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Something broke and I can't get it back

So about April last year I went on a holiday and ate way too much. Probably doesn't seem like a big issue, but at the time I was absolutely devastated. At that point I was dieting/exercising a lot, and I was in the best shape of my life, although I still didn't think it was anywhere close enough to where I wanted to be. Anyway, long story short, it snowballed and snowballed for months and quickly my schooling became heavily affected and I gained like 15 kg and my life went up the creek pretty quick. I ended up doing awful in subjects that I was top of the class in. It became almost unbearable during the Aug/Sep/Oct months and I stopped sleeping properly or doing anything remotely productive and just wanted everything to end.

 

Every time I try to get my life back on track, it tanks. Sometimes I get it together for a week, sometimes it only lasts an hour. It's brutal, I literally just cannot do the things that I need to do, the things I used to do with ease, to make it through this year. I can't do homework for instance, I don't even mind doing homework that much, I love the subjects I'm doing. My mind just refuses to allow me to do the things I should be doing. Right now, it's almsot 1am Monday morning, I have about 15 hours of Summer holiday homework that is due today.

 

If someone has had this kind of condition, whatever it is, god just give me some advice. I think if you've ever been affected by something like this, you'll know what I'm talking about. I need some professional help, I recognised that for a long time. The only thing is that I have no idea where to go, and I can't let anyone know just how bad things are. I'm powerless to help myself, I would like nothing more to just get on with my life, to succeed, but it feels like I'm just a broken old shell of what I used to be.

 

so yeah, god just help me please

Re: Something broke and I can't get it back

Hey there @Thurston 

 

Sometimes when we have a lot going on in our minds it can be pretty hard to focus on tasks that used to seem simple to us Cat Sad It's so great that you have recognised that you are having some trouble though and have come to the ReachOut forums for some advice.

 

I wonder if you have ever thought about or used some goal setting to help you study or exercise? I know this sounds kinda lame, but you would be surprised how helpful it can be! When you put some time and effort into goal setting it can really help you to focus more. ReachOut has this really good fact sheet about how to set goals. A quick example of goal setting might be: "I will aim to do one hour of study Monday to Friday, and 30 minutes of exercise monday to friday. I will do this for one month and then reevaluate". If you were to do this, and stick to it, you should soon be back on track with your homework and fitness goals.

 

You mentioned about getting some professional help which I think would be really useful. I have seen a psychologist before and they really helped me work my way through some big rough patches. You can get set up with a psychologist through your doctor (gp), but you can also get free counselling online through eHeadspace and lifelife. Why don't you check them out?

lanejane
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Re: Something broke and I can't get it back

Hey @Thurston  I'm sorry to hear that you're having some trouble at the moment.  You sound like a very driven and high-achieving person, and I can imagine how frustrating and worrisome this would be. However, it definitely won't last forever, so try not to feel too despondent! 

 

Because you sound quite driven and focused, I was wondering if you have been giving yourself adequate time to relax and kick your feet up? Also, has anything changed or occurred that you think might have contributed to your current mental blocks?

 

@lanejane  has contributed some awesome tips and pointers.  Sometimes when we try to continually force things more and more, we seem to get further and further away from our goal!  I know I've certainly experienced this before.  Do you think taking some time off to relax and focus on your own well-being would be helpful?

Re: Something broke and I can't get it back

Hey there @Thurston - I'm wondering why you mentioned that "I can't let anyone know just how bad things are". Why is that? I totally understand that asking for help to the people around you can be the hardest thing in the world, but ultimately it might be the thing that helps you get better.

I'd suggest that you could start by chatting online with a counsellor online at eheadspace. That way you can chat one on one and work out together what's the best way to get some proper support in place.

Give it a go and let us know how it goes.

Online Community Manager

ReachOut.com

Re: Something broke and I can't get it back

Hey @Thurston 

by coming to ReachOut you've already shown that you're not powerless to help yourself. This is a huge step forward Smiley Happy

Are there reasons other than the dieting/exercise that are holding you back from studying consistently? ReachOut has some great factsheets on mental fitness and sleep that might help you regain energy and motivation.

 

 

 

Re: Something broke and I can't get it back

@Thurston no matter how hard we try to achieve perfection we will never be perfect. We have to embrace our flaws, it makes us human after all. It can be difficult to accept ourselves, we tend to be our own worst enemy.

I would suggest you talk to a professional about how you are feeling, it does help.

Being overwhelmed by homework is only going to make it harder to complete. I've been in this situation several times. i suggest you take it slowly, do a bit at a time and take regular breaks. If you need an extension, there is nothing wrong with asking for one.

Hope things work out Smiley Happy. stay strong.

Re: Something broke and I can't get it back

@Thurston 

i just wanted to check in and see how things are going ?

It sounds like you have been growing through alot over the last six months.

Have you seen your local GP about this? Or anyother health professional? It might be a good place to start they might be able to explain some things for you