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Re: TW: Idk how to deal with 'paralysed' feelings. My friends aren't real friends.

Thanks. I'm just doing a job for my mum, but I'll be back.

Re: TW: Idk how to deal with 'paralysed' feelings. My friends aren't real friends.

Are you back @Tiny_leaf?

Re: TW: Idk how to deal with 'paralysed' feelings. My friends aren't real friends.

That sounds really hard, especially if you have no way of contacting them.

If you want to tell me what you can/ can't do in terms of contacting people, maybe we could brainstorm ways to get around the obstacles there?

And I've also self harmed in the past and over a few years have collected a list of distractions and non-harmful coping methods if you're interested.

Also, I'm wondering if you have any friends you've met outside of school?

Re: TW: Idk how to deal with 'paralysed' feelings. My friends aren't real friends.

I would like to know some non harmful methods. that would be nice... Thank you.
I have met some girls outside of school, yes. but I can't see them over the Easter break, or when I need to see them. It's really hard. Especially when I feel harmful around myself. I don't know how else I can be happy, but not get hurt as bad as last time...

Re: TW: Idk how to deal with 'paralysed' feelings. My friends aren't real friends.

This isn't a complete list, so if there's anything in particular you like then let me know and I can give similar strategies.

 

•ripping up paper

•snapping twigs/ leaves

•destroying a cardboard box

•drawing

•listening to music

•watching a funny movie or video 

•drawing on yourself with felt tip pen

•an extension of the one above is drawing a butterfly where you'd normally self harm. The butterfly can stay there until it fades, and the idea is to not hurt the butterfly. 

•wrapping yourself tightly in a warm or weighted blanket

•anything that needs fine motor skills like braiding your hair, making something

•playing games 

 

I make small cards with these ideas on. If I feel like self harming I take out a card. If the idea will help me at the time I use it, if not I choose another card.

Re: TW: Idk how to deal with 'paralysed' feelings. My friends aren't real friends.

Thanks @Tiny_leaf. I like the butterfly one. I particularly like listening to music, doing art, playing my instruments, fuzzy things, video games, dancing, basketball, netball, and crafting things.

Drawing on myself with a felt tip pen is already my main strategy. But I tend to write lyrics to songs, that match my thoughts (they aren't always good). I'll try a lot of those. What are the ones you use the most?

Re: TW: Idk how to deal with 'paralysed' feelings. My friends aren't real friends.

Ripping up paper helps me a lot when I'm frustrated, especially since I end up completely absorbed in trying to shred it neatly.

The butterfly one is one that I use if my feelings are really strong, since it includes both drawing and can stop me harming if nothing else works. Occasionally I'd need to draw a few butterflies in different places.

Listening to music helps me a lot, and I have a list of different songs that help me in different moods. For me I listen to faster, more hopeful songs when I'm depressed, and slower, sadder songs when I'm anxious. 

I also like blankets. I have fluffy blankets, plus one fluffy weighted blanket that I love.

I don't write lyrics, but I do write a lot of poems.

Re: TW: Idk how to deal with 'paralysed' feelings. My friends aren't real friends.

Sorry to just jump in your conversation but I just wanted to say those are some awesome ideas @Tiny_leaf! I have never heard of the butterfly one and I might actually give it a go!

Re: TW: Idk how to deal with 'paralysed' feelings. My friends aren't real friends.

That's a good idea, doing certain types of songs for different moods. I write lyrics from depressing songs, making me wonder what I'm doing wrong, and what I did that changed me. I think I'll try the butterfly when I feel really strong emotions. Thanks @Tiny_leaf. i appreciate it a lot.

Thanks for being here for me. Smiley Happy

Re: TW: Idk how to deal with 'paralysed' feelings. My friends aren't real friends.

All good @Bananatime04. You're welcome to join if you want. I'm watching youtube atm, but I'll still be here as long as I can.