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Relationship issues

I’ve been dating a guy for 3 and a half years, for 3 of those years we smoked weed everyday. 

About four months ago I quit weed for good and around the same time it seemed like I lost all my feelings for him. He is now clean but my feelings haven’t come

back.

i had to leave when I quit because I got so anxious about being there that I couldn’t stay. He has been by my side pretty much through out the past months but as much as I cry and want to want him, I get that anxious feeling in my stomach when I see him. 

Its driving me insane because he still loves me so much and has improved himself so much, but I can’t seem to change this feeling. I’m beginning to turn to alcohol and sometimes hitting myself because I feel so bad. I don’t know what to do. Would couples counselling help us? 

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Re: Relationship issues

Hi @Clarents

I can hear that this is such a tough situation for you Heart Making the decision to stop taking drugs is such a huge step, and staying clean for 4 months is a really big achievement. It does seem like this decision has had some big impacts on your relationships and I can imagine that is a really difficult space to be in Heart You’ve mentioned that the pain can get intense and you turn to drinking sometimes- have you spoken to anyone before about managing that distress when it comes?

You mentioned couples counselling, what are your thoughts about seeking some professional support together? Do you think this might help your relationship?

It is really great that you are considering your options are open to seeking some support. We are more than happy to chat with you more about this Heart

 

You might also find Relationships Australia really helpful- they have online counselling available too 

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Re: Relationship issues

Hi @Clarents. Congrats on quitting smoking weed! That's such a massive achievement! Smiley Very Happy

I'm sorry to hear that you are struggling in your relationship right now. Can you identify any reasons why you no longer feel attracted to him anymore? 

From my experience of using drugs and being in a relationship with another user, I found that I associated them with drug use and the relationship as a whole on drug use.