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Re: Turning Negatives Into Positives


@Atma wrote:

@Hey @Bee,

 

It sounds like you're having a bit of a hard time at the moment. I just wanted to send some praise your way for being able to focus on the positive aspects of what you're going through.

 

I can see that you're building up your resilience, your ability to bounce back, and overcome your tough times!

 

Keep up the great work!

 

Atma


 

@Atma: (Bit of a late reply, but I wanted to reply, just haven't felt able to until now...) Thank you you so much, what you've said means a lot. When I first read it I was grateful that you'd commented because I wasn't feeling so great at the time and it helped me to see that despite what had happened and gone through my mind I'd gotten through it and was focusing on the positives. It kind of pushed me to continue to fight. So thank you.

I hit a really rough patch. I can see now just how low I got from my writtings I did during the time. I also may have worked out a couple factors/triggers that set me off, and didn't help in trying to fight it.

I think I was going okay until exams were just there, and I realised I was soo under prepared. I thought that the news of my old friend passing away hadn't affected me, but I think it did more than I wanted to believe it would. I also had a another fight with a close peer (friend?) which didn't help my self-esteem or confidence I noticed that took a big blow to how I was, there was times were I wanted so badly to share with her a segment of the exam but felt I couldn't because of the fight... I think it all just built up, and became too much for me to handle properly. There was a lot of tension and stress within the family too, which didn't really help me any either.

But I've fought through it, and most of it has blown over now. I've just got to try and remain strong when I get my exam results back in hte next few weeks. I'm anticipating that I'll react badly because of my headspace during the exams, but I'll figure it out. It's only a number It can't hurt me!

 

 

Negative: Noticed how anti-social I've been and felt recently. Ugh. It felt like a huge effort to attend the extra class my drama teacher ran yesterday before school goes back next week :/

Positive: I was working on my major, so I didn't really have to interact with anyone bar the teacher.

 

Negative: A chat I had with mum the other night kind of hit me hard. My mind kind of threw reality and unhelpful thoughts at me -.- I felt like telling her, but then the moment subsided and I didn't.. err. Felt like I dug myself into a mental hole.

Positive: I know why I felt the way I did after our chat. An over reaction to past memories and facts.


Remember you're amazing just as you are Heart

Re: Turning Negatives Into Positives

Negative: Feeling hurt. It's like my mind is taunting me with recent happenings. The fight a couple weeks ago with a friend, the way an old friend left today when her boyfriend called her. The idea that no one really talks to me anymore unless they want to know something. Feeling as though I'm just not important to anyone anymore. And I know it's a false thought, but right now it's all I can believe. And the thought just continues to plague me, reminding me of all the times where things have felt like this. Remembering what this same girl I got into a fight with said a couple years back, about how when we first met she hated me, wanted me to just go away. Makes me question if our whole friendship was just a lie that I believed, that I wanted so badly....

 

Positive: I'm over analysing this. I've been caught in a terrible space all day, which isn't helping my outlook on anything right now. I know that I'm important to people around me, I know that while these thoughts plague my mind, a lot of the time they aren't true. And I know that I'm having this reaction because I've gotten my hopes up on false premisis, to be brocken when reality hits me.

 

Negative: I'm over thinking things right now and need to distract myself.

Positive: I'm going to head over to games and see if I can distract myself otherwise I'll dive into something else.


Remember you're amazing just as you are Heart
Highlighted

Re: Turning Negatives Into Positives

Negative: Last days of holidays, still so much homework to get done. I haven't done any of it. How am I going to get it done?!

Positive: I can and I will get it done. I can prioritise it and just do bare minimum things for some. It'll work out.

 

Negative: I have to deal with that subject, with that teacher for the rest of the year. Why didn't I just get the courage to change...

Positive: .I can treat this semester as a fresh start in it. I just have to try a bit harder and not get behind. I also get those few awesome friends in it.

 

Negative: I have no clue what is going on with us, are we even friends?

Positive: .I'm sure we're at least friends. He'd make it clear if he didn't even want us to be that. Right? Otherwise, I don't know.

 

Negative: I did nothing these holidays. I should have more of a life by now.

Positive: I did more these holidays than I have many others! They can only continue to get better. Smiley Happy Life is only going to continue to get better.

 

Negative: I keep saying I'll lose that weight, then I decide to put it off to tomorrow!

Positive: I have a plan. I know what to do. I shall be where I want to be.

 

Negative: Have to get my sleeping routine back to normal.

Positive: I've done it many times before, it's not really that hard, I'll be 'normal' before I know it.

 

Negative: I'm being cowardly and lazy.

Positive: I'm allowed a break.

Re: Turning Negatives Into Positives

Hey Birdeye,

I can realte to some of what you're saying there.
You're right with your last positive though, You're deffinately allowed a break! Smiley Happy
That's what I told myself starting last week, that I'm going to take a break, use these holidays to revocer myself a bit. I told myself that I'd make time for my major work, and not try to focus on anything else, because I wanted to de-stress not stress Smiley Happy

I'm sure you'll be able to get the work done, just chip away bit by bit, I know it probably feels like a huge amount, but break it down and know what you need to have done first (which reminds me I have to do some homework I should have done before my trial exams Smiley Tongue ops haha)


*Looks at time* Why am I still awake at this hour?!? Or more to the point, HOW am I still awake? Need to hone in my sleeping patterns again I guess! Smiley Tongue

Remember you're amazing just as you are Heart

Re: Turning Negatives Into Positives

Negative: Holidays now over, I wonder where they went. Smiley Wink
Positive: I did go out with a few friends during the holidays so it wasn't wasted + I can see some friends I haven't seen so it isn't that bad.

