@MB95 I'm happy to hear that you're feeling supported here 
I have felt as though others' wouldn't want to hang out with me for different reasons. I guess something I've been mindful of is to try and figure out their views and opinions on different things before I disclose xyz about myself
I'm happy to answer a couple of questions
I do a bit of both. Basically it's whatever feels comfortable about that topic. Sometimes it's easier for me to type it all out and then have her ask questions in session. And I'll purposely put in details that I know I would find very hard to physically express in session. I start by writing her name which tells my brain who it's for and then it just flows. Sometimes I'll write something and I feel better by writing and I don't feel like I need to share it and that's okay too.
Handing them over or emailing them through was something that I found quite difficult to begin with aswell. I guess ultimately handing her the letter or emailing it through was easier than reading it out loud. We took it in baby steps, she would read them in session to herself, sometimes out loud, it just depended on how I felt. And after a bit, I have been able to become more vocal in our sessions and not entirely rely on the written form to communicate with her.
Yes, I have felt urges to self-harm and have felt suicidal in the past. When I was at my worst with self-harm and suicidal thoughts I was actually seeing someone different, a mental health nurse who I had contact with on nearly a daily basis. It was what they called "Crisis care" which is linked to the public system of mental health. At first, when I was starting to disclose those thoughts it was quite difficult and I found that it was actually easier for me to nod or indicate yes to the question of it than outright saying it at first. Of course, as I talked about it more, the easier it felt to discuss with my mental health nurse at the time.
I know it feels really hard, but others have said mental health professionals are used to hearing about these things. One thing that helped me was when my current psych told me that whenever I come into the session I need to try and not think about how she feels or thinks about something - that she is able to manage her own thoughts and feelings and is there to help me with mine. Sure she is human too and will feel sympathy towards what I'm saying. But trusting that she can hold herself together to enable me to share how I'm feeling was one of the most helpful things she shared with me.
I hope this makes sense.
(I haven't properly read the rest of the thread, I've skimmed through a few posts, but otherwise, I'm just going on what I've read and remember thus far )
I have felt as though others' wouldn't want to hang out with me for different reasons. I guess something I've been mindful of is to try and figure out their views and opinions on different things before I disclose xyz about myself
I'm happy to answer a couple of questions
I do a bit of both. Basically it's whatever feels comfortable about that topic. Sometimes it's easier for me to type it all out and then have her ask questions in session. And I'll purposely put in details that I know I would find very hard to physically express in session. I start by writing her name which tells my brain who it's for and then it just flows. Sometimes I'll write something and I feel better by writing and I don't feel like I need to share it and that's okay too.
Handing them over or emailing them through was something that I found quite difficult to begin with aswell. I guess ultimately handing her the letter or emailing it through was easier than reading it out loud. We took it in baby steps, she would read them in session to herself, sometimes out loud, it just depended on how I felt. And after a bit, I have been able to become more vocal in our sessions and not entirely rely on the written form to communicate with her.
Yes, I have felt urges to self-harm and have felt suicidal in the past. When I was at my worst with self-harm and suicidal thoughts I was actually seeing someone different, a mental health nurse who I had contact with on nearly a daily basis. It was what they called "Crisis care" which is linked to the public system of mental health. At first, when I was starting to disclose those thoughts it was quite difficult and I found that it was actually easier for me to nod or indicate yes to the question of it than outright saying it at first. Of course, as I talked about it more, the easier it felt to discuss with my mental health nurse at the time.
I know it feels really hard, but others have said mental health professionals are used to hearing about these things. One thing that helped me was when my current psych told me that whenever I come into the session I need to try and not think about how she feels or thinks about something - that she is able to manage her own thoughts and feelings and is there to help me with mine. Sure she is human too and will feel sympathy towards what I'm saying. But trusting that she can hold herself together to enable me to share how I'm feeling was one of the most helpful things she shared with me.
I hope this makes sense.
(I haven't properly read the rest of the thread, I've skimmed through a few posts, but otherwise, I'm just going on what I've read and remember thus far
)
@MB95 thank you It took some hard work and a great deal of trust in my psychologist but it happened. I am sure that one day you will feel ready and confident enough to trust your psych too
Ah that sounds frustrating that you weren't able to bring it up afterward. That can definitely feel pretty sucky hey?
