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Re: TW Feeling consumed by all these thoughts

@mspaceK goodnight, and I hope it all goes well. 

Re: TW Feeling consumed by all these thoughts

I've just woken up. Straight to the bathroom again. Smiley Sad really bad pains and same thing as before. Almost time to go to the doctors. This is really getting me down Smiley Sad 

 

Mainly because the pain has been hurting so much and I'm really scared about the tests the doctors will need to do. And if I start throwing up I'm scared. I'm trying to keep myself calm. Smiley Sad 

Re: TW Feeling consumed by all these thoughts

@mspaceK Ahhh.. that sounds hard.. I'm assuming you've already done the tests, but if you haven't maybe you can watch youtube or netflix on your phone or something to distract yourself. You're strong, you can push through the tests! Personally, I look forward (as much as you can anyway) toward the diagnosis so then they can start the treatment asap, so I can get better quickly! I hope you're not as scared now Smiley Sad 

Re: TW Feeling consumed by all these thoughts

Sorry, I mean I hope you're not as scared now since you're with doctors and people who can care for you

Re: TW Feeling consumed by all these thoughts

@I_am_not_Groot @Tiny_leaf 

I just have to wait for results now. If it gets much worse the doctor said to go to hospital emergency. I'm really not feeling too great with everything. Physically draining and also emotional cause of the unknown my anxiety has been going haywire. 

 

Got some medication in the mean time. Hopefully it helps. 

 

Just going to lay in bed and try and distract myself. 

Re: TW Feeling consumed by all these thoughts

@mspaceK that's good that you've done the tests. I hope everything gets sorted without too much more trouble..

And yay for getting some medication! 

Re: TW Feeling consumed by all these thoughts

Thanks @Tiny_leaf . I've been pretty scared about everything and really sad. I'm worried it's something very serious and that I'll need the hospital. Well I know the hospital could be the best thing for me cause they'll monitor me but I'm scared about needing an operation and I know my anxiety is catastrophising everything. 

 

It's really hard Smiley Sad and I've been in a lot of pain. Never felt like this before and had this happen. 

 

Right now I am very tired and just been laying in bed. I spoke to my khl counsellor earlier about everything too which helped a bit. 

 

What are you doing today? How are you both @Tiny_leaf @I_am_not_Groot ? 

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Re: TW Feeling consumed by all these thoughts

@mspaceK that sounds really hard...

Do you have anyone who can come with you to appointments?

They could really help with moral support as well as helping you remember things, especially since anxiety can make concentrating/ listening difficult.

 

And I'm alright, but my joints are really hurting.. I need to wait for months before I'll get to see a specialist.

Re: TW Feeling consumed by all these thoughts

I am really sorry to hear about your muscle joints @Tiny_leaf . That sounds really stressful having to wait so long. 

 

Normally my bf would come with me but he is away until this weekend. My housemate came with me today but during the week she has work so I don't really have anyone. Smiley Sad 

 

What are you doing tonight? 

 

 

Re: TW Feeling consumed by all these thoughts

@mspaceK so no family/ extended family/ friends who might be free?

 

And hopefully I'll be getting some compression gloves  so that my hands hurt less  so that I can draw more  so that I can sell the drawings  so that I can save money up  so that I can get a dog  so that I can train them as a service dog  so that I can do stuff like a functioning human  so that I can get appointments  so that I'm in less pain. *deep breath*

 

You know the song "There's a hole in my bucket"? My life is basically that song right now I swear.. Smiley Tongue