i have not felt like this before

[Eden1717]

@trashconverters i have seen GP's, psychologists, psychiatrists and nurses. i have been seeing psychiatrists since i was 2-3. none of them have done or come up with anything helpful long term. i have seen enough specialists for a lifetime probably more than some people would ever see in their whole lives. i have tried over 20 different medications all of which were awful i have paid over $60,000 dollars in therapy in the past 7 years alone and again none of it has helped long term. i have had over 25 admissions to psych wards and again that has been useless and actually very traumatic and made things WORSE. i am not angry at you but i am fed up with the medical system and its lies. i have tried harder than i have tried with anything else just to keep my head above water and still i know i will sink my legs and arms are exhausted and i havent enough breath to simply float plus even if i wanted to the waves are too big. i will drown maybe not today but i will drown and it wont be from old age.  

[trashconverters]

That sounds rough and I'll admit it's not something I've had personal experience with.

What I'd suggest is going to a GP and asking about two things - see if you can get a medical certificate if you have work or uni or school, since you're in such a way right now it should be pretty easy to get one, and it sounds like you really need a break.

Secondly, get them to check your blood pressure and your pulse. A lot of anxiety can manifest physically, which means it might need to be treated that way. If you've got high blood pressure, like myself and one of my friends who also has pretty bad anxiety does, treating your blood pressure might provide relief.

[letitgo]

Hey @Eden1717  I am so proud of your perseverance in this face of all that frustration and overwhelming feelings. What do you have planned for today?

Thinking of you!  

[Eden1717]

@trashconverters  yes my gp gives me certificates when i need them and blood pressure is fine

@letitgo i am not sure it is perseverance or just a lack of other options i mean it is either this or i just die so like idk what else i am meant to do. i am meant to be studying i will i will get to it. but i am feeling a bit weird today so we will see when i manage to do it.  

[letitgo]

How did you go with studying today @Eden1717?