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Re: Not sure what to do

HAHAHA sorry that shows how naive I am with drugs Smiley Tongue Oh noooo Smiley Sad No camping?!

Smiley Sad Awhh no @MB95 you're going to the dark side of the attachment issues, nooo come back!! We've got cookies back over here! And sloth hugs! Man I'm sorry you had a freaking 4 hour drive of being stuck in your own head Smiley Sad Were you having bad thoughts when driving? Like bad urges? Cause I get that sometimes if I'm in a state Smiley Sad Awhh *sloth hug* it's okay, baby sloth's got you ❤ Lol I won't force sloth hugs on you if you don't want them, but they're there if you need.

Is there someone else you can generate loving kindness for? Like an old pet or something?

I promise you, your psych does not want you dead! Like there is a chance she wants you to be more independent but she definitely just wants the best for you!

Now, I insist you go and do something nice for yourself like grab a hot drink, swaddle yourself in some cozy blankets so you know at least the blankets love you (...lol... I don't do that! no clue what you're talking about!), and watch/read something distracting! (or do something along those lines!)!

Are you feeling safe MB95? And are you being kind to yourself? Smiley Sad

*more sloth hugs*

*and white chocolate brownies*

*and your favourite gelato which I have forgotten the flavour of but I have a feeling it was some kind of extravagant chocolate*

*and nice dreams*

*I'm running out of ideas*

Shred your handbook of self-hate please!

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Re: Not sure what to do

Hey @MB95., 

I just wanted to quickly echo some of what @Lost_Space_Explorer5 has said Smiley Happy I really don't think your psych hates you or wants to stop seeing you. In fact, if she did, she probably would just discontinue sessions and say that she doesn't think you work well together (or some variety of that). 

It's actually super super common for clients to feel anxious about whether their psych likes them/finds them annoying/etc, and it's something called "transference". A lot of psychs are really well trained on grappling with this, and so it's a really good idea to open up to your psych about how you're feeling, and talk about how it's affecting your sessions. It might also be a really good jumping off point for you to talk about other things that might be difficult for you Heart

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Re: Not sure what to do

Thanks for the support guys @Lost_Space_Explorer5 @Andrea-RO ❤

I'm just really not feeling it at the moment. I'm trying to ignore it so I can be present with my grandparents but I just feel so distant and disconnected. 

 

Yeah the drive up wasn't great with thoughts but I'm feeling safe now that I'm here.

 

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Re: Not sure what to do

Awwwh Smiley Sad @MB95 I'm here for you.. It makes sense you're feeling disconnected with what's going on.. Mm it sounds like you were having some pretty heavy thoughts there Smiley Sad Are you feeling safe today? Can I help in any way?

It's gonna be okay... You don't have to do this alone, we're here if you want to talk ❤
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Re: Not sure what to do

Thanks @Lost_Space_Explorer5 ❤

 

I'm not sure there's anything anyone can do really, I've just gotta ride it out I think. I'm exhausted atm which I don't think is helping anything. I think I'm going to email my psych later to say I'm going to take a break and I think I might even take a break from here for a bit too. Idk. I just feel really off and don't want to be bringing these debbie downer vibes to the forums lol 

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Re: Not sure what to do

Noooooooooooo don't push us away too!! (of course that's your choice) Smiley Sad We're okay with your 'debbie downer vibes', as long as you say you're safe and stuff..

We want to support you through the good and the bad! Smiley Sad You know, it is actually okay not to be okay.. You don't have to put on a mask for everyone all the time.. We really care about you, I care about you, and I would be so sad if you disappeared Smiley Sad You are my clone! You are mumma sloth! It's okay for mumma sloth to be sad Smiley Sad You don't always have to be there for other people all the time. It goes both ways..

You don't need to ride this out on your own.. Smiley Sad Can you do anything nice for yourself to distract from these horrible thoughts and feelings?

There is hope, things are going to change, because they have to, that's the law of the universe Smiley Tongue I appreciate things might feel so dark and lonely right now and no one can reach you to pull you out of this horrid place. Sometimes all we can do is sit with you in that dark place until it gets less all-consuming, and we all wanna do that. No one should be alone in that dark place. I'm so proud of you for pushing through this, it really shows how much strength you have. And bravery, for sharing what's going on on here.
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Re: Not sure what to do

Hey @MB95, I’m catching up with some of this thread. I’m sorry that you’re still feeling really down. If you’re feeling that your sessions with your psych are making you feel worse, then I think it’s very wise to take a break. These negative thoughts are so draining aren’t they? Sending you lots of hugs Heart

 

Just wanted to give you a quick heads up that I needed to edit an earlier post from today, no biggie though. Smiley Happy

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Re: Not sure what to do

Thanks @Lost_Space_Explorer5 ❤ I read this earlier and it made me tear up so i decided to hold off on replying cause it just made me sad someone cared. So thankyou. 

 

I don't really know what's going on with me. I don't mean or want to push you guys away but you know what it's like. 🙃 

 

I did just read this again though and it made me smile the second time rounf. Mumma sloth lol Sometimes I really do wish we could meet in person.. I feel like you just get me. Thankyou for caring ❤

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Re: Not sure what to do

I literally just "awwh"-ed out loud

 

So... I made you something to cheer you up!

 

 

sloth hug gif.gif

@MB95 

 

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Re: Not sure what to do

Sorry @mrmusic, I didn't even realise.

 

@Lost_Space_Explorer5 this is the most incredible thing anyone has ever made for me and is so caring of you! How did you even make that? You have a SERIOUS talent! 

 

Honestly, I can't thank you enough for your support. You make me want to be here so thankyou ❤