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Re: TW Trans/Non-Binary and Plural Stuff

[R] @Bre-RO Yeah. I’m not sure if she understands me completely though. I don’t know.

 

Making time for all of us hasn’t been going so well. Today especially. Trigger warning if you decide to read it, but the above post gets quite bad.

 

Blood test was fine. Got the needle in our left arm, and just had to be careful not to lift anything with that arm for a bit. It’s alright now. I don’t know what the results are yet.

Re: TW Trans/Non-Binary and Plural Stuff

Hi SomeoneNadjs

 

So very sorry that this is going on for you. What a horrible day and time. It makes sense that you are reaching out and you have alot of courage in trying to keep safe and being real about what is going on. It might be best not to make any big decisions right now bout coming out especially as things are very distressing.

Coming out is a big thing for anyone and I do hope that this can happen at some point and you feel supported in that moment. Tonight seems very hard and so please reach out if you need help to safe safe or call 000 if you or your mum cant stay safe. With the holiday coming up tomorrow, maybe this might be the break away that is needed?

Thanks again for reaching out and please keep sharing your story on the forum..

Re: TW Trans/Non-Binary and Plural Stuff

@SomeoneNADJS 

That sounds so, so difficult for you R...

 

On coming out to your friend, it's a really personal thing, and there's no right or wrong time to do it.

You might find it really empowering to have someone to share your trans experiences with someone else, or might not feel ready to come out yet, and either option is okay.

Coming out to your friend isn't about what is the right or wrong choice. It's about what you all think will make you happiest and most comfortable. Because.. well that's kinda what coming out is best for.

One other note - a lot of cis people are learning more about trans stuff. It's 100% plausible for a cis person to know trans stuff, especially one with a trans friend, so chances are you won't out yourselves with that.

 

I'm so sorry about what your dad said...

A lot of people just.. don't understand what being suicidal is actually like.

I just want to say that I know how you're feeling isn't your fault. You're doing your best and I believe in you.

 

And yeah.. f*** useless social rules.

 

 

Birthdays are hard, huh.. I've spent a lot of my, my friend's and my family's birthdays feeling absolutely terrible when I was "meant" to be happy.

 

It sucks that you weren't all able to celebrate A's birthday properly, but that's not your fault, R. Sometimes timing is just terrible.

 

 

Anyway.. I know this isn't as good as real cake, but happy birthday A!!

Related image

I've seen some members make threads for their birthdays, do you think that might be something you'd like?

 

 

Take care of yourselves after today Heart

Re: TW Trans/Non-Binary and Plural Stuff

Hey @SomeoneNADJS Smiley Happy
How are you feeling today?
I hate blood tests! Is your arm back to normal yet?

Re: TW Trans/Non-Binary and Plural Stuff

Hi @SomeoneNADJS (R)

 

How are you feeling today?

 

I just wanted to check in as things have been pretty hard for you at the moment. I wanted to say that although you are all are feeling so torn at the moment about everything and especially when you friend came out as Trans, you all are an inspiration, sharing your story is such a special and totally amazing thing to do! The thought and care you all put into navigating this situation blows me away every time I jump on the forums. It can feel like such a struggle when you are hiding who you are, and that you have to conform to social norms, but take your time with this, there is no right or wrong way.

 

I am glad that you got your last assignment done and I hope you are all able to do something nice these holidays.  I know you spoke about your mum snapping, how is she doing now? 

 

Re: TW Trans/Non-Binary and Plural Stuff

[R] @TOM-RO Thank you. I’m still considering making the decision to tell her at the moment. Today’s been better but it’s still been on my mind.

 

Everyone arrived safely here, and it looks like everyone’s (inside and out) is doing better than last night. Hopefully for a while we’ll be alright enough to discuss what we’re going to do next.

Re: TW Trans/Non-Binary and Plural Stuff

[R] @Tiny_leaf It has been difficult. I regret not saying anything and I’m thinking of maybe calling or texting her about it later. Idk yet. Still need to think about that one a bit more.

 

I’m not really sure how I would’ve explained how I knew trans stuff, since the only other person I’d known who didn’t identify with their assigned gender prior to my friend’s coming out other than me was S from our system. But that’s a different situation that wouldn’t require the level of knowledge I have. I’m careful not to raise suspicions.

 

Thanks. I talked to him again this evening and I still don’t think he understands the concept. Oh well, at least a laugh came out of the conversation. He asked me, “I went to a psychologist once, and you know what happened?” The answer was supposed to be that he never went again, but our mum called out, “That you don’t have any feelings?” Not as in an insult, but because our dad claims to have all of his emotions under his own control all the time.

 

About gendered social rules, I think one quote from The Castle sums up my feelings the best: “Tell ‘em to get stuffed!”

 

[A] A speaking from now on. Yeah, it kind of sucks, but I think I’d be okay with rescheduling the celebrations, as suggested by someone from another system we know online.

 

Thanks for the cake Smiley Happy We haven’t seen any bday threads around the forums, actually. Might have to get R to go and look for those a bit later.

 

Don’t worry, R’s been doing better today. Not 100% great, but I’d estimate about an 85% from what I can remember about her day. The other 15% was being forced to use a men’s bathroom and finding slurs against trans people on the walls mostly. Hopefully I can help keep her calm for the rest of the week.

Re: TW Trans/Non-Binary and Plural Stuff

[R] @Bananatime04 I’ve been better today. Arm’s back to normal and I can use it regularly again, but I can still see a little red spot where the tip of the needle went in.

Re: TW Trans/Non-Binary and Plural Stuff

[R] @Claire-RO Been feeling better today. Thank you for saying that. Inspiring other people was actually one of the pros of transitioning our psychologist came up with the other day for transitioning. Anyway, if all of this ends up helping someone through some means, then at least something good came out of all of this feeling like crap.

 

I can’t believe it took me so long to realise just what’s happened for me to get to this point socially. I’ve been bullied for years at school, and with the exception of one occasion a few weeks ago, it had stopped completely because all of the people who bothered me dropped out of school because they were old enough. I’ve been forcing myself for a long time to act in certain ways to avoid getting ridiculed. I just went along with that my whole life because I thought that was what I had to do and I had no other alternatives. Maybe feeling this way was an early form of dysphoria? I don’t know. I just want that cycle to end. It’s been going on for too long.

 

Thanks. Mum’s been doing better today. She seems back to normal, but she has told me about something I do that freaks her out. When I want to say something but I’m just too terrified to say anything, all that comes out is this weird whimpering noise that I don’t really do on purpose. I wish I had the courage to speak up about this normally.

Re: TW Trans/Non-Binary and Plural Stuff

Hey @SomeoneNADJS 

 

You've already been so courageous so far and really insightful Smiley Happy.  I just wanted to tell you that Heart