell you what this is all about too. This means that anything and everything you share is kept under wraps and no one else will know, unless you are at risk of harming yourself and others. 

 

Good luck and keep us in the loop!

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Stay excellent

Re: Just wondering

Thank you for the support! It means so much to me I'll let you know how it all goes <3