Unhappy about my height

[PhoneMomma]

I am female, 5'3", and hate my height. I hate looking younger than I am, and having to ask for someone to get something down for me is so demeaning. Being called "cute" is especially distressing due to past trauma, and I was expected to be taller than I am. I am even considering surgery because I want a permanent option for being taller.

[Tiny_leaf]

@PhoneMomma that sucks...

People think I'm younger than I am too, and I'm too short for a lot of adult clothing and mobility aids to fit me 

Is it okay if I ask where the things are you need to get down (home, shopping centre, etc) and who's calling you cute?

[MaryRO]

Hi @PhoneMomma,

It sounds like you are having a tough time with being short and being called cute, due to past trauma.  I understand this must be difficult to hear, as it sounds like you really do not want to relive this trauma.  Have you been able to place boundaries and ask others to not refer to you as cute, as it is uncomfortable to you?  Have you been able to discuss this anyone in the past, such as a trauma counsellor?  Is this an option that you are willing to give a go?  Would you be open to calling Kids Helpline?  You can call them on 1800 551 800 or use their online chat service.  

[Wathan]

Hi @PhoneMomma
It must be tough to be called something that is related to your past trauma I am 5'4" but I look older than my age due to my face and the way I dress. Perhaps, is dressing up and hairstyle can be an option for you?
Like Mary said, Have you been able to discuss your feelings and distress about your height with a mental health professional?

[Bre-RO]

Hey @PhoneMomma just wanted to see how you are today? Hope you're feeling better  

[WheresMySquishy]

@PhoneMomma  Being short has its downsides for sure.
I'm 147cm (my mum is the same height) and I also get mistaken for being younger than I am. I had to ask someone for help today because I couldn't reach a shelf. Someone else called me short as well. It does not really bother me but some things are frustrating.
There are some advantages to my height though, such as being able to get into small gaps, not hitting my head underneath tables or on small roofs and having extra leg space.
I don't really know what I can say to make you feel any better, but I just wanted to say you're not alone. I share your frustrations about the negatives.

[Anzelmo]

Hi @PhoneMomma 

I hope you are feeling okay and more comfortable with yourself. There is nothing to be ashamed of for being that height and I'm sorry you've had bad experiences in the past for it. Height is something no one can naturally control. I'm actually a guy and I'm not that much taller than you, and I've faced some comments and criticism for my height. There were definitely times when I was a bit insecure especially since there's the expectation for guys to be tall, big, and strong. I understand that you probably feel the same with different expectations and just preference for who you want to be.

In my case, I  eventually learned to let go of those ideas and worked on myself on things I could change. Being a bigger person in my presence, confidence, charisma, etc. Eventually, I found my GF who is actually even shorter than me. 

Height is something that you cannot control, but I understand if it causes you stress and makes you upset. Aside from surgery, have you considered changing your style or fashion and maybe wearing more heels, or boots? I know they look really good on some people 

[Macaria]

Hi @PhoneMomma, since you'd posted the thread for a while, I just wanna pop out and check whether things are going better on you. As others said, height is something that you can't control, we might don't know the related trauma and how that influence you, but we hope you can love yourself a bit more and feel better. It does needs a lot of time to accept yourself ( I think it is similar with weight and body shape), and there can be many negative things happened on you. Please feel free to speak out and ask for help here once you feel bad, we are here supporting you