Negative: School's back tomorrow but I don't really want to deal with the dramas first day of term. Yay! :/
Positive: I won't know how bad (or even good) things will go until tomorrow. Might not even be something to worry about.

Re: Turning Negatives Into Positives

Hey Clockwork,
Holidays go too fast, don't they! My course started again today. Smiley Mad

Good luck with your first day back!

 

blithe

Re: Turning Negatives Into Positives

Negative: I have a horrible flu and is making me sleepy and it was so hard to focus at work 

Positive: Atleast I got up and did what I needed to do and tonight I am going to have the best sleep Smiley Very Happy 

_________________________________________________
**Believe in the power of you because you are your own hero**

Re: Turning Negatives Into Positives

Negative: Got all bar 1 exam back this week, not too happy with my results. Didn't do very well at all :/ Was more anxious about what my mum would think than my teachers, hated that I brought up that I get my ranks tomorrow. Erg. Had to tell her my marks. Was rather vague, but mostly truthful - I couldn't tell her that I only wrote one essay in my English exams when I was supposed to write 3, and she still doesn't know that I didn't write my drama essays. She found out about the assessment task we did last year where I couldn't write an essay, from my teacher during parent teacher interviews - I just never told her, I couldn't....

 

Positive: I did the best I could at the time when I sat the exams. Two of them were lower than I know I'm capable, but they were still decent marks for how I was feeling at that time (73% & 77.5%)!!!!! The ONE essay (out of 3) that I actually wrote came back with an insanely high mark - 17/20!! The highest mark I've ever gotten for an essay!!! WOo! Shows that I did at least retain something (and it happened to be what we had just studied before the exams) Mum wasn't overly disappointed with my exam reaults. She was happy when I told her one of my essays I got 17/20 for.

It's not like I did absolutely terrible in my exams, I flunked out in two subjects and took a beating in the other two, but I know where I'm at now. And I haven't gotten overly emotional and overwhelmed like I thought I would over getting the exam results back! Smiley Very Happy Which is good, because it's proved to me that I AM learning to handle my emotions better at times, and that I can still control to some extent how I react over things!

 

Positive: My positive for that negative is longer than the negative! Shows that I've been able to pull out more positives than negaitves from this experience. Smiley Very Happy

 

 

Negative: I got really overwhelmed a couple nights ago, and [saddly] resorted to self-harm... Smiley Sad

Positive: I haven't beaten myself up over it. I've come to accept that I struggled that day, and struggled to cope with the events of the day.

 

 

Negative: Have fallen into a slight negative headspace again the past several days. Have noticed that I'm clashing a fair bit with my mother and younger brother recently too, and it's always when I'm not feeling so great. The clashes cause fights which only end up making me feel worse, because I overthink think and analyse the event and end up dwelling on it. My mind begins to think of scenarios and statements that deep down I know aren't true, and are only based on hightened emotion, but I believe it and for that time I'm stuck in a self pitty feeling so lost and alone. It gets to the point where I've just wanted to run away.

Positive: I know that the fights stem from disagreements and our own independance and growing maturity. I know that despite these fights they both love me. This is something that I can talk over with KHL when my reg counsellor gets back Smiley Happy

 

 

Negative: My wrist has been incredibly sore the past couple days, writting again seems a massive pain Smiley Sad It's been a bit numb and I'm not sure why. I know I haven't been doing my exercises everyday either, which won't help...

Positive: I think it's because I had two weeks where I didn't do much writting.  I can work towards continuing my exercises I've been told to do.


Remember you're amazing just as you are Heart

Re: Turning Negatives Into Positives

@Bee

 

Now I must apologise for the late reply! I am so glad to hear that being on RO.com has helped you out, particularly around overcoming some tough situations.

 

I always enjoy reading your T2P posts. You've really got the technique down pat. I still struggle on a daily basis not to get caught up in negative thoughts.

 

Keep up the great work everyone posting their negatives and turning them into positives. You're all setting yourselves up for a lifetime of seeing positives! How awesome is that thought?

Re: Turning Negatives Into Positives

@Atma: Late reply? Haha. Doesn't matter Smiley Happy

Thanks, I guess it's one way that helps to not get so lost in the thoughts as much.

 

 

Negative: Feeling flattened by some thoughts recently Smiley Sad Feeling anxious about Monday's web sesh with KHL & the email I was sent, I'm overwhelmed with it and frankly **** scared! Smiley Sad Starting to regret what I said in the email a bit... err.

Positive: I wrote what I felt I needed to, at least I'm not hiding that completely! I can either try to go along with it, or I can tell her that I just don't feel like I can do that right now. I'm being honest & realistic about it all, which helps.

 

Negative: These thoughts, feelings and moods are consuming me. Refusing to leave me alone. Refusing to let me be myself anymore. I feel like I'm loosing the battle :/ Feeling like it's all just too hard Smiley Sad Hating the fact that I'm issolating myself from the world again. Feeling like I just can't do better...

Positive: I AM getting better at trying to stay connected to certain people. I am still able to be around people, I'm not entirely closing myself off - I am continuing to try and be the best I can. Still pushing on with my drama major's, still consciencely trying to ignore the negative things.

 

Negative: I got so low today that I shut down completely. I sat staring at the brickwall, ignoring the people around me, unable to even communicate with them. Listening to music to try and keep myself from heading down a destructive mind set, which only issolated me even more.

Positive: I tried to use music to stop myself from heading into a destructive mind set! I tried to keep myself at an even keal, trying hard to maintain my mood and actions to a steady medium

 

Negative: The speech our deputy & year advisers gave us today kind of made me feel like I'm the invisible medium hidding in the crowd. It made me feel like I'm doing things wrong. Questioning myself and how I'm going with everything.

Positive: I listened and took some points away with me....


Remember you're amazing just as you are Heart