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Re: TW the past is still hurting me so much

Aww... That's so annoying, having a fever. Has your mum been a bit nicer after this morning?

Re: TW the past is still hurting me so much

My family were shopping and everything went wrong for me and I couldn't move and my ears were ringing and it felt like the same confusion from psychosis but I wasn't hallucinating so I called mum and asked her to come home and she said they'd be back in about half an hour.

But then someone decided to go grocery shopping on the way back, so it took them 50 minutes and I was alone and scared and in pain and asking someone to help me.

And when they got back I had to carried to the bathroom by dad and then crawl over the cold tiles.

Mum sounded really angry and upset when she got back and I think it was because of me.

Re: TW the past is still hurting me so much

I'm not trying to do anything wrong but I think I always do.

Re: TW the past is still hurting me so much

@Tiny_leaf it's okay, you are not doing anything wrong asking for help from your family when you need it Heart

I know it's hard when the people around you are upset and angry about something that is out of your control but they most likely just don't know what to do to help you so maybe you could try and think of some specific things that could help? Like a glass of water or some fresh air?

Re: TW the past is still hurting me so much

I'm so so sorry @Tiny_leaf! Being basically paralysed and in pain is not fun. Is there a possibility that a home doctor could come around and help? I know when I was sick with a vomiting bug, they really helped. Please at least try something to help. Maybe Panadol or neurofen or something.

I have to go to bed, but please take care. Goodnight. Xx

//Nothing is impossible. The word itself says "I'm Possible"//

Re: TW the past is still hurting me so much

@Tiny_leaf  That sounds really scary. Smiley Sad It could be that your mum was upset about something else or that she was just in a bad mood. Or she could have just been annoyed because she was so busy. It's not your fault.

My mum is like that too. Everyone asks why she sounds so tense around us.

I hope that you can feel better soon. Being sick is no fun at all. Heart


Re: TW the past is still hurting me so much

@not-an-otter thank you. 

 

Mum just.. overloads me with questions when I'm already stressed, suggests one thing that doesn't take my abilities into consideration (when I'm unable to stand for example, her telling me to walk more isn't exactly helpful) and then gets angry when not only can I not do it, but I can't explain why because the stress of the conversation makes me go non-verbal..

 

Dad responds pretty well to that though, so it's at least a bit easier when he's home.

Re: TW the past is still hurting me so much

@xXLexi_Lou122Xx well, when I couldn't move from the waist down and was crying in pain, dad realised that something might be actually wrong, so I do have an appointment tomorrow (yay!)

And I've now got a heater, some honey and lemon juice in warm water, and a good movie, so thanks to that I'm doing okay all considered. 

Goodnight (actually.. it'll probably be morning when you read this...)

Good morning, and I hope you slept well. 

Re: TW the past is still hurting me so much

@WheresMySquishy it was..

And I'm honestly starting to hyperventilate whenever she walks into the room - not that she'd notice...

 

 

She expects me to be able and willing to do whatever stupid idea she suggests, even if I know from experience that it will make it worse; then gets angry when I can't.

I can barely speak to her now because recently most of my interactions with her've been her standing over me looking angry or her completely ignoring me while I've been crying in pain.

I don't think she even cares about me anymore, she acts like I'm just an inconvenience to her, instead of her child.

It feels like I'm a problem. When I started having health issues it's like she just.. started caring a little less. Like when birds push the weakest young from the nest.

I'm just.. not enough for her any more.

Re: TW the past is still hurting me so much

I'm so sorry you had to go through this with your mum @Tiny_leaf . And yes, I am reading this this morning. Smiley Happy

Are you feeling any better today?

Here for you.Heart

 

//Nothing is impossible. The word itself says "I'm Possible"//