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Re: TW: drowning

@annabethxchase 🙃Heart

i just really need some comfort in real life but im am very grateful for the support on RO Heart 

 

today my “friends” were talking about self harm and i kind of just died a bit. i mean im already dead but i just felt another punch into my stomach. little did they know i fucking self harm ergh. ive been clean for 4 days and ive had so many urges over the last few days. 

 

im currently listening to kesha’s songs to hype me up for tomorrow. i have this gut feeling hat something is gonna go bad tmrw :/

Re: TW: drowning

Glad to hear it @litgym Heart

I'm so sorry you were stuck in that awful situation - but it's so fantastic and incredible that you've been fighting those urges and staying clean! 

OMG it's tomorrow!! Have so much fun! I get those gut feelings and they suck - I always get a feeling that my mum will be in a car crash and she'll die and i'll be stuck with my father. Is there anything specific that you think will go wrong?  HeartHeartHeart

Re: TW: drowning

@annabethxchase yeah Smiley Happy

im very excited Smiley Happy i just feel like my friend will be a bitch or just i don’t know something that’ll ruin the night. like on my birthday this year i almost ended it. i do have many thoughts of ending it but that was 1 out 3 times when ive been so close and that was my fucking BIRTHDAY ! i also get that feeling something will happen and ill end up with my father Smiley Sad

 

and shitt i just remembered i haven’t studied once this holz and i have exam week in 3 weeks 😬 but ive actually given up on everything, oh whale🐳

Re: TW: drowning

Yayy!! Oh bummer @litgym, fingers crossed all will be fine. That sounds terrible @litgym and at the worst time as well. 

OMG exams already? Wth!? 

Your wellbeing comes before school so put yourself before exam stuff Smiley Very HappyHeart

Re: TW: drowning

Hey @litgym this sounds painful, please know you are incredibly strong and it will not always be like this. There's a fierce strength within you, you will make it through Heart

 

About the thoughts and the urge to self-harm, are you able to stay safe tonight? Do you need extra support?

Re: TW: drowning

@annabethxchase yeah it was terrible i hate remembering that day and night Smiley Sad and yeah i hope tmrw night is good ! ew yeh exams and yes my mental health is more important but i know for a fact in the exams ill be seating there like wtf does this mean 😬

Re: TW: drowning

@Bree-RO yeah it is painful and thank youHeart

im safe for tonight Smiley Happy i did this thing where i drew a butterfly and i think of someone important. if i harm before it rubs off then ive killed that person. so that’s a good way for me to reduce self-harm.

Re: TW: drowning

Ahaha @litgym

I think that's me on a daily basis - especially in math lol

Re: TW: drowning

@annabethxchase mmm me as well, i don’t think i actually pay attention in class expect for french because im usually really restless so i tend to spaz out a bit😬😂 and in design, the unit is too easy for me so i tend to just go ahead and not listen ahaha and every other subject is too much effort to listen hahah.

Re: TW: drowning

It sounds like things have been so intense and painful today @litgym. I've heard of the butterfly idea before, I'm so glad it works for you! Heart Every day that you resist those urges to harm yourself is such a huge achievement, well done. 

Sometimes when I feel very anxious or like something bad is going to happen, I try to use a grounding exercise to stay present - a really good simple one is looking around and naming five things you can see, hear, and touch. You can also add smell and taste but I find those super difficult!! 

 

Did you say it's a Kesha concert that you're attending tomorrow? I really love her, too, her story is so inspiring and she's a very talented musician. I hope you enjoy it.