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Re: Nothing is changing

@Tiny_leaf  thats fine I was more meaning is it like mainly hallucinations or delusions or negative symptoms... that kind of thing? it sounds like it is mainly hallucinations though..?


it can get super complicated when talking about psychosis though because there are a bunch of things that can give people psychotic symptoms but aren't psychotic disorders which is why you need to see a psych because there are some very particular requirements if you will that determine what is coming from what. for example PTSD can cause psychotic symptoms as can some personality disorders so trying to figure out what is what is super hard. 


It sucks the person ignored your list that is really rude and hurtful. I hope the new person is more helpful. 


Re: Nothing is changing

@Eden1717 oooooohh that makes more sense.

Yeah, mostly hallucinations and negative symptoms. There were a few delusions but I never mentioned them because I knew no one would believe me.


My trauma-stuff was actually caused by my psychosis. 

And I think that was caused by my depression, unless the depression was actually a pre-psychosis that was just negative symptoms.

Huh.... I wonder if that's why it's never fit into "classic" depression...

But the general consensus is either that it's psychosis from depression, or that I have neither and just... think that me trying to dig through a wall is my autism..?


Personality disorders are weird like that, no one can agree on the classifications. 

Like do I have persistent depression or depressive personality disorder? Nobody knows but lots of people argue. 

Re: Nothing is changing

@Tiny_leaf  Hmm that does make things hard when a lot of things all started around the same time and there was no clear event that kicked things off. I can really empathize with the psychosis type stuff causing trauma because if it gets super intense it can really cause a lot of distress and distress that you can’t get rid of at the time because a lot of the stuff that is happening you can’t influence the same way you can with other problems in your life. I wonder as well did these “episodes” last for a long time continuously or did they happen over a few days or hours and come and go a lot? Because if they were short bursts that may be another reason you are having trouble being taken seriously. Some psychs won’t consider psychosis unless it has been going for a while and if it didn’t then they often just say it was an episode of intense stress or something like that.


it is also hard because a lot of autism behaviors can look like psychosis if the person isn’t verbal or if they are very distressed so it is hard to know from the outside what is going on and if the person already has a diagnosis of autism then they likely just put it down to that.  


As for personality disorders that is a whole other area but they do generally agree on what the symptoms are it is more if they are a mental illness or disorder that seems to be contentious. Either way they can really mess up a persons life and make is super hard for them to function. 


It sounds like you want/need a fresh perspective from a professional who will look at everything and take the time needed to really get to the bottom of everything. It is sad that has not already happened. 


I guess the the other thing is sometimes we can get really caught up trying to figure out what is going on and why things are happening instead of just dealing with things and trying to work on making things better from where we already are. This is completely understandable because logically if you can figure out what is wrong you can fix the problem. But mental health is kind of an exception cause there are no tests you can do or ways you can objectively confirm a diagnosis and so every diagnosis is always going to be somewhat questionable and possibly wrong. So sometimes finding a name isn’t going to actually lead to finding how to fix it. But it is a tricky issue and it is not fun to be feeling like you are paddling against the current all the time trying to find some help. 

Re: Nothing is changing

Hey @Tiny_leaf 


Just catching up on this thread and I got to say it's not nice to read about how difficult accessing the support you need has been for you both. It is really frustrating that access to services really depends on where you live - it shouldn't be like that. 


I truly hope more doors open for you when you turn 18. You mentioned moving to a city with a better mental health system - I think that's a really exciting goal. It truly makes a difference having services that are able to address what you're going through and provide you with practical support. 


@Eden1717 it must have been so frustrating for you, waiting for your psychiatrist to see your symptoms, rather than being trusted that you know your mental health best Heart 


Reading this thread got me thinking about an online service that is good to use when waiting for appointments with psychs etc. Wellways provide support to people living with a disability and/or mental health struggles. They have a Helpline where you can talk to people with lived experience who can also help coordinate support for you. I think you can actually get scheduled calls from someone too!  This isn't a substitute for getting the right diagnosis and treatment but I think it can be valuable to talk to someone who "gets it" and gets the complexity of the mental health system. 

Re: Nothing is changing

@Eden1717 absolutely! I know for me things are smoother for me when the psych has known me for a while because I feel more comfortable with them as I know them and their approach a bit.

I totally get where your coming from with that bit with the psych wanting to see it themselves, but at the same time I know that they need to be able to see evidence, either from another professional or themselves, and my guess would be they would rather see it to get a better idea of it in order to treat it. And at the end of the day, for insurance and legal reasons they would need to. But I can definitely relate to the frustrating experience this brings as a client.

Oh that is very frustrating! I'm sorry to hear that this has happened for you Heart


@Tiny_leaf hugs
I'm sorry to hear finding treatment is such a challenge.
It's great when you click with a psychologist, but not knowing if they have the experience can be tricky too! I guess I am pretty lucky the person I found fits both those boxes for me.
That must be pretty frustrating that there's nothing in your state to help you Smiley Sad I can imagine that it might feel kind of isolating too?


I am so impressed by the conversation going back and forth between you both. Being able to discuss your situations and the wisdom and insight from you both is incredible! Heart

Remember you're amazing just as you are Heart

Re: Nothing is changing

@Eden1717 well the first episode lasted like six months to a year....

I think I'm at the build up of another episode but hopefully that won't turn out like the last one did....


@Bre-RO I just hope it'll make a difference.... And that I'll be able to..

I'll check that service out, it sounds useful.


@Bee Yeah, it feels pretty terrible.. I hope something starts working soon...

Re: Nothing is changing

@Tiny_leaf  Hmmm that’s weird they ignored it if it went on that long. I hope you don’t have it happen again. 

Re: Nothing is changing

@Tiny_leaf I can understand it feeling terrible. I hope something starts working for you soon too.
Sending hugs and love Heart

Remember you're amazing just as you are Heart

Re: Nothing is changing

@Tiny_leaf  How are you going? 

Re: Nothing is changing

@Eden1717 not great.. my new medications are having side effects and they don't seem to be improving with time... Smiley Frustrated


How about you?