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i have not felt like this before

sorry to make another thread but i feel super super weird and i dont think this has happened before at least not like this. i feel really all over the place like literally i will be crying for about 3 minutes and then 30 seconds later i am jumping around super happy and laughing and feeling amazing and invincible and like powerful and then 30 seconds later i am back to crying and then sometimes it will be both at the same time and i feel so weird and i feel like i am on some special mission to save the world and like i have magical powers but then i am also like super paranoid that people are out to get me and then also i am super stressed about the eating and then also i feel like really agitated and then also i feel like a pressure inside me like i am about to explode and i dont feel good or bad but both at the same time and it is really hard to explain and i miss my pets and i want to scream and everything hurts and i dont know what to do. 

Re: i have not felt like this before

Hey there @Eden1717,

It's always okay to start a new thread if you feel that you need one. 

 

Having a new experience like the one you're describing sounds quite overwhelming. Do you think it'd be worth sharing some of this with your GP? 

 

There's nothing wrong with letting out a big scream (preferably into a pillow so you don't alarm anyone), sometimes it can be a great way of letting out some of the pressure we're feeling. Are there any self-care activities that you can do right now? Such as listen to music or watch TV?


We're here for you Eden

 

 

 


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I am finishing with ReachOut this week, say good-bye here. I'll miss you all!

Re: i have not felt like this before

@Jay-RO there is no way i could scream where i am and it not be heard even into a pillow. also i dont think that would actually help. i dont see the gp for just over a week so like that isnt going to help anything now anyway. i have been doing self care for months now and it obviously isnt working so like please stop suggesting that because i can guarantee i have already done that multiple times before coming one here. i dont mean to be rude but like i am just getting sick of people saying do self care like that great and all for some people but it isnt working for me. i literally feel like i am going to explode any second and i really dont know what is left to do i am really irritated at the moment as well and ugh idk what the hell to do meds arent an option therapy has done shit all self care is fucking useless and like nothing is helpful anymore so i am basically fucked. i am safe. 

Re: i have not felt like this before

Hey there @Eden1717, thank you for confirming your safety. 

 

You're not being rude at all, I can only imagine how frustrating it must be to hear people tell you the same thing when you've already tried it yourself and for so long. 

When I feel like nothing is working, I try to turn to distractions, such as some from this list here. You've probably tried many different things and it's okay if you don't want to try anything else.

 

I'm sorry that I don't have any answers or solutions, but we are always here to listen.  


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I am finishing with ReachOut this week, say good-bye here. I'll miss you all!

Re: i have not felt like this before

its ok my own doctors dont know what to do with me anymore. i am just really struggling maybe i will try a good old nap again and pretend i dont exist. 

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Re: i have not felt like this before

I CAN FEEL EVERYTHING!!!!!!!! like everything and i want to go back outside where everything feels alive and the air is fresh and i can feel the wind and there isnt the sound of electricity. inside is dead everything is dead and it is suffocating. i can hear them all in my head too like they are sending me thoughts again. and i feel really agitated and things feel all magical as well and i am not feeling right and i have so many thoughts right now and things keep coming in from places that arent in this world and i cant explain this never mind i feel super weird!

 

also i used to go on this other forum specifically for ocd and i thought about it today i stopped going on there years ago because some of the other members where very rude and bordering on bullying me and constantly telling me how i wasnt trying hard enough and how i was just being dramatic and lazy and how i was attention seeking because i told them i believed the thoughts and they said i didnt really i was just not trying to challenge them. but a few years after i stopped going on there i was diagnosed with schizoaffective disorder as well and found out a lot of those things were actually psychosis as well as ocd and i went back to the forum today and looked at it and saw the main member who was so mean to me and i felt awful and now i regret even thinking about it. 

Re: i have not felt like this before

Hi @Eden1717,

 

It sounds like you’re going through a lot.

 

I’m really sorry to hear about your experience on the OCD forum. I hope you feel much safer here. Some people can be really mean over the internet, and sometimes actually READING words can be so much more hurtful than hearing them, so I totally get where you’re coming from.

 

You’re definitely not being dramatic and lazy. What you’re going through right now is tough. You’ve posted on this forum and have sought professional advice to try and better your situation… that doesn’t sound lazy to me… in fact it seems quite the opposite.

 

Please be kind to yourself tonight Heart.

Re: i have not felt like this before

@Eden1717 I really hope that ReachOut is a forum you feel more comfortable to express your thoughts, no one here will bully you or make you feel bad for what you share with us. I want you to know we are all here to listen to you, without judgement, and help you in anyway that we can. Heart
I'm sorry you feel so overwhelmed and weird, maybe you could keep record of your thoughts and feelings (even screen shot this thread) in the next week and then you will be able to show your GP at your next appointment whats been going on for you, rather than have to explain it all at once, which could be too much..
You mentioned how much you want to go outside to experience and feel everything the outside world has to offer, do you do this? Do you go for walks or spend time outside? I find walking or even just sitting in the fresh air on some grass surrounded by nature does wonders for my mental health.
Hope you are feeling better this morning, today is a new day Smiley Happy

Re: i have not felt like this before

@TOM-RO@Jane_Rose i dont feel bullied on here. 

i have been sad all morning and crying i dont know what to do anymore i cant handle this it is too much i am trying so hard but if i hadnt screwed everything up to begin with none of this would have happened. i just feel like no matter how hard i try nothing is ever enough. i cant take this i am tired and i dont feel right and i am scared and i miss my pets and i just need a break i just need 10 minutes just 10 minutes for it to stop just for a little i am not asking for forever just for a little while so i can breathe again so i can take a breath without it crushing me just a breath. i am trying everything i can but it hurts so much i tried another nap but that isnt working either i am so exhausted. 

Re: i have not felt like this before

Sounds exhausting @Eden1717 . 

I can totally understand why you want to have a break for 10 mins from everything. 

 

How's the afternoon going? 

 

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I'm leaving ReachOut on the 5th of June Smiley Sad Say goodbye here