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Lost All Motivation

Lately and for a while it seems like nothing is exciting or interesting to me. 
I can't get myself to enjoy things for more than three seconds. 
It's as if I've lost all motivation, I find it hard to think positively and I don't think Its just Uni either. 
I'd be happy one minute then sad the next.

I can't sleep at night I'm lucky if I've gotten an hour or more each night for the past month. 
Im exhausted all the time, I don't like food it just seems like im eating just so I don't pass away and when I do eat it's either excessively or hardly at all. 
I hate my art, it feels like all I do is make work to complete some grade that doesn't matter to me, I don't care about my Uni assignments. I stay up at night and just cry. 
My mother is pressuring me to go to this job interview, despite the fact that im struggling with Uni assignments, it feels like everyone wants something from me but I'm just not doing well. Even the sites and forums I used to hang out I don't go to anymore, Ive neglected my friends I haven't seen them in months, I barley go out other than Uni. I just clean all day, go to Uni and get stressed out and then come home barely eat and pass out on my bed.  People seem to make out as though im lazy, even though I think it's because im not coping. I don't know what to do im trapped in a life I really hate. I don't mean to self diagnose but I might have depression because I've been sad for weeks on end, I'm lost, any Advice? 

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Re: Lost All Motivation

I'm so sorry to hear this @YunoGasai. I don't know if I can help you, but I can try.
First off, are you safe right now?
Second, I have had many suicidal thoughts last year, because I hated my life. It wasn't worth feeling like that, because I became so depressed that I tried to hurt myself. That didn't work though...
I would definitely recommend seeing a counselor, because this is a serious matter.
I'm always here for you, and I will help in any way I possibly can. Just tag me, and I will come and talk ASAP.
You will get through this, and I'm sure there are other people on the forums that can help too.
Sending love.
//You are strong, You are beautiful, You are enough//

Re: Lost All Motivation

Thanks for your support @xXLexi_Lou122Xx, it is really appreciated. You have provided some really helpful advice and sentiments, using your own experience and strength. I had to edit a part of your comment which included a self-harm method. This is because it can be triggering to other users in the community.

Thanks for sharing @YunoGasai, it sounds like things have been difficult for you lately. The way that you have been feeling has affected many parts of your life and is causing you to feel quite distressed, isolated and down. I can only imagine how difficult this is for you. Do you think there is anything that initiated all these feelings for you? Have you had this conversation with a GP? This is the best place to get a diagnosis and also a referral for treatment. I have also sent you an email Heart

Re: Lost All Motivation

All good @Taylor-RO.
Sorry. Forgot the trigger guideline...=_=
How are you going today @YunoGasai?

Re: Lost All Motivation

Hey @YunoGasai, I'm so sorry to hear that you've been feeling this way. These sort of feelings are hard enough to deal with without having even more external pressure from your mother and other pressures and commitments you seem to be struggling with, so I definitely understand how all these things can be accumulating to really trouble you. 

 

I had a similar sort of experience when I was in my first year of uni a couple of years ago. I lost a lot of my motivation and I starting feeling like all my emotions were varying shades of grey with nothing that sparked any sort of joy or excitement. For me, I think a lot of what I was feeling was chalked up to being isolated from my friends and feeling like I couldn't keep up with the coursework. It really helped me when I managed to get together with my friends, and have a bit of fun, but also helped me realise that many of them were struggling as well and that I was not alone in feeling this way despite all surface appearances. 

 

It's awesome that you're reaching out with your problems here, since I'm sure many of us have experienced something similar to you, and what you're going through is really really tough. Sending you love and support HeartHeart

Re: Lost All Motivation

Hey @YunoGasai if I remember correctly there was a thread a while back discussing some issues you were having with your mum. It seems like they might still be going on? I have had a very strained relationship with my mother for about 6 years and got so over whelmed with the pressure she put on me that I unfortunately had to cut ties with her. I realise not every one is able or wanting to do that but if you need to vent about that some more, I am all ears. 

 

With regards to uni, I can relate as well. I definitely struggled to maintain a good friend-work-study balance and it only ever ended up causing chaos and affecting my grades. One thing that helped me was reducing the number of courses I was taking per semester (instead of 4, doing 2). It really gave me the time to focus on each subject and not over-work myself which resulted in better grades too. Perhaps while you are figuring things out this could be something to help you? 

 

Also, just wanting to check in on what you thought about the suggestion to see a GP? This was the best thing for me when I was in a similar position to you. 

 

Hoping to hear from you soon Heart