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Re: TW Feeling Miserable and Stuff

@SomeoneNADJS those concerns sound really overwhelming....

I just want to say it's not your fault. You don't have to "fix" anything.

 

Trauma is messy. It's different for each person who experiences it. Not all trauma comes from a single, dramatic event. 

Trauma isn't just what happened. It's also how you felt, how people reacted, how secure you felt after it. It's even the age you were when it happened.

 

If the person who experienced it found it traumatic, then it probably was. I feel like Ms can be trusted to understand their own experiences, and they seem to find it incredibly traumatic. It's important not to minimise that.

 

I understand how important it is to figure out things like this. But sometimes the best way to go forward is to step back.

You might not have all the information you need just yet, but that doesn't mean it will always be like that.

For me before I could figure out how my brain got into that state it's in now, I had to just focus on helping myself get through things. 

I was only able to figure out what happened after I'd given myself some space and time, because I learnt things as I went along. 

 

 

Anyway I'm rambling again so sorry bout that... 

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Re: TW Feeling Miserable and Stuff

Hey R @SomeoneNADJS, it sounds like it all of this is very confusing for you. I know that you have been working hard to try and figure all of this out. It must be so difficult and tiring to sit with all these feelings of uncertainty and doubt. Everyone experiences trauma differently and the impact it can have on the brain/body varies. Have you ever thought of seeing a psychologist that is experienced in dealing with trauma? I am suggesting professional opinion as something that might help to answer some of your questions at the end Smiley Happy
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Re: TW Feeling Miserable and Stuff

[R@Tiny_leaf They are quite overwhelming. Thank you.

 

Yeah, poor Ms has been really affected by it, and I feel bad for saying this, but I still don't want to believe that this is what happened to us.

 

I think it'll still take some time to get out of this doubt, if we ever will. But I think what the older members of our system are saying is probably right, as much as I hate to think that.

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Re: TW Feeling Miserable and Stuff

[R@Taylor-RO It is.

 

Luckily our current psychologist has experience with trauma apparently. They haven't given their opinion yet.

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Re: TW Feeling Miserable and Stuff

Hey R, it sounds like huge amount to try and unpack and process for the system, do you think it would be helpful to discuss this with your psychologist next time you see them? I think @Tiny_leaf , trauma and its effects can look different for everyone, and hopefully having a mental health professional who's experienced in this area will be helpful. Are you seeing them again soon? 

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Re: TW Feeling Miserable and Stuff

[R@Janine-RO Yeah, I think we're seeing them tomorrow. I think this would be good to discuss with them. We also have a KHL chat tonight that I need to remember.

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Re: TW Feeling Miserable and Stuff

[T] We just had about six people up at once and we kept cycling through different people, and eventually Ms woke up and got scared because there were so many of us. They ended up having a flashback or two but I helped them calm down. Hopefully they'll trust me, because they're scared of most of the system. I know they also trust Co, but she hasn't been awake in weeks, and I'm not sure if they trust R anymore because she's in a lot of denial.

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Re: TW Feeling Miserable and Stuff

@SomeoneNADJS  Hey T, that sounds pretty unsettling, have you had that many system mates show up at once before? How are you feeling now? 

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Re: TW Feeling Miserable and Stuff

[R@Janine-RO Everyone who was there before has gone inactive now. I'm still worried Ms doesn't trust me because I don't want to believe what happened to them had this much of an impact. Everything's alright now, except I got scared because Ly accidentally switched in briefly, and I got a few partial flashbacks. I feel like I'm faking those, though, or that they're somehow my fault.

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Re: TW Feeling Miserable and Stuff

Hello R, I am glad to hear that things have settled down a bit. It sounds like that experience must have been hard for everyone involved. It is good to hear that you are feeling better now after being frightened when Ly switched in. You mentioned that you feel that they are somehow your fault, would you mind explaining what you mean by that?