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Re: Not sure what to do

Hi. I'm back again and I am having trouble again. this time it has become worse and I don't know what to do. I find I am worrying way too much about the smallest things. I've been on the verge of crying for ages and most things have just gone down hill.. I haven't been able to get to sleep easily. and even if I do get a good night of sleep, when I wake up in the morning I am still tired. I came out to my mum but she's saying my discomfort is because of puberty and I will get over it. I have tried to talk to her about it but she keeps avoiding the subject. Everything has gotten to the point that I have almost given up. I've been self harming to try and distract myself from my suicidal thoughts but I have gone too close to suicide as I almost attempted over these school holidays. As I said I am having a lot of trouble currently and I don't know what to do.

Re: Not sure what to do

Hey @Bookworm2004
I'm really concerned about some of the things you've mentioned in your post. It sounds like you're going through a really tough time at the moment. I am glad that you've come back to the forums asking for help Heart First I just need to confirm if you're ok right now, can you tell me if you're safe?

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Re: Not sure what to do

I am safe currently.

Re: Not sure what to do

really glad to hear that @Bookworm2004 Smiley Happy 

I was wondering if you've got any self-care strategies or safety plans that you can fall back on whenever you're feeling particularly low? 
If you haven't had a look at the toolbox thread that we've got, there's a whole bunch of really good self-care and wellbeing posts that you can visit to get some ideas about things that can help you when you are feeling low. There was even a new thread added to it today about mental health apps which could be really helpful for you!

Re: Not sure what to do

I think I will look into those threads as I don't have any self-care strategies or safety plans. 

Re: Not sure what to do

Heya @Bookworm2004, good to see you again! Heart

Feel free to try out the toolbox threads and let us know how you go with them Smiley Happy
______________________________________________________
No human being, however great or powerful, was ever so free as a fish

Re: Not sure what to do

Hello. This probably going to start a bit shaky but it kind of did end well, I guess.

 

So last night I had to finish an assignment and I was told about it in class about 5 days before but told more specifically that if I hadn't finished in that lesson on Friday I had to work on it over the weekend and hand it in on Monday. So I was in such a fuss trying to find information and design things and everything. I felt like I didn't have that good of an understanding of the task and although I had every chance to ask my teacher, I find it hard to approach them and ask a question. This even happens with my parents. Anyway while I was almost in tears worrying about if I was doing it right or not and if it was going to be accepted my dad walked in and said that "you always do this. I thought you would've learnt by now. if you procrastinate you will not hand in assessments and you will get bad marks and that will lead to you repeating year 10. You should repeat year ten". Then Mum said that I should go to bed and she will wake me up a bit earlier to finish the assignment. Later that night I woke up with a nosebleed. Mum said it could have been caused by how stressed I was. We started talking about what happened and I started crying again. I told mum about how I was worrying to much and how it had been getting in the way of me doing things. She then said that she thinks that if this is affecting me so much, I should go and see someone about it and would I like to. I said yes so my mum is going to book me in as soon as she can. 

 

Basically, I finally told my mum about me worrying and how it was affecting me and I am going to see someone about it. I've been meaning to say something about it but I was always too nervous. In fact I broke down crying today when I got overwhelmed. Like, my chest was hurting, I was shaking, I was almost crying. I actually went to the bathroom so I could cry. it was brought on because we were talking in my class about what team sport we should do this term and it came down to netball and Oz tag. I don't like either of them. They both involve occasionally being 

Re: Not sure what to do

Hey there @Bookworm2004,

Assignments can be so tough to complete, even though the solution to not procrastinate and start earlier seems obvious, it's never as easy as people make it out to be. It can be tricky to reach out and ask questions about a task, but there are other ways of asking questions, such as writing a letter or emailing. Do you think that would be an option for you?

Though it came from a stressful situation, it's great that you were able to open up to your mum and share your worries with her. Seeing someone can be a great way to get support for your feelings and work out strategies that can help you cope with overwhelming feelings. 

 

Have you had a chance to look at the toolbox threads for self-care or coping strategy suggestions? It sounds like this morning has been rough for you, it can be so hard to recover from breaking down after being overwhelmed. Is there anyone you can talk to about these overwhelming feelings?


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I am finishing with ReachOut this week, say good-bye here. I'll miss you all!