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cant wait to get out of here

cant wait until I can get away from my stupid family, looks like I will be doing my best to acheive one of my long term goals of moving away as soon as possible. I'm doing the best I can to have a great life and build an awesome future Smiley Happy I just need to get away from certain people its driving me crazy
//You can stay afraid, or slit the throat of fear and be brave//

Re: cant wait to get out of here

Hey @j95 

 

I felt the same way as that once.  Then when I moved away from my family the conflict stoped and surprisingly my connection with my them actually grew. I think it's because we saw each other less and we had a little time to breathe inbetween visits! Sometimes a break is good.

 

Is there anyway you can just have a break now for a few days?

lanejane

Re: cant wait to get out of here

Hi @j95 , I definitely think @lanejane has a good point there. I've spent time away from my family, usually on holidays or other committments, and when I've come back there's far less tension between me and my parents. Do you have anywhere that you can stay for a while? Or just perhaps finding something to occupy you for a few days so that you don't have to interact with them as much.

Re: cant wait to get out of here

Thanks @lanejane I don't much family really.... well thats not quite true because there is like a billion kids in my family but I don't really have "family" I've got mum, my older brother and heaps of younger siblings but I feel so disconnected from them. I can only see the younger kids every few weeks because thats the set up, can't change it I'm lucky I get to see them every three weeks that I do.  But its my mum thats causing me problems, ever since dad died she just hates on me. She treats me like she wishes I was never born and tells me it to. after everything I have done for her she turns around and says all this stuff to me, makes me feel so useless, all I want is family that care why is it so hard why does it have to take 19 years and still nothing? 

it just makes me so sad. 

//You can stay afraid, or slit the throat of fear and be brave//

Re: cant wait to get out of here

@safari93 I live out of home with my partner already, I haven't lived with my family since I was 15. it just makes things difficult when mum always wants something from me and harasses me about it until I give in but if I ask one single favor or even ask to take her out (being a nice person) she carries on and calls me ungrateful and this and that, its not fair!

Like I said why cant I just have a nice family? I know there everybody is different but some people have it so good, happy family always smiling, always talking and doing things together why hasnt my family ever been like that? well thats what it seems like anyway

 

 

thanks !! 

//You can stay afraid, or slit the throat of fear and be brave//

Re: cant wait to get out of here

Well I don't think every family is always happy and communicative all the time (I know mine isn't!) But you don't seem to have the greatest relationshp with your mother. She seems to have unrealistic expectations about how much you can provide for her, which definitely isn't fair

You mentioned that you have other siblings. Do you have better relationships with them?

Re: cant wait to get out of here

I have lots of younger siblings who are in foster care and the arrangment is I see them every 3 - 4 weeks, its nobodys faults its just the way it is, I only started seeing them a few months ago, so the relationship obviously isnt too great, they like me but its hard when you dont see them very often. I have an older brother I don't talk to him, he's ok but he's been pretty like absent sort of, hes got a different mum and so he wasnt around a lot when I was younger so it can be hard. I see him sometimes, he just sort of thinks he knows everythings, we're so different, its hard. I get that no family is perfect but sometimes I wish it was like the movies, everyone so happy and getting along everything is great even though its not real life, I just for one minute want to feel that happiness with my family.

//You can stay afraid, or slit the throat of fear and be brave//

Re: cant wait to get out of here

@safari93 

//You can stay afraid, or slit the throat of fear and be brave//

Re: cant wait to get out of here

Hey @j95 did you ever discuss some strategies for dealing with your mum with your Headspace counsellor?

Highlighted

Re: cant wait to get out of here

@j95  I feel for you buddy.  Familiy problems can be some of the toughest and most painful.  However, I thought I would just say that there is no 'perfect' family - no family is always happy and every family has their problems, just some more than others. Regarding your mother, I'm very sorry to hear about your relationship.  However, please keep in mind that she too may be grieving and hurting - sometimes when people are least deserving of love is when they need it the most.  She sounds like she is struggling to cope, and having someone as strong as you to continue to support her - even when she seemingly doesn't deserve it - would be huge.  The fact that you continue to try to support her is a true testament to your character and I strongly to encourage you to not completely cut off from her.

I hope things improve for you, you must be going through some tough times