People pleasing

[PpSADeGo]

Hey guys how are you all?  .... I feel like I don’t know who I am at all and I have lost myself completely. Anyone else feel the same. I always want to impress people and be on people’s good sides. People pleasing sucks. 

[gina-RO]

Hi there @PpSADeGo , welcome to the forum 

That's such a hard feeling to sit with - people pleasing certainly does suck, it can be really exhausting. 

How long have you felt this way? Can you think back on a time you felt you knew yourself better? 

Look out for an email that I'm sending to the address you signed up with as well  

[scared01]

hey @PpSADeGo and welcome
feeling lost within yourself can be quite a challanging emotion to navigate. I am also a people pleaser even at the expense of my own happiness and wellbeing- is this the same for you?
Im not quite sure what is helpful in this case but i wanted to let you know that your not alone in what your feeling

[PpSADeGo]

Hello, hope your alright. Thanks for your reply. Yes it’s hard to stop people pleasing when I’m outside and talking to peers. I always care what they think about me. How do you cope?

[PpSADeGo]

Hey @gina-RO I have been this way for five years. I believe that it’s because I haven’t grown up yet and I’m still immature because I care a lot about what other people think about me. I don’t know how to grow up though. Do you feel like this?

[letitgo]

Hey @PpSADeGo, thanks for opening up this discussion on the forums. It's a really important one.

I'm also a people pleaser, and I get how it can be super exhausting sometimes. I'm wondering if you've ever spoken to a mental health professional about this, or if that's something you would consider?

Looking forward to hearing from you!

[DIVYA]

@PpSADeGo This is such a great topic . I used to be people pleaser too, when I was in school. I used to be the 'yes man' just to become cool like the other kids but then I realised I am actually not that person, the person that I was portraying was someone else who I didn't relate with. Following this, I thought to myself that I need to be myself and put happiness first. People like it or not its totally up to them.

[scared01]

hey @PpSADeGo
it is a hard thing to stop for sure! i kinda just take things as it comes as im not all that sure about how to help myself either so im really glad youve brought it up and as you can see many members here can relate too

[dontstopmenow]

Hi! Oh my gosh I totally get this, I feel like I am always aiming for people to like me and it always ends up in me getting into moral scrapes and neglecting caring for myself. I feel like I've lost myself completely too.. It's so hard and I can tell you that you arent alone in this. People pleasing really does suck. Have you found any ways or anything to make sure you focus on you or something?

[PpSADeGo]

Hi, no I haven’t found any ways yet. It’s crazy because you feel like your always focussed on other people even strangers. Do you feel that way? I sometimes meditate which can be helpful but it doesn’t always work.