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Re: Think I might be suffering from borderline personality disorder

@Jess1-RO  sleep was terrible, I feel like I can stay in bed all day.

 

Re: Think I might be suffering from borderline personality disorder

Think I fell asleep at 11pm and woke up at 1am not being able to go back to sleep until 4am. I called khl during the time I couldn't sleep and it felt like she just wanted to end the call the whole time. She said it's more for crisis support at those times, which I fully understand and support but I was unaware, I was thinking of just hanging up so others could talk but I didn't want to be rude, so I sort of just kept saying "yeah" which ended the call pretty quickly. I will have to wait until tomorrow afternoon to talk to my counselor at khl. 😒

Re: Think I might be suffering from borderline personality disorder

Aw @Pasta that sounds like a tough night and a difficult call - I'm sorry that you didn't get the support you needed in that moment. How are you feeling now? Heart I hope the day has been easier for you and that the chat with your khl counsellor goes well. 

 

 

Re: Think I might be suffering from borderline personality disorder

@Bre-RO I think I'm feeling fine at the moment, currently home alone though. I don't know how the call is going to g

 

I think I might have made a mistake, I can't decide if my decision was good or bad. Yesterday was supposed to be my appointment with a gp but I decided not to go think my mum cancelled it the day before because I asked her if I could go to the movies. I asked her to cancel the appointment about a week ago but I'm unsure if she did, because I'm feeling better, doing better than when I asked her to book the appointment about two weeks. I don't know if I've stuffed up, I'm starting to get anxious thinking about it, a tense feeling in my chest bit it's not bad, not like the guilt feeling or hurting.

Re: Think I might be suffering from borderline personality disorder

I hate feeling like this, I'm so alone and the only person to blame is myself.

 

''Cause I really need you here

and I really need you now 

I'm watching you disappear

you never seem to turn around''

Re: Think I might be suffering from borderline personality disorder

Hey @Pasta 

 

How did the call end up going? I hope you were able to work through the anxiety you were feeling about cancelling the appointment. Rest assured many people do that - we usually book appointments when we're at our lowest and by the time the day comes around we feel better and don't know what to say. I know I've done that a few times! Can you re-book? 

 

I know you're feeling alone at the moment but I want to remind you that we are all here to listen to you and support you Heart  

Re: Think I might be suffering from borderline personality disorder

@Bre-RO I haven't called yet, the councilor isn't in at the moment, couple hours still.

Unsure if I should or will re book, I don't think I need to.

I think I'm fine or maybe I'm just not feeling anything. Empty

Re: Think I might be suffering from borderline personality disorder

@Pasta It's been a while since you posted, were you able to call your counselor? Smiley Happy

Remember you're amazing just as you are Heart

Re: Think I might be suffering from borderline personality disorder

Just finished a call, unsure if I was able to talk to my counselor, I didn't ask. It's my fault, didn't get to talk about what I wanted which was also my fault. I think they will be in tomorrow but my mum will be aswell, I will have to leave the house. My head aches, going to sleep is hard especially in this heat, it feels soo hot. I hate myself for not asking if the consoler was there, I so know why but I just need to talk to them, I feel like I can trust them.

Re: Think I might be suffering from borderline personality disorder

Hey @Pasta 

 

I wanted to check in and see how you are going since early this morning? You have been having a tough time lately and I can hear that you keep blaming yourself for things. It seems like you are are going through a bit with being worried about not asking the counselor and not being able to sleep. That must be super tough, but you give yourself some credit you are on here looking for support as well as contacting KHL. I saw that you cancelled the appointment with the GP, its OK that you changed your mind, can you talk to your mum and see if you can get another one. 

 

I also saw that you were going to the movies to see the Joker, I hope you enjoyed it I am hoping to see it at some point once all my uni work is done Smiley Happy