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What's going on with me?

My bfs mom asked if I get panic attacks and if that's why I can't breath(I was having trouble breathing) i said no but after I thought about it I realized I do get anxiety and oanoc attacks. Whenever I'm in a crowd of people I struggle to breath, I get uncomfortable etc. And so many 5ines when a friend invited me to dinner with his friends I started crying because I got so scared and other reasons. Today I was at my boyfriend's house again, from 8am to 40m, super happy, as time went by I got more sad, even his mom picked it up. When he took me back home I was at the point of crying but I said I was fine. Got home my parents wanted to go to the mall but I stayed, when my mom said to my dad "Jane and Ray is staying"(me and my brother) I got really scared, they left and I locked myself in the room, moved my bed to the door and got my hunting knife, I heard his footsteps and a tear fell, I kept praying that he doesn't come to my room and then he asked if he can talk to me and I said not now. Immediately after the last word I started really crying, right now I'm still crying and shaking. This wasn't the first time I'm scared to be left at home with my brother but it was never this bad. My boyfriend and his m9m picked up that I didn't want to go home and I didn't tell them that. What's wrong with me? And what do I do?

Re: What's going on with me?

Hey @EverythingCrazy , you did a great thing reaching out.  I'm sorry you had such a scary experience last night. Are you safe and feeling ok at the moment? you must be exhausted. 

 

It sounds like things have been slowly creeping up for you and the anxiety is taking up a lot of energy now and making you feel down too.

 

Have you ever tried calling Kids Helpline? They give 24-7 support to young people up to 25 years old. You can contact them via phone on 1800 55 1800, or through chat/email for counselling . It would be a great point of start for some professional support Smiley Happy 

 

Lina-RO