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Ready to give up.

I haven't been on in a while but I need to talk.

This is getting out of control, I honestly can't handle it anymore.

I keep cutting and if i'm not I constantly have the urge to.

This morning I could barley get out of bed and all day i've just had this disgusting feeling, like a dark cloud that seems to be hanging over me. It's just there and I just want to lose it. I can't get rid of it, I want to scream and cry but i have no energy at all to do anything. The only thoughts going through my head are it would be easier if I died.

I think it's depression? But I don't know. And I don't exacxtly want to just rock up to my parents and say I think i'm depressed because I don't know if it is serious.

My parents found out about the cutting and they did understand but i've done it again.

I CANT DO THIS ANYMORE. It's killing me, it hurts so bad it's like im falling into a deep, dark hole and there's no way out. i'm losing myself within myself. I give up. </3

Re: Ready to give up.

HI dontknowwhattodo

I'm so sorry to hear things aren't getting better for you.
Depression can only be diagnosed by a doctor or medical professional and I'd really like to encourage you to talk more to your parents about this and seek some professional help.

 

I'm really concerned that you think 't would be easier if I died' and it's just not true.
I'd like to give you the Suicide Callback Service number - 1300 659 467
It's a 24/7 service, please call them any time you feel like things are so bad that you want to hurt yourself.

 

Take care,

JD.

Re: Ready to give up.

Hey dontknowhattodo

 

Even though so much is going on for you and you are feeling this way, I am glad that you are talking about it because its important to let people kno how you are feeling. I think talking to your parents and explaining what you are going through so that you can go and see someone to know for sure if you have depression will help you. I can only imagine how scary it is for you and I guess you need to find the right time for you to approach the situation. 

 

I hope you dont give up, I hope you keep holding on and find options to help you cope because you deserve the best 

 

Take care

 

_________________________________________________
**Believe in the power of you because you are your own hero**

Re: Ready to give up.

Hey guys,
Thanks for your help.
I think I was just having a down day yesterday, as I am feeling a bit better today.
I have read up on depression and other issues and it is sounding a bit like me.
The weird thing is I was having an amazing week and was really happy and even work was good but then when I woke up Saturday everything just seemed bad.
Thanks anyway though(:

Re: Ready to give up.

Hey dontknowhattodo,

That's great that you're feeling better today. Sometimes we just have moments that we can't bare and let it take over and control you.

I still think it's important you consider what JD and ruenhonx have suggested if it happens again. Hope online, or pick up the phone and talk to someone. It really will make you feel better, so you're not so caught up in what you're thinking. Keep having those good days and look after yourself. Smiley Happy

Re: Ready to give up.

Hey DKWTD,

 

Like S, I am hoping you have had another good day today. I am someone who functions pretty well most of the time but can get really down on random days without knowing why. I went on like this for years, but made the decision to get some help from a psychologist and have seen one on and off for white a while now. I am so glad i did. If you are prone to depression, even if it comes and goes, I think it is a really positive move to talk to someone about it and start to get a bit of an understanding of what brings it on and how you can learn to cope with it.

 

If you are finding you are self-harming, I think it is probably serious enough now to go see at least a GP and look to get a referral to see a counselor and psych.

 

Good luck and good on you for getting on here and sharing your feelings. 

 

 

 

Re: Ready to give up.

dontknowwhattodo, I just wanted to echo what the others have said and just add that it can help to pro-actively seek out some mental health support when you are not in the middle of a crisis like you were on Saturday. Now that you are feeling a bit better it is probably the perfect time to talk to your GP and describe what has been happening for you on a bad day. You could even print out this thread here and show it to your parents or your doctor if you find it difficult to say out loud.

Keep reaching out & hope to keep seeing you around the forums Smiley Happy

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