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Re: Sadness over relationship with my parents

@Bee hi. I played skyrim and then went to my boyfriends house which is helping a bit. I'll be leaving soon and I might see a friend before going home. I still have a bit of anxiety in the my chest that i can't seem to shake but I'm not feeling guilty about not going to work any more thankfully. 

Re: Sadness over relationship with my parents

@mspaceK PC or console?

Re: Sadness over relationship with my parents

@mspaceK (I had to google it Smiley Tongue ) Looks nice from the video I just watched Smiley Tongue
Anxiety sucks, sorry to hear it's still there. But glad to hear you're not feeling guilty about not going to work now Smiley Happy

Remember you're amazing just as you are Heart

Re: Sadness over relationship with my parents

The anxiety is coming and going in waves @Bee . I'm just trying to get through it. 

 

@Pasta console! 

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Re: Sadness over relationship with my parents

Hey @mspaceK just catching up on posts. 

 

I'm glad to hear you've got the day off today and that you aren't feeling guilty about it. Are you doing anything nice for yourself today? Heart 

Re: Sadness over relationship with my parents

@mspaceK, you're doing so well to get through each day. You're very resilient and I hope that you can be proud of yourself for the way you are keeping going. 

____________________________________________________
“Your now is not your forever."
― John Green, Turtles All the Way Down

Re: Sadness over relationship with my parents

Thank you @MisoBear . I don't have a lot of positive self talk going on right now so it is hard for me to accept and take in your words when I feel like such an epic failure. 

 

@Bre-RO I had work today and it wasn't too stressful. I have had heaps of anxiety in my chest though. I just want it to be tomorrow. I have my GP appointment and therapy group. 

 

I'm feeling pretty down and unmotivated right now and tired too. 

Re: Sadness over relationship with my parents

@mspaceK I hope your appointment with your GP and the therapy group goes well tomorrow Smiley Happy

Remember you're amazing just as you are Heart

Re: Sadness over relationship with my parents

Hi @mspaceK, we'll always be here to remind you how strong you are and how much progress you've made. I know things seem very difficult right now, but I'm hoping that you can eventually see the positive things about yourself. Heart

 

Good luck for your therapy group and GP appointment tomorrow!

Re: Sadness over relationship with my parents

It's Thursday today and the weather outside is the best it has been all week. I'm currently in bed but just knowing that the sun will be out shining with a clear blue sky does make me feel a little bit better inside. 

 

I'm feeling overwhelmed by all my responsibilities that I need to do today. I have online training for a mini course I am doing tomorrow that has to be done today. I have a mountain load of clothes washing on my floor and I really need some things washed. I have to get up and eat so that I can take my medication but I'm not hungry. 

 

I don't know why I feel the way I do. I feel like I'm a brown crumbling leaf that should be green and beautiful and floating in the breeze now that it is spring. But I'm the leaf that's on the floor and kids are running through crunching it all up into a million pieces.  I'm Autumn when it should be spring. I'm nowhere where I should be and I can't get back up the tree. The crumbling dust that is now my leaf generates so much pain in my chest and I can feel bits of myself floating away in a strong wind and I can't find thise pieces again. They are so far away. It feels impossible to return them. 

 

So how does a crumbled leaf live? 

 

I'm not happy or truly excited about the things I used to be. I'm annoyed and irritated and agitated or nervous or stressed about pretty much everything. I don't want to be this way any more. 

 

Can't someone just sweep up the leaf and forget about me? Remember Autumn and think about me in Spring. I just don't think I can make my way up that tree again Smiley Sad