When it was new for me it was so much easier to say it at the start of the session and give it to her then, because then I couldn't talk myself out of it. I often still write things and don't decide until right before the session I want to share with her, and that's okay too. In that instance sometimes it is easier for me to bring it up at the start and say it's something I want to focus on a bit later in the session.
Ultimately, it can be scary to say "hey I've written this and I want you to read it now". I completely understand how that can be so intimidating. Maybe you could say that you've written some stuff down because it's hard for you to verbally get it out and really need them to read it properly in session. I hear that being assertive feels difficult and I get it, but please know that each time you try, whether or not you get the desired outcome, you are making progress, because you are challenging that part of you that finds sharing and opening up difficult.
You are absolutely welcome, reading others' experiences is something which helped me immensely so I'm glad you appreciate it
That is actually a really interesting question about how I let myself trust my psychologist that she could manage her own emotions and look after herself in session. For me, it was said at a time when I'd already done a bit of work with her and I had the ability to be able to look back on past sessions and realise that what she was saying was true. I know for me when I was starting my journey, hearing that others' could trust their psychs and be totally open with them and still continue to go back, it gave me hope that one day I'd get there too. I guess my biggest piece of advice would be to take it bit by bit, you may not be able to open up as quick as you would like, I believe that this would be linked to your personal experiences as to how quickly you can learn to trust someone. But to acknowledge when you make a step no matter how small. Even if it's something as simple as managing to look at your psych in the eye for 5 seconds. Or you felt a tiny bit less anxious inside yourself. Each of these tiny little steps means you are making progress. And I wish that someone had said that to me when I first started seeing someone face to face, as it would probably have helped. I hope this helps
@Eden1717 I'm sorry to hear you haven't had a great experience with being able to share things written down to your psych. I can imagine how frustrating it would be to have them skim over it and then ask questions you've already answered.
It took some hard work and a great deal of trust in my psychologist but it happened. I am sure that one day you will feel ready and confident enough to trust your psych too Ah that sounds frustrating that you weren't able to bring it up afterward. That can definitely feel pretty sucky hey?
When it was new for me it was so much easier to say it at the start of the session and give it to her then, because then I couldn't talk myself out of it. I often still write things and don't decide until right before the session I want to share with her, and that's okay too. In that instance sometimes it is easier for me to bring it up at the start and say it's something I want to focus on a bit later in the session.
Ultimately, it can be scary to say "hey I've written this and I want you to read it now". I completely understand how that can be so intimidating. Maybe you could say that you've written some stuff down because it's hard for you to verbally get it out and really need them to read it properly in session. I hear that being assertive feels difficult and I get it, but please know that each time you try, whether or not you get the desired outcome, you are making progress, because you are challenging that part of you that finds sharing and opening up difficult.
You are absolutely welcome, reading others' experiences is something which helped me immensely so I'm glad you appreciate it
That is actually a really interesting question about how I let myself trust my psychologist that she could manage her own emotions and look after herself in session. For me, it was said at a time when I'd already done a bit of work with her and I had the ability to be able to look back on past sessions and realise that what she was saying was true. I know for me when I was starting my journey, hearing that others' could trust their psychs and be totally open with them and still continue to go back, it gave me hope that one day I'd get there too. I guess my biggest piece of advice would be to take it bit by bit, you may not be able to open up as quick as you would like, I believe that this would be linked to your personal experiences as to how quickly you can learn to trust someone. But to acknowledge when you make a step no matter how small. Even if it's something as simple as managing to look at your psych in the eye for 5 seconds. Or you felt a tiny bit less anxious inside yourself. Each of these tiny little steps means you are making progress. And I wish that someone had said that to me when I first started seeing someone face to face, as it would probably have helped. I hope this helps
@Eden1717 I'm sorry to hear you haven't had a great experience with being able to share things written down to your psych. I can imagine how frustrating it would be to have them skim over it and then ask questions you've already answered.
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