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feeling scared about everything…

I dont know why but when i woke up this morning i was scared of so many different things i didnt want to get out of bed and got work. i thought staying in my bed would be the safest place. 

I was driving to work and all of a sudden i broke down crying an i dont know why. It took me longer to get to work so i was late and got into trouble. I'm usually happy when i get to workbut today i just wasnt myself. I was standing there talking to one of my parents ( i work in childcare) an i began to break down and cry again. She knows what im going through with the ancer treatment and Surgery next weekend but it really isnt like me to cry infron of people i usually keep it all in. 

I dont know if its becasue im scared of surgery next week or im just being a baby about everything... 

 

im so confused... Smiley Sad 

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Re: feeling scared about everything…

@Talitha93 ,

You poor thing, it's not suprising that with all you're going through, you'd had enough and just lost it today. You're not being a baby at all, you're having a completely understandable reaction to a very stressful situation!

Do you think your work would give you some compassionate leave - or do you feel better being at work and taking your mind off things?

 

Take care, be gentle with yourself.

blithe

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Re: feeling scared about everything…

I never cry infront of people and i hate that i lost it today. I have only ever lost it once before and that was when my grandfather passed away last year.. i felt so bad when i lost it infront of a parent-she just hugged me and cried a bit too..

This week is my last week for a few weeks due to surgery next week, but i feel better when im at work...

I jusy dont know what im supposed to do @blithe
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Re: feeling scared about everything…

I understand about feeling bad for losing it in front of people. I'm glad that the mum you lost it in front of hugged you. Sounds like you needed it today.

Keep us posted about how you're going.

 

xx

blithe

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Re: feeling scared about everything…

@blithe

its good i talk to this parent a bit about things and im glad it was her not anyone else...

Im so confused at what my purpose is in life. One minute i seem to be having the best of everything. Going for trials to play soccer for nsw to spending half my time at a doctors surgery only to be told I'm loosing my breasts. How is that fair

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Re: feeling scared about everything…

Hey @Talitha93 

doing something that you never normally do and try to avoid probably feels like a disappointment but it releases a lot of the pressure you put on yourself. A lot of strong people have breakdowns and it can be really healthy for them too.

 

 

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Re: feeling scared about everything…

@Student94

I don't cry infront of people and its a massive dissopointment to myself and embarrassing. Especially infront of a parent. Its a good thing i get along really well with this mother but still its a massive shock to my system...

I just feel lost at what I'm supposed to do
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Re: feeling scared about everything…

This is all new and uncharted territory for you @Talitha93 so I reckon it's pretty understandable if you lose it sometimes and don't really know how to react. You deserve a little kindness, especially from yourself, so don't be too disappointed. If the cry made you feel lighter and relieved some of those bottled-up emotions, perhaps it's not such a bad thing?

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Re: feeling scared about everything…

@ElleBelle 

 

i think its more of the fact that knowing i lost it once means i can loose it again anytime any day and that scares the hell out of me. im trying to be strong and act like everything is going to be okay- becasue thats whats your supposed to do right? you cant let people see you upset you have to be that strong person that everyone wants you to be. An im trying so hard to be that person everyone wants me to be. Im a childcare teacher im supposed to be a role model to them how can i be a role modle to them if all i do is cry?

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Re: feeling scared about everything…

Im really sorry to hear about that! Smiley Sad It's hard to go through something like that. I know how you feel my uncle had cancer and I had to see him go through that. I know it's not the same but just remember your not alone Heart