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My Dad Might've Found My Journal Full Of Personal Thoughts (Including intrusive thoughts)

Hey y'all,

I'm kind of feeling a bit anxious right now because I think my dad might've found my journal that I've been using to write down and deal with my intrusive and anxious thoughts. But the thing is, is that these thoughts are super duper personal and I'd only keep it between me, my therapist and some of them between my friend and I. I don't know, I'm just a bit worried that he thinks I'm weird or gross because of my intrusive thoughts. My intrusive thoughts are super not good, and I've been dealing with them in sessions with someone from headspace. But the thing is, is that he doesn't know that. And reading that without context, will probably make him go what the heck. And not trust me anymore. 

I'm worried that he might've read it, and might think I'm weird and tell every one of my family members about them because he doesn't understand. I don't really know what to do in this situation. 

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Re: My Dad Might've Found My Journal Full Of Personal Thoughts (Including intrusive thoughts)

Hey @ApplesRoses

 

That does sound like an incredibly stressful and difficult situation. I can only imagine how anxious you must be because of this. 

 

In terms of the next step, it could be a good idea to ask your dad if he had found your diary and if he had read it. While it can be really scary to confront people about stuff like this, especially some so close, it can help reduce reducing some of the rumination around "what if". You can leave it vague, and only ask enough questions as you need. For example you could say "Hey, I realised that I left my diary out accidentally, you didn't happen to read it by any chance?"

From there you have a couple of options of what you can do depending on how he answers. If he says no, that allows you to put the issue to bed, process some of your feelings, and give you a sense of security. If he has read it you have a couple of options, that might be best to discuss with your therapist, as they will know your situation best. In the meantime it could be good to leave it short, vague, and somewhat comforting. You could tell your dad "I write down some of my heavy thoughts as a way to process them, but they aren't something that you need to worry about. I know that you might be concerned but I am working through it." This might be a way of giving him enough info to satisfy him in knowing that you're ok, without having to disclose more than you want to right now. 
 

I hope this helps! Let me know what you think Smiley Happy 

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Re: My Dad Might've Found My Journal Full Of Personal Thoughts (Including intrusive thoughts)

@ApplesRoses  That sounds like a really tricky situation. Smiley Sad
I can't predict how your dad would react, but what do you think would be the best and worse case scenarios?

Re: My Dad Might've Found My Journal Full Of Personal Thoughts (Including intrusive thoughts)

Hey @ApplesRoses !

 

HeyFriend.gif

 

I hope you're all right and things are well with you and your dad. It's a very tense and stressful situation especially if you aren't that close with your parents. At the end of the day, you will most likely have to talk to him and it would be best to clear things up so that he does know the context. You don't have to be specific, just explain to him what you have told us and I'm sure he would understand.

 

Also, what makes you think that he found your journal?

 

Keep us updated, I hope you're well Smiley Happy 

 

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Re: My Dad Might've Found My Journal Full Of Personal Thoughts (Including intrusive thoughts)

Hey @Anzelmo @Andrea-RO @WheresMySquishy 

Hope y'all are doing well, I'm sorry that I haven't been active on the forums. I've just been taking some time to myself. But to put this to rest, I'm pretty sure that he has seen it. But it seems like he's put the pieces together to work out that I'm attending appointment for my mental health. We aren't really close, but he hasn't treated me differently and it seems like we've moved on. I've been doing better since then. 

Thank you all for your concern <3

I think I might make an update about my time at headspace on another thread that I've made in the past. Smiley Very Happy

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Re: My Dad Might've Found My Journal Full Of Personal Thoughts (Including intrusive thoughts)

Hey @ApplesRoses 

 

Thanks so much for the update! I'm glad to hear that you're doing better and that you're dad isn't treating you differently Heart.

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Re: My Dad Might've Found My Journal Full Of Personal Thoughts (Including intrusive thoughts)

It's good to hear from you again @ApplesRoses! Smiley Happy

I'm glad that your dad hasn't treated you differently and that you've been feeling a lot better. Smiley Happy
I hope everything goes well for you. Smiley Happy