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Re: Tired of my doctors and my health

@WheresMySquishy do you (or anyone else) have any idea how to get doctors to do their job/ how to speak to them effectively? 

I've got an appointment on Friday (yay!!) but.. not sure how to best approach it...

 

I need to look competent but not like a know-it-all,  like I need help but not like I'm helpless, and be strong/ firm without seeming aggressive or submissive... this kinda stuff doesn't come naturally to me at all...

Literally any ideas would be helpful, even just good body language tips or a few helpful phrases.

Re: Tired of my doctors and my health

Hey @Tiny_leaf . Firstly I just want to say Good on you for taking the steps to try and get some answers and get the help you need. That takes courage and you deserve to have doctors with your best interests in mind and actually doing their job. 

 

I get what you mean about not being too aggressive or submissive. Sometimes I find that when I go to the doctors they don't really take me seriously or think my illness isn't as bad as it could be - I don't know why but there have been several times there has actually been something seriously wrong with me and my doctor just brushed it off as something minor like my diet is the problem - and then they don't do further tests to see what is actually wrong with me.  This went on for a while(several years) and I actually needed surgery once, and then recently with my infection and there have been other issues too. 

 

So now when I go to speak to a GP I let them know that:

 

"I feel anxious about getting the help I need because in the past I have had GP's who have not done necessary tests when I had explained what was happening to me and the problem escalated and I got quite unwell." 

 

"I feel like there may be other options, can you tell me what they might be?"

 

"I am worried there might be something else wrong, can you tell me what you are thinking?" 

 

I don't know exactly what your GP is or isn't doing as I haven't read through the whole thread, but what do you think about those "I feel" statements and asking questions?

Re: Tired of my doctors and my health

Thanks @mspaceK.

I probably do need a heap more "I feel" statements, I'm really bad at them usually... 

Re: Tired of my doctors and my health

@Tiny_leaf I haven't read through the thread but I like what @mspaceK has said about I feel statements.

Once I told the doctor "I think I have (xyz condition/disease/infection)" and my GP asked me what symptoms I had of it and I was able to list them, which ended up being correct. It was something minor but it was easier for me than saying "I am having xyz symptoms help"

For me I currently have an amazing GP so I'm kind of lost on how else to help.

Remember you're amazing just as you are Heart

Re: Tired of my doctors and my health

@Bee that was my first idea..

"I have xyz symptoms, the all seem to match up to xyz condition which I have the most of the risk factors for getting, can we either do more tests or refer me to a rhematologist. This one I've found has pretty good reviews."

He agreed initially but was then like "Lets do more tests first." which I was happy with, but then he didn't actually do the tests... 

Re: Tired of my doctors and my health

@Tiny_leaf okay thanks for recapping.
Would it be worth asking again about the tests?
Maybe remind him of the conversation and mention that you'd like to do the tests?

Remember you're amazing just as you are Heart

Re: Tired of my doctors and my health

@Bee I've tried that as well... he's very determined not to do his job..

He did a blood test, found nothing unusual, and told me to wait three months before we do anything else or any other tests, and and just exercise in the meantime. (the problem is pretty severe pain, especially in my legs, hips and spine). 

 

Re: Tired of my doctors and my health

@Tiny_leaf Smiley Surprised
I'm sorry to hear this! Smiley Sad

Is there any chance of seeking a second opinion?

Remember you're amazing just as you are Heart

Re: Tired of my doctors and my health

That's what I'm going to do if this appointment doesn't work..

I'm giving him one more go mostly so that I don't have to organize transferring all my medical notes, I'm just not sure how to increase the chance of actually getting through to him... 

Communication is not one of my stronger areas, especially face-to-face.

Re: Tired of my doctors and my health

@Tiny_leaf  I think that it's a good idea to be kind to the doctor but firm. I think it could be helpful to explain clearly what you want to happen and explain the inconveniences you've experienced as a result of him ignoring the problem. You could say that you've feel that the problem has got worse in the meantime. Sometimes when I've been really stuffed around by someone I've also found it beneficial to say something like, 'I was really happy with you and would have recommended you to my friends and family, but now I'm hesitant to do so'. It could also be helpful to explain that you feel that your concerns are being brushed off.

I think you could also say, 'What happened to the tests we were going to do? Are we still going to do them?' It's kind of poor form of him to recommend tests but then not do them. I knew a doctor like that and it was really frustrating how his plans would constantly